Temptation...?

Question

I am a married female. I am going back to college and I have found myself really attractive to a man there at the school. Tempation is so hard to resist. I have been good about that so far. I mean, I love my husband but I am thinking about this guy when we are intimiate. There is something wrong with that ,you know? Anyone have any words of wisdom?

Answer 1

As long as you are with your husband, you can close your eyes and he can be anyone you want.

Answer 2

You have a choice to make.Husband,Guy you met at school.You know that the right thing to do is stay away from the other guy.Do you want your marriage to last or end?Do you love your husband or do you not care about the consequences of having an affair?You already know there is something wrong with that picture,it's up to you to get the color back in focus.Not an easy thing to deal with is it?Your main focus should be on your family,then school,that's all.The other guy is not an option.He's is going to have to be like a closed book that you had a glimpse at but chose not to read or like a hard covered novel that you won't put down because the first few pages entice you to the point were you think you have to go all the way.

Answer 3

Yikes! This is tricky. You are in a tough situation. the best advice is to distance yourself from this temporary obsession you are having, otherwise, there could too easily come a time when you "slip." That's called being human, don't beat yourself up over it. You are feeling something very normal and very human. the question you have to ask yourself is not is there something wrong in your marriage (as I am sure some will infer, but you know better), rather how will you look your husband in the eyes year after year if you do give in to temptation? You are too vulnerable to be near this person. Try not to make excuses like "I have to take this class" or anything like that, if you value your relationship with your husband. I have more, you can email me if you'd like, but somethings I do not want to put on this public site.

Answer 4

If you love your husband as much as you say you do then you will be smart enough not to hurt him, listen to Rihanna's Unfaithful and maybe it will make you think twice about it. Be like me and my lady, this is what I tell her " You can think other guys are hot, but if you start thinking of them in ways other than that their is something wrong with what you see of our relationship and before you make any moves, lets talk about it first." In other words, talk to your husband about these feelings. Try to Establish a reason for the way your feeling and solve them with him, If you however choose to ignore this and have an affair you will have an undeniably guilty feeling while doing it. And it could end up seperating you both from the guy you are attracted to and your husband both. SO all in all. If you wanna go with someone else break off with your husband and do it, but dont make him suffer through it.

Answer 5

Been there repeatedly. It takes much concentration to stay married, especially when you are testing the water somewhere else. In fact, I quit my last job because of something like this. It was HARD!!!! And just about the last thing I wanted to do, too. My marriage has been really rough for years now, and there are too many men to look at, but I have two kids, and I can't break their lives for the sake of my pleasure (illicit as it would be, as well). Tune out the other guy, and put more focus on your hubby. Good luck!

Answer 6

Change schools, or change your marriage status. Do you honestly believe that it's good that "so far" you haven't cheated? That infers that you ARE contemplating cheating. Make up your mind about what you want to be, a wife, or a woman free to see anybody they please. Personally, I've seen and met hundreds of women that I consider attractive. But, since I'm married, I just appreciate attractive women, and go home to the ONE lady I love. There 's the old saying- "The grass is always greener on the other side of the fence." Grow up, and be a wife, or get a divorce.

Answer 7

It sounds as though something could be missing in your relationship with your husband. Do you feel appreciated, loved and supported by him? Find out what is missing and work on your relationship with your husband.

It is easy to start to feel as though you are just a college student looking for someone because of your environment. I'm sure it's exciting for you to be there and you enjoy looking at the men. There is nothing wrong with finding someone attractive, but you shouldn't be thinking about someone else when you are intimate with your husband. Look at your husband when you are intimate and tell yourself that you are with him. If a thought of another man crosses your mind, get rid of the thought. How would you feel if he were thinking of someone else?

Don't be tempted by someone else. You say you love your husband so don't do something to destroy your marriage.

Answer 8

Forget that guy. Do you really want to mess up your marriage over feeling lust for another man that may not never commit to you? Stay with your husband. These days it's hard to find a good man and if you already have a good man why risk it over temptation. Besides what if he is already in a relationship? Again, Forget that man he's not worth it. Your husbands is.

Answer 9

First of all it is just human nature to think about opposite sex. The rule is look but DO NOT touch. If you are not happy in your marriage and decide to stray then the trust and desire was never there to begin with. You should at least be honest enough to tell your husband before you do decide to act. It would be horribly wrong to not tell him at all. Are you sure that you really want what you are thinking? Isn't your husband and life you started good enough?

Answer 10

I cannot offer any words of wisdom, but I have found myself in the same boat. I think it will wear off after a while, you just have to talk to yourself and think about how good you really do have it and how much you would be risking to do something with that other person.... I tell myself that all the time, believe me I know its hard.

Answer 11

Amanda, all I can say is make the choice not to do it. I can promise you it will never be worth the pain you will cause in the lives of others, and probably your own too.

Choose not to think about this guy when you are with your husband. Choose not to be around him or give him any signals, and choose to find out what is missing in your marriage. Maybe your husband does not affirm you enough or listen to you...