that your PREGNANT friend of 10 years was planning on tellin her present spouse that the baby is his, WHEN you know that's a lie. Would you...drift away..slowly? or be an accessory to his lie. I HATE LIES. What would you do? Please help
2006-07-31 15:15:42 · 14 answers · asked by Bored Latina 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
stay away from it. it's none of your business. it may be a lie, but it's not your truth to tell. it will eventually come out.
2006-07-31 15:20:22 · answer #1 · answered by lilgracie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're in a situation where you're torn between friendship and telling the truth. Somehow, it is your friend's job to tell her husband that the baby isn't his. Much as you hate lies and you do not want to be conspirators, let her do the talking. It'll hurt her husband and your friend more if you're the one to break the news. Encourage your friend to tell her hubby in a gentle and non-condemning manner. If she still decides not to tell, it's her issue and not yours.
Ultimately, the truth will come to light. No lies can hide too long. This situation is really testing the marriage of your friend. In long run, it's the baby who's the victim here.
Leave the situation alone, there's nothing you can do except advicing your friend.
2006-07-31 22:27:56 · answer #2 · answered by denizen251 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok if it was me, I would "hint" to the present spouse about getting a DNA test!
I would not speak to this "pregnant friend", if she tries to get me to take part in the lie...
(I was already involved in something like this, a girlfriend of my wife, and my best buddy. She cheated on him and had him buy her a house in the Country in order to cheat on him some more, because "I" knew about it and she was afraid I was going to TELL on her... I was asked by the wife and her to promise not to tell, and it galled me to no end!! I told them if he asks, I will tell it all! He never asked, and I dropped enough hints, with out telling him...
Its a shame, but she divorced him and then she got cheated on by her boyfriends...
I would never go though this again, I would tell every time now, and let the chips fall where they may!! She cheated, and its her fault. He needs to know its not his, so he can take what ever action he deems is necesary for him and his family. (who knows, she may even have given him a social disease or something..sheesh!)...
I wish you well..
Jesse
2006-07-31 22:57:08 · answer #3 · answered by x 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As uncomfortable as it makes you, it's really none of your business. If you get in the middle, your friend and her husband will hate you for it. She'll likely deny it, and he'll believe her over you. Then it will cause problems for them, and you'll never be welcome in that house again. She might also tell your common friends that you are a liar and then they might start to distrust you too. I'd stay out of it if I were you. It will come to light eventually. And if it doesn't then maybe they will be one happy family with the husband never being the wiser. He can love and raise the kids same as if it were his. And the kid might just grow up in a happy family of both parents, a rarity in this day.
If you want to end your friendship with her, then that's your decision to make, but don't cause trouble where none exists.
2006-07-31 22:23:41 · answer #4 · answered by welches_grape_jelly 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I"m so sorry your in that situation, but you seem like a good person.. You should really try to convince her to tell him the truth.. If she won't, you can always tell her that you can't stand beside her and watch her ruin someones life purposely.. I suggest you don't be an accessory to lies..
2006-07-31 22:24:10 · answer #5 · answered by Deu 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your life is in termoil but you should let the innoscent party know that she is trying to trap him with the child. It is not his and then walk away as you don't need her in your life as she lies and you will never no if she is telling you truth and you would never be able to trust her.You shouldn't feel terrible after it all has finished as you will feel better as you have told the truth to everyone who needs to know about the situation.
2006-07-31 22:28:13 · answer #6 · answered by debbie_dixon19 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the situation calls for tact and friendship.Try sitting down with your friend and try to explain how you feel about it and let them know that you do not want to be a part of the lies.I they are a true friend then they will understand how much it will hurt you if they go ahead with the lie.If they don't want to know how much it will affect you then the best thing to ndo is to let the other party know just how you feel as D.N.A testing wil prove paternity.
2006-07-31 22:21:29 · answer #7 · answered by flying_eagle_72 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think I would tell him the truth myself. I hate lies too!!! Even if it hurts your friend, it will hurt him to know that that child is not his after he raised he/she for a long period of time.
2006-07-31 22:19:58 · answer #8 · answered by me_myself 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you can only advise your friend and support her. try to help her make the right choice, but it is her choice, its not really up to you, unless you and the husband are great friends also. then tell her she has to tell him or you will. or that if she dont tell him you cannot be friends because you cannot tell this lie.
2006-07-31 22:25:03 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
take no part of this lie, you have enough to worry about in youre own life. or just call the jerry springer show he'll put her out there quick
2006-07-31 22:22:10 · answer #10 · answered by 1plum 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋