few months back i cheated on my wife she found out and now she is...?

Question

She is cheating on me with my best friend , what should i do i thought that she forgived me and i was really sorry about my cheating i told here how sorry i was i really love her but now how should i react to this situation ?

i Know i made a mistake but when i thought i will loss her i really regret that and i told her i was really sorry about it i cannot imagine my life without her .

Answer 1

well she is obviously giving you a taste of what she pass trough when you cheated on her , now you should talk to her and make a decision if you will continuo with her or each f you get a different life , also its wrong what you did but its more wrong what she is doing now t you .. let her explain to you .

Answer 2

What is it that you are complaining about? This doesn't mean she didn't 'forgive' you, at least as much as anyone can be forgiven for a betrayal of that magnitude, she's just letting you know exactly how it feels so you think long and hard before doing it again. She also wants to make you aware that if you can do it so can she so think about that before you do whatever you do. This is the way its supposed to be, if he can do it so can she, in EVERYTHING, you were partners.

You obviously don't have any grasp of the damage you have really done or you wouldn't be here saying....i said i'm sorry so whats her problem! This takes YEARS to recover from, you may be forgiven but it is NEVER forgotten, everytime you are 3 minutes late getting home its right there on top of her mind. It takes a lot more than sorry and I love you to make this right, you say that and what goes through her mind is if you loved me you wouldn't have done it and you are sorry you got caught not sorry you got laid. You apologize thousands of times until your behavior in the rest of the areas in your life quiet down the answer in her head. A few months does nothing to heal a wound this deep.

I've had this policy in place for years, if you do it to me I can guarantee you the same in return, only you are going to sit here and be fully aware of exactly what i'm doing all night long. It's been very effective so far. My advice, don't do things to people that you don't want done to you in return because apparently that is the way your wife believes it should be. However, enough is enough. So its time to say ok we are even, if you are, I mean did you have sex with a girl once or did you have an ongoing affair? They are very different things and the penalties for them are very different. Anyway, if you are even say that, tell her its time to stop and apologize again for what you did, tell her you thought you had made it right with her but now you understand that she was nowhere close to ok and you apologize for not understanding that. You find a new best friend, this one isn't worth a pint of pee. Then you continue on in talking to your wife and try to decide if there is any future left for the two of you and what it is going to take to get it back on track if there is and if there isn't to make the arrangments to go your separate ways.

Answer 3

First you should pray for your marriage to get better and you should ask her to consider marriage counseling to try to save your marriage. You need a professional to help you with this because you must of really shattered her heart and deeply hurt her if she is now sleeping with your best friend. I don't mean to sound harsh but when you do someone wrong, Karma has a way of evening the score. The issue with your best friend, I think he seen that you had a good thing better than you seeing it. I would talk to the both of them in a counseling session. Good luck. If you are truly sorry and don't cheat on her ever again, then I hope things work out.

Answer 4

some friend? I think you should consider how she was hurting. What made her result to this action, or, was she doing this all along.People don't always think about their actions/ reactions to a situation. It goes along with that old saying,"what if the shoe was on the other foot,". Are you really sorry to find out she's cheating or that its with your best freind. If you really are sorry, try to find a way to make the relationship work.In the long run "two wrongs don't make a right!" you both were wrong to break the trust in your marriage.

Answer 5

She cheated in reaction of what you did to her. She wanted to make you feel as she felt when you stray. This is not ver healthy, but what can you do, things are the way they are and saying that it's your fault because you did it first is pointless.

You both are hurt and obviuosly you both made a mistake. You for straying and her for seeking revenge, if you want to make things work then you should have a heart to heart talk. You have to apologize and free your heart from grudges. If you are able to forgive her and if she wants to forgive you then you have a chance, Marriage counseling can help you both heal and get past beyond this.
Perhaps, this was necesary in order to make the adjustments in your marraige that needed to take place. If you both love each other, then offer and accept apologies, without holding on to the pain.

Remember the song "Human" by Human League? The lyrics may inspire you. It's about a man asking for forgiveness when cheating and then she says that she forgives him, but she asks for him to do the same, as she cheated too when they were separated. hera are the lyrics:
Come on, baby, dry your eyes
Wipe your tears
Never like to see you cry
Won't you please forgive me ?

I wouldn't ever try to hurt you
I just needed someone to hold me
To fill the void while you were gone
To fill this space of emptiness

I'm only human
Of flesh and blood I'm made
Human
Born to make mistakes

So many nights I longed to hold you
So many times I looked and saw your face
Nothing could change the way I feel
No-one else could ever take your place

I'm only human
Of flesh and blood I'm made
Human
Born to make mistakes

I am just a man

Please forgive me

The tears I cry aren't tears of pain
They're only to hide my guilt and shame
I forgive you now I ask the same of you
While we were apart I was human too

I'm only human
Of flesh and blood I'm made
I am just a man
Human
Born to make mistakes

---------------------------

Good luck

Answer 6

I lost a marriage to this exact scenario. Look, you brought it upon yourself. Ride it out and let go.. Your only reaping what you harvested. Your best friend was on the move before you even knew it. She was subject to that as well. It takes more than just circumstance for them to get together. let me tell you something friend. Your kindness and sincerity's have redeemed you. Now, she is lower than you. Your friend is a coward and a weasel. She not only lowered you but she pulled a severe B**** move against you. Let them enjoy each other and you move on and find someone to love and DONT make the same mistake twice. Keep your friends distanced and your next lover should be your best friend. Trust me guy, she or any woman is not worth the pain. Your only making yourself look like a fool and she is thriving off of that, now you will know that women are not play things. They are very powerful and know how to destroy someone who has really hurt them.. Now you must respect,cherish and pamper women. now you see why they are more strategic, and wittier than men

Answer 7

have a 3-some

Answer 8

You poooooor guy. Just because you cheated, you're having problems. What should you do? Well, divorce seems reasonable. Perhaps you will grow up and learn that when you betray, you pay. As you should. But, you asked how you should react. Perhaps your wife feels things will be better IF she hurts you, which is why she picked your "friend". She might come back. So, just let her rub your nose in HER affair, and hope she decides tio come back to you.

Answer 9

You really had it coming. Cheating on her was the biggest mistake of your life, and now she's making sure you know it.

But, I would kick your friend in the n*ts. No guy that's really your 'best friend' would sleep with your wife, no matter what the circumstances.

Answer 10

Your sorry you got caught you ain't sorry you cheated now she is getting her swerve on.you should be kicking you best friend to the curb.he should be loyal to you.........why your at it.kick her to the curb cause once you get to this point it isn't a marriage its a contest to see who will file for divorce and cause as much drama as possible. Man up.apologise and pack your stuff move on and learn from your mistakes.

Answer 11

Lifes a b*tch...women never forgive...we get back...this is why I tell my husband to never cheat on me,,,forget the best friend I going for the brother....