Hi I am 18 years old and I am sort of at a crossroads. My friend Mason(name changed) has been really supportive in our friendship and is helping me with the difficult transition to being an openly gay man.
I don't really have romantic or lust feelings for him, but I know he is older and experienced and that if he was my first, I would feel safe and happy (yes, I am a virgin).
Should I go to him for safety and peace of mind, or should I wait for romance and new relationships to come along? I will probably wait because I still do believe in romance and I'm not of a person of easy virtue. Talking with another friend gave me even more resolve to wait. After all it should really mean something, shouldn't it? I will definitely wait.
I guess I'm asking this to hear what you all (gay dudes) think about it and just to know how you felt about all this for your first time and what it was like. any words of advice for a lovelorn young man? LOL to sum it up, which is better, romance or security?
2006-07-31 08:36:35 · 8 answers · asked by Mr. Fancy Pants 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You've asked a very thoughtful question. So many people, gay and straight worry about their "first time" and that they should maybe go with a safe older, experienced person at first, so that when it really means something, it'll be more practiced, better sex.
I disagree with that premise. I agree with you that your first time should be special. So if your first time is a Little hesitant, or in need of polish, it's a compliment to your first lover, that you saved it for this special moment. If he cares about you, the two of you will work through your (and perhaps his) initial clumsiness and get to a point where sex is great, and it will be because the two of you made it that way.
2006-07-31 10:22:24 · answer #1 · answered by michael941260 5 · 10⤊ 1⤋
Its a toss up. He is being very kind for you. If you know you would feel safe and happy -- then I don't think its a bad idea to have a go with him.
I suspect that you will find romance to be less than you thought -- unless you are very lucky though.
My first time was with my best friend when we were 13 (I may have been JUST 14, I don't remember exactly anymore). We were wrestling, he was h**d, I felt it pushing into my side and well... I lost control. We had sex regularly for years after that.
Peace.
Reyn
believeinyou24@yahoo.com
2006-07-31 16:02:13 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Men, you are saying that your are going to sleep with a guy just because you fell some how great full, no no no dude,,, if you say that him helped you a lot, that's not the way to pay men,,,, and please,,,,, for safety,,,, come on dude......you know the answer,,,, wait to loose your virginity to a guy who you really love and like....
2006-07-31 15:59:04 · answer #3 · answered by snorlax72 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait. You will do NO ONE favors by having your first act with him, certainly NOT him. He may have feelings for you that will go much further if you have sex with him...that would be very unkind to him. He has been there for you. And as far a anal sex goes, I would CERTAINLY hope that it would be someone you were terribly in love with. Oral...who cares.
2006-07-31 17:52:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think you answered your own question best. Wait for a relationship with someone that you really like.
2006-07-31 15:58:35 · answer #5 · answered by mgrboy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go for the romance that way you end up with the whole package.
2006-07-31 16:13:21 · answer #6 · answered by Student123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm just 19 so I don't know if this is a mature advise....
I think romance.
Your friend seems hot! But if you don't love him, then wait until you find someone whom you love.
BTW, maybe I can be your first.............
2006-07-31 15:56:58 · answer #7 · answered by vkrum1900 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wait for the one you want babe youve got plenty of time
2006-07-31 16:16:09 · answer #8 · answered by Bearable 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋