2006-08-01 02:04:55 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
One of the problems we have in English is that "love" covers different feelings. Whether lust, unconditional love, platonic love, romantic love, affection, enjoyment of another and so on.
Psychologically, the butterflies in the stomach sort of "love" lasts for about 2 years, which allows us to get to know the other person and tolerate or normalise their irritating habits. This should be replaced by a desire to work as a team and want what is good for the other person and any offspring and/or belongings shared. This is why it is never a good idea to make a lifelong commitment before that excitement fades. It's also why relationships worked better with a long term courtship without sex.
The "butterflies" stage is mostly a number of chemical and psychological reactions to the other person. The physical attraction is often redolent of the significant adult or adults who we felt emotionally attached to (height, humour, cooking, intelligence, weight etc). Smell plays a factor. Not just the pheromones we hear so much about, but also someone who has a different immunity type to us smells good on a subconscious level to improve the health of offspring.
Once the "butterflies" stage ends, we can then look upon our partner dispassionately. We then usually discover that they have many likenesses to the parent who we wanted something from but for some reason they were unable to give. This is why so many people seem to always fall for alcoholics or physically/emotionally/sexually abusive people. It is our way of trying to "fix" the lack in our past. Sub-consciously we feel that if we make our partner more emotionally mature/ loving/ less controlling/ more controlling/ nurturing/ caring/ less angry/ more faithful etc (delete as necessary) we can repair the lack we had as children and often still have as adults.
Unfortunately, this is often doomed to failure as we have chosen people who have the same deficiencies that we do. Further we try to fix them rather than fixing ourselves as it is easier and more comfortable to do so.
Therefore:- yes, love does exist.
To love another successfully we must first be able to love and nurture ourselves.
Love is a process. The first 2 years are are chemical and psychological. The rest are what we make it.
Love is an action and a choice. The best written description of this action and choice that I have found is in the New Testament (1 Corinthians, chapter 13).
2006-08-01 03:18:51 · answer #1 · answered by krazykarenteague 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is coming from a person who's found true love. I was in a 4 year relationship and I swore I was in love. Well, after 4 years I wanted to kill this person! I finally decided to leave this person. Not too long after I found someone who would change my life forever! I couldn't even explain what it was I was feeling only a few months into this relationship. They were everything I ever dreamed could exist in a person. I felt like there was nothing I wouldnt do for this person. I would give up an eternity in heaven and go to hell just so they could go to heaven instead. A lot of people think they are in love, but its only a feeling of excitement and being use to being with the same person. Being in love with someone means that you always put thier feelings before yours and would stop at nothing for them to be happy (even if its not with you)! Being in love means that you feel content with this person and no one or nothing can come between you two. It's been a little over 3 years now and my feelings for this person only grow stronger. We've had obsticals in this relationship that should have ended it like you wouldnt believe. But we always made it through cause of our love for eachother. Now we are having our first child together and are ready to spend the rest of our lives with eachother. Love is PATIENCE, FAITHFUL, KIND, FORGIVING, and this crazy feeling that no matter how hard you try you just cannot figure out what to call it. This feeling makes the word "LOVE" seem too small of a phrase for what you feel
2006-08-04 09:41:12 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is an act of the will. It's something that we do, not something that we feel.
The "butterflies" you feel when you see that special person is not love - that's called attraction, and it provides the spark for true love, which comes later.
The bible says that "Love is patient, love is kind, etc." In other words, it's something you have to work at every day. You must SHOW love. You don't just walk around all day feeling it.
So how will you know when you love someone? A better question is, does the person know you love them by the way you treat them? Do you put their needs first? Do you want what's best for them? Do you serve them in humility, not expecting a reward?
And remember that love is not just about couples (although God did bless couples with an amazing kind of love). Love is something that we must work at and give to everyone around us - our children, our parents, our neighbors and even our enemies.
2006-08-01 02:24:46 · answer #3 · answered by Veritas 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Her question is thoroughly wrong. Love, being an emotion, has no tangible high quality hence can't be proved with out examples of non-public journey. Atheists use this argument to disprove the life of God, yet God (if he exists) is infallible, meaning any strategies God might hire to tutor his very own life might propose he has, for a 2nd a minimum of, entertained the prospect that he does not exist. See additionally: the Babelfish and the Flying Spaghetti Monster. What you need to ask your self is why this question bothers you plenty - is it considering you in basic terms decide for to tutor her incorrect? if so, then honest adequate - i'm plenty the comparable myself. Or are you so pissed off via the question considering you think of in case you could no longer locate the respond then that makes her top? have you ever been in love? definite? then you fairly be responsive to it exists and would experience sorry for this female. it is like attempting to describe the colour blue to a blind guy or woman. whilst she falls in love herself she will have the skill to no longer ask such stupid questions.
2016-11-03 10:57:12 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love does exist but true love comes with responsibility, care and compromise. Love is filled with sharing, acceptance and understanding. Love has its ups and downs.. because love is life and life can never be 100% perfect!
2006-08-01 02:17:10 · answer #5 · answered by aida 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i believe if a person say he or she loves you there shouldn't be a reason eg beauty/wealth behind the love cos if those things wud happen not 2 be there again there won't b love,so a person should not love for a reason,
2006-08-01 02:20:54 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
love does exist, i know, its such a good feeling when u seee that person u love, u feel like u get butterflies everytime, and ur heart starts racing faster, when u love someone ur heart will tell u
2006-08-01 02:09:52 · answer #7 · answered by Victoria 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is real and when you are in love you will know.
2006-08-01 02:09:15 · answer #8 · answered by honey lugs 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try finding someone you like and learn practically. Much better that way.
2006-08-01 02:08:47 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
love just is and you know it when you feel it.
2006-08-01 02:11:33 · answer #10 · answered by Jooles 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋