what to do when i get severe angry? Pls be serious i am asking for help?

Question

i have a 2 yr old and i am very frustrated and i get very bad angry at my baby because my husband is whole week away from us and when he come back home over the weekend he wont even help me or love my 2 yr old for all these things i get angry and i am very scared i might harm my child pls somebody sugest self therapy and ways to control anger

Answer 1

you need time mangement, your 2 year old is the incocent one here dont let him/her be the victim. you need to take time out go for a walk outside or even take time with your 2 year old but dont take your fustrations out on the inocent one. you need to also talk to your husband and explain to him what is happening. before its to late. failing that you need proffesional help. good luck

Answer 2

Hey I have a two year old too...been there, My husbamd also works all the time i only see him on Sundays. Well ne ways. When your feeling frustratied, Lay your child in his/her crib, playpen or some other safe place bring your baby monitoir and go out side and take a breather for a minute, read two pages in a book or magizne or watch TV for a little..He or she might get up set but it is better to let them cry then to do the other thing... have faith it will get better. now I have a question for u.. if ur husband is an A HOLE then why are u still with him...DUH LEAVE HIS A** ull be beter for it...to ur self and your child... If you want to e mail me u can
[e-mail]

It's Ok....
Stay at home mom Palm Coast Fl

Answer 3

First of all...Do you work? Or are you a stay home mom? Either way, don't take your frustratons out on your child. Is it you & the child your husband is neglecting when he is home? Seems there is more here than what you are saying. You have to deal with your anger toward your husband. The child is innocent. Self help? Check your priorities. He sounds like a selfish guy and if you can live without him all week long you can probably live without him permanently if that is the case and be better off, you and your child. Don't let a man's neglect ruin the life of you and your child.

Answer 4

well you obviously realize that the problem is your husband and not your baby, and even though i don't have kids i know how it is to take your anger on whoever is there at the time...your husband is problably the kind of guy you can't really talk to about your problem, and if he's not even helping you out why are you staying with him? don't ever stay married just for the child, if you're not happy with him, it sounds like he makes you angry all the time, that's what causes it, you don't need that in your life...would you be better of without him? if so, get a divorce, you can get child support, i know it's very complicated but both you and your child will be better off that way...i was raised by a single mom and i'm better off then seeing my mom miserable...i know kids whose parents stayed together just for them and they are miserable because when the parents aren't happy the child comes out to be abusive or just...messed up, you know? so...i don't suggest therapy but i suggest divorce...when you're in a situation where you're not happy, analize it, think about what's making you unhappy and get rid of it...it's simple, yet complicated but you'll be much happier and less angry...hope this helped a little bit...i wish you all the luck in the world...
and if all fails, pray to God, even if you don't believe in him, i'm not saying he's gonna come down and get rid of your husband for you but he'll open your eyes, and that's a promise...

Answer 5

Your anger isn't stemmed from your child, your child is just your outlet at this point... direct your anger toward the actual source. You need to have a serious heart to heart with your husband. The feelings you are having are normal, and any woman who says they have never had the emotions that you are dealing with are either in total denial or lying. Until you can reach some solution with your husband on this, you need to find ways to redirect your anger. When you feel yourself losing control, walk away. As long as you know your child is in a safe place.. leave the room and scream in to a pillow, pound on the mattress... go out in the back yard and throw rocks... anything that will get you passed that moment. Don't try and find a way to dissolve your anger all at once... just deal with each episode as it occurs. There are plenty of ways for you to get help for this... call your area MHMR society office and they will get you help for free. I think you are already on a good path, you can still recognize that you have a problem. Just remember the next time you get angry that your baby did not cause it... look into her/his eyes and realize that this tiny miracle sees you as their entire world, and when you do things that cause fear in them, it chips away at that bond each and every time. You need professional help, please don't underestimate your abilities to control yourself, if you keep on this way you will eventually cross the line and hurt your child. Peace.

Answer 6

The best thing to do is hire a baby sitter or call one of your trusty relatives to watch the baby and allow yourself some free time for yourself each day. Go out, do some shopping, visit a spa, sign up for a class at your local community college or go out with some girl friends for a cup of tea. You obviously need to spend some "me" time.

I'm not a counselor of any sort and I don't endorse divorce but maybe it is time you sit down and voice your concerns with your husband. Tell him what you've just told the world. If you can't work things out with him, pack yourself and your baby a bag and leave. Your anger toward your husband is being directed toward your baby.

Another suggestion is to turn to your house of worship. Someone there would be more than happy to help you talk through your circumstances and provide support.

Answer 7

I truly respect you for pointin out your problem b4 anything happens. But maybe you want to get some help from a counselor or something. I know 2 year olds are alot more than a handful but when your child experiences anger all the time it might affect them negatively in to future. In the bible it says, "Those who are wise are slow to wrath." Just be patient.

Answer 8

I am a mother of three. my advice is when you feel this way, put the child in a safe place( playpen, crib, ect.) and walk away. talk 5 to 10 min to calm down and then go back and adress the situation. never never hit a child. if possable, have grandparents watch child a few hours a week. this will help

Answer 9

I can't tell you anything else except maybe see a therapist or something... maybe hire a babysitter for a few nights a week and set aside a few hours on those nights just for you .... write in a jouranl...take a walk... a long hot bath... go get ur nails done.. dinner with a close gf... anything .. to "pamper" urself ... as for dealing with ur two year old ... just try to be patient ... don't do anything rash ... that u'll regret later...pray... :) and know that I am praying for u :) !!! Take care ... Best of Luck!!!

Answer 10

Ms. Kiran, I am Ravi Chandra am not a Psychologist, am just a normal human like you and lead my life.
I accept to your point that controlling anger is the one of the diffucult issue for people like us who are busy with day to day life for survival.
But i would like you to think about some specific issues which are important for us to lead this life.
a) Pateience.
b) Forgiveness.
c) Accepting the things as they are or thinking practically.
d) Apply logical thinking to life problems.

I mean in what I say, We as human we are prone to do mistakes. And mistakes do happen because of in sufficient understanding on a given situation.
If u start thinking, What for your partner is away from you for a week, then u will come to know about a reality.
If you start thinking, how much your partner is missing you in these 6 days and what could be the mental status of him in this 6 days. Then you will start getting an understanding that
As your husband is out for a week which was tiresome with work schedules and so on, he needs to realax or to refresh, So I need to give him that refreshment which he needs. This refreshment is required for him becaues he should get ready for the next week.

And comming to the issue of, loving the kid and helping you:
they are many ways to express love and affection towards wife and kid. As me being a husband with a kid i do express my affection in different way.

You should not expect that your partner express his love and affection in the way you want to do it.
Instead you find out in what way his is expressing and see whether you find it acceptable. If yes then you are happy.
If not you can put forward to your partner that the way he is expressing his affections is not enough, remeber nothing is wrong. An approach to express love and affection may be sufficient or satisfactory.
Never it is wrong or right !.
If you think in the angle of wrong or right then you get trapped in a complicated thinking leading to loss of pateience and resulting in
ANGRY.

According to me, humans are blessed with an ABILITY to THINK, and we need to think on some issues more to practical orientation rather than attaching emotional issues to it.

Regarding Kids, Kids are meant for doing mischefs, When you were a kid you have done the same thing.
And kids do this because, they have an inquisitive mind to know new things and in course of action they land up in doing some thing which we call it as mischefs

Hope I could give you some ray of hope in solving your probs.

Answer 11

Read the Bible and focus on thepositive things in life and always remember that your child is a gift from God and you should always feel thankful for him for just like he gave you that gift he can most definitely take it away and i know you love your child so dont let some little thing come in between that, you know what I mean.