why feel so hurt?

Question

My husband recently hurt my feelings in a way tht jolted my perception of him .Not infidelity but seemed to just want to hurt my feelings.I was suprised at the gut feeling Im having like someone died .Is this normal?

Answer 1

Talk it over with him until you're satisfied with the answer.

Answer 2

First let me say that I am not married, but I have experienced something near what I believe you may be feeling. Something did die, your expectations of him. You didn't expect for him to "just want to hurt" you. So, yes it is normal.

See we all go into relationships with our own idea of how we are suppose to be treated and vice versa, unfortunately the those ideas are ideals.

With that being said, may offer some advice,tell your husband that your feelings did indeed get hurt. But before you tell him that make sure you know what exactly about what was said or done hurt your feelings. One of the best gifts God has given us, is the ability to understand ourselves and the reason why and how react to the events of this life. Then just tell him just that what you realized about why you reacted that way/why your feelings got hurt. Once that is said, don't bring it back up again...
Remember Love forgives, so should we.

I hope this helps...
Be Blessed!

Answer 3

In a relationship, things will be said and feelings will get hurt. Slips of the tongue and misunderstandings happen all the time. What you found in him was willful cruelty, though. That says an awful lot about who a person truly is underneath the facade they prefer to show. Maybe it was a moment of complete frustration and he was at the breaking point, but maybe he really isn't who you thought he was. Either way, I'm very sorry.

Answer 4

Through life, when someone that is so close to us doing something wrong and hurt our feeling. the pain will surely go moor deeper inside. Somehow if your husband is a good man, dont change your perception n your respect upon him. Maybe he want you to learn in this hard and hurt way. Better thing to do is to comunicate with him.

Answer 5

your feelings are real and their is nothing wrong with the way you feel. It is very important that you find a convenient time and talk to your husband about how your feeling toward what he said to you. when you talk to him in order to get him to listen use I statements so he won'tbecome defensive. ex: i felt very hurt when, if you say you did such and such then he will become defensive and not accept or receive it. I believe this is something that can be worked out and I don't want to see another failed marriage in the world. He needs to validate how you feel so you should in no uncertain terms share your hurt with him.

Answer 6

Little things have a way of building and building until they get completely out of hand. Talk to him. Don't store it up inside, this is what causes resentments and split ups.

Answer 7

Your grieving a death in the precept ion of who you thought he was. He has betrayed your trust and sense of security. If someone loves someone else, they do not try to intentionally try to hurt their feelings. This is a major red flag in your relationship, really examine this.

Answer 8

Yes, I think it's normal because he did something that you did not think he was capable of right? so now you are wondering if you even know him at all right? You and him need to talk this over so you can put it to rest. Hope it all works outand that he begs your forgiveness, and never does it again.

Answer 9

Sounds par for the course of any relationship.My suggestion is to get off the computer and talk to him about it and not an internet forum.

Answer 10

yes, it could be, depending on what he did. i always thought in love, there were some lines you don't cross even when angry, esp name calling, insulting, being rude, being cold, etc. when the loved one does cross the line, it feels like a betrayal and like you never really knew them. it's pretty unnerving. if what happened is trivial then you may be overreacting. you must decide this, but you are not alone in your reaction.