Is it wrong to cut ties with family?

Question

People feel the need to keep close to family because they are "family"...i dont feel that way though...i think whoever shows you they care and are there for you should be labeled family and that is good enough

Answer 1

I agree completely. So many people buy in to the whole theory that you have to tolerate them, you have to forgive them, you have to be involved with them..because they are family. To me offenses committed by 'family' should be considered much greater offenses because they are the last people that should be doing things to hurt you so I consider it much worse and put up with it much less. Besides, some families are just not close, mine isn't. If you want to be forgiven for something you better come up with a better excuse than they are family. I have a sister whose crazy crap I put up with for 30 years because she was family, then one day it just suddenly dawned on me that I didn't want to and I didn't have to and that if we weren't sister we wouldn't be friends at all so that was that. Life has been much more peaceful since then!

Answer 2

I respect your feelings about family and I certainly admire those who are close to theirs, but as we all began to grow older - there are so many changes within each of us that either keep us together or pull us apart. I think every family had to work out some differences - have lost a member through sickness/death - has drug/alcohol/abuse issues that we turn away from - or are having the personality conflict of who meets up with the lifestyle (material issues) but they are still family! If it means you have to pull away for a reason - then take that space since only you can accept or make a turn around for the best. Keep in contact though - like a simple hello, I'm doing fine, hope everyone is! keep it short and simple. It's a beginning to open a new relationship and bury the old. Take care and God Bless!

Answer 3

You have to judge that for yourself. Some families can be very detrimental for your health. If either the history you have with specific people in your family cause you mental issues that you are not able to overcome then it is better for you to remove yourself from the situation. IE mental, physical or sexual abuse. (do not expect others to change) you can only change how you react to them and the situations that arise. Do not do it out of malice or it will catch up with you. You must make the decision out of what's best for you, not to show someone else what they may never see.
You have to be aware that by cutting ties with family sometimes you cut your only lifeline. If you are a strong individual this can be done but it can be very lonely. friends can come and go but (usually) family will be there for you. If you are not a strong person and you have relied on family for support you swill seek that support elsewhere and that support may not stay with you. That can be very devastating.
Personally I would shut the door but not lock it. Remember family is what you make it. Just because someone is blood doesn't mean they care any more than anyone else (not the same as loyalty). You have to make that decision based on your circumstances.

Good luck!

Answer 4

This would depend on the type of family that you come from. If your family is close knit and looks out for each other, the family ties should be preserved even during difficult times. If your family is cold and distant and brings sadness and negativity into your life, you might want to distance yourself from them. You don't have to completely cut the ties but you may want to handle them with a long-handled spoon. I would not recommend totally cutting the ties because one day you may reproduce if you haven't already, and your offspring need to know who they share blood with so that there won't be any cross breeding confusion. Also, you should never forget where you came from, whether it is from a household like the Huxtables or a dysfunctional family. Just stay focused on the positive and surround yourself with positive people and things. I would love it if that meant that each person could be encompassed in the love of their family but the reality is that some families suck. If you have a family that bites the big one but you have others that genuinely care for you and your well-being, you can consider those other people family. As for me and mine, we have each other's back. My parents are divorced, but they both instilled a strong sense of family pride and unity in my siblings and me. I have 5 brothers and a sister. Do what is truly best for you but try not to burn bridges that you may need to get back over.

Answer 5

I feel the same, i cut ties with my dad, because he felt that I was responsible for keepign close to him, and i stopped calling as much, and i still sent some cards, but he never tried to call me.

everyone on his side of the family, my aunts and uncles, never tried to call either. i dont feel the need too anymore... If they cant, even though i've tried alot, cant return the favor, then they dont care enough about me to keep trying. I dont have to try for my mom's side of the family, and they live just as far... why should i have to play cat, and mouse, with them?

Listen, when you start your own family, it will be your family, when you become something more, and they want to be back in your life, you know something is up. If they dotn show interest, it's not your fault, no one is too busy to pick up the phone for a few minutes... to say hello.

Dont listen to anyone that tells you other wise. Theres millions of people out there, that you are related too, but dont know it, does that mean you should contact all of them? even if they do share the same blood as you? nope. Do whatever makes you happy, because thats the most important thing. Do you want to try to be close, then have children, and try to get them to be a part of their lives to? it's a never ending battle... and it shouldn't have to be that way.

Answer 6

If there are certain people in your family that you don't agree with, or get along with, just limit your interactions to yearly family events or holidays. You don't have to "cut ties." You may not think so now, but a day may come when you desperately need your family. It sounds like you come from a dysfunctional or abusive family situation, since you seem to have little feeling for those around you.

Answer 7

It's not necessarily wrong to cut ties with your family. It depends on what they are like. They may be horrible people. I say if you can work things out, then that is best, but that is not always possible I know from experience. You are family by accident, not by choice. I feel that if I had friends who treated me the way that some of my family members do, they would no longer be my friends.

Answer 8

Yes.
Give and take is what makes a family tie great. Cutting ties is often an emotional outburst .If you are not happy with certain developments, leave things to cool down to its logical conclusions and also try to understand others point of view. Longer the ties last, the greater it is.

Answer 9

You should never cut ties with your family. You don't have to have them be your best friends but respect the fact they are family. Time changes things and you never know what the future holds. There are alot of people out there who cut ties only to regret it later. There is no greater pain than to lose the oppurtunity to reconcile with someone and tell them one last time you care. There are alot of people out there in the world that regret the stubborness of their hearts. Don't become one of them.

Answer 10

Thats real wrong look blood is thicker dan water man u can keep family always but friends can come and go. Remember dat cause u may be in a situation where u need help and only family comes through thats when you will know who really cares.