2006-07-31 17:21:44 · 23 answers · asked by R P 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Adolescent
She's 15 he's 1st b/f & is14 live 15 miles apart only contact is at each other's homes. This happened at mine while my wife was cooking they were playing a video game in another room. We have had "the talk" several times starting when she was 10. Nothing else happened, I CAN & DO trust her. HE just found out what MY boundaries are & may need to change his shorts now. They start different schools next week. Problem solved. Thanks!
2006-08-01 08:16:37 · update #1
First, listen to your wife. She sounds reasonable & you sound like 1 mad, loving father! Congrats for that, there are a lot of kids who would be thrilled to have such caring parents, not that they would admit it. lol! I'd talk to your daughter & find out how far things went. I hope they stopped at the hicky. Then I'd invite the boy & his parents over for a little chat about their behavior. I have a feeling they are too young to be into "heavy petting" or more than holding hands & a little goodbye hug & kiss. Just stay calm & trust that you have raised a good, smart girl.
2006-08-01 08:04:17 · answer #1 · answered by grrl 7 · 11⤊ 1⤋
Kids are more mature these days & are doing things much younger than when we were kids. I agree with your wife, talk to your daughter, find out if they have gone any farther. If you have raised her right, she probably was just pushing the boundaries & it sounds like she your wife will get her point across. If you loose your temper she won't tell you anything anymore. I'd make it clear to the boy that he is on your s##t list. I'd make sure they wouldn't have the chance to do it again.
2006-07-31 17:48:04 · answer #2 · answered by awnery 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
a hickey maybe the sign for them of love or what ever but let them know that is in fact a blood clot and it can go to the brain or heart and cause death..and ask them are they willing to kill the person they love for a mark on the body? and tell them they should respect each other and love each other not to do that or any thing else until they are older.
2006-07-31 17:30:51 · answer #3 · answered by montanamom 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I believe your wife's approach is good but don't be too relaxed about the situation otherwise she is going to take what you say lightly and may end up getting more involved with her boyfriend sexually thinking that nothing is going too happen to her as far as punishment but if your too hard she will rebel and trust me i am 18 with strict parents and Ive done the opposite of what they said my whole life
2006-07-31 17:33:47 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hahah well i was in this position about 3 days ago. (im the daughter) so this might be some help. i think you should talk to your daughter, she might not say much back but she WILL listen. dont be too hard on her then shell just get angry, let her know you dont want her to go further with the guy, and tell her how you really feel. just dont yell, it worsens things. its nice to have a calm mom to talk about these kind of things with. hope this helps!
2006-07-31 17:25:58 · answer #5 · answered by Jessica F 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i have a good point to run by you... at least they're taking their sexual tension out by doing things that dont involve sex... keep in mind that today its "cool" for teenagers to have hickeys cus it kinda marks that they have someone that cares a lot about them and stuff... i understand you're upset and probably want to ring the little bastard's neck but just calmly talk to her about it and explain that you're not comfortable with her doing stuff like that. and yes sometimes it is a good idea to get the boyfriend involved and just clear up some things... just try your best to keep your cool and make this be as painless as possible... besides shes probably mortified enough that you saw it lol good luck tho :-)
2006-07-31 17:28:10 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Definitely have a talk with your daughter's boyfriend. You might also consider chaperoned dates and don't allow them to be alone without an adult in the room. Explain why you're instituting these guidelines and let them know up front you mean business.
2006-07-31 17:26:21 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How old is your daughter? if shes 15 or over, then it's going to happen whiether you freak out or not. Just because she has hickeys doesn't mean shes having sex.
Seriously, my friend dated this guy who would give her TONS of hickeys all over her neck, it was so nasty. But she didnt start having sex with him until a year or so later. They would just makeout and suck necks...
2006-07-31 17:27:27 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I cannot say this clearly enough. DO NOT MAKE A BIG DEAL. If you do, you will never ever know anything about her ever again. You will never see another hickey because she'll be getting them in places you can't see. Get it?? Be nice to them. Even if you don't like him. Why? She'll get rid of him on her own. Seriously.
2006-07-31 17:26:22 · answer #9 · answered by nikki_in_brizzy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is goin 2 make her want 2 talk 2 him some more take it 4rm me.i kno if ur daughter is 13 n older she might be sexually active u shold have the TALK w/ her as if she was a grown person dont bs her b/c then she will b/s u..dont talk 2 him talk 2 her b/c he wont do anythin she wont let him
2006-07-31 17:41:54 · answer #10 · answered by Asia B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋