2006-07-31 04:56:21 · 12 answers · asked by bryanjcohen 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
Curious, what are the "etiquette" rules for a guy who wants to show he is top, bottom, versatile, when going to a gay disco?
2006-07-31 04:56:56 · update #1
Curious, what are the "etiquette" rules for a guy who wants to show he is top, bottom, versatile, when going to a gay disco? I hear there is a way you can show it, like wearing a bandana in a back pocket or some crap like that. I want to know so I avoid getting into situations where I meet someone and we don;t mesh with our preferences.
2006-07-31 05:03:23 · update #2
A lot of it has to do with personality. I guess how confident you are allows men to make assumptions about you, though you know as well as I know that there are a lot of confident bottoms too. If you're going to approach someone and you have sex on the brain, it probably would be best to just tell them you're a top, no hidden signals needed.
2006-07-31 05:05:37 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
You can google "the hanky code" if you want, but...that's kind of old-timey. Not too many in the younger crowd will know what it means. Personally, I'd go "oh. wow. the hanky code" and know what it was, but not what it meant.
Generally, I don't make assumptions about anyone else at all until we end up talking about it. Which, if it's a casual hookup, can happen relatively early. That having been said, if someone's standing around with their bottom displayed like a flagging dog, you might guess they're a bottom. And if they're in the cowboy pose with legs crossed, leaning against a doorframe, or if they've got one leg up pointed at you while talking, you might GUESS they're a top. But both of these may very well prove to be inaccurate; they are just guesses.
2006-08-01 23:09:22 · answer #2 · answered by Atropis 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is a code called the "hanky code" where guys wear different coloured bandannas in their rear pocket. Basically the left pocket is for tops and the right pocket for bottoms, and the various colours tell of what sexual activity is your favourite.
The codes are not used as widely today as they once were, and if you have a hanky in your pocket, you may have guys scrambling to find out what it means. For instance a light blue hanky in your left pocket means you're looking for someone to please you orally, while the same hanky in the right pocket means you'd get on your knees and please him that way. Just in case you're interest, I put a link to one version of the code below.
I think if you just conduct yourself in a masculine way, and ask guys for phone numbers, or to dance, etc, but don't swoon over them or appear desperate, they'll assume you might be top, and then when you get with somebody, you can work out the details.
Very few guys are exclusively top, though some are. Just get to know a guy before you worry about what he likes in bed. It's all good.
2006-07-31 12:27:10 · answer #3 · answered by michael941260 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The best way is to open your mouth and talk. Hanky codes are generally used only by the leather/bear/fetish crowd. If you are looking for more info in that area, I have a posting of generally accepted colors and sides for hankies (www.geocities.com/mresl2005 go to the hanky page link). One thing to remember thouh, is that the hanky code is not absolute and what means one thing in your hometown may mean something entirely different down the road.
2006-07-31 12:15:24 · answer #4 · answered by mresl2005 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hanky codes are one way....but only people who know the code....would know your preference.
Probaly your best bet would be get one of those shirts off ebay that says "I'm ______ and I'm a Top" or bottom or versatile or whatever......
2006-08-03 23:00:51 · answer #5 · answered by Chad 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I once saw a guy with a wife-beater shirt on that said "pitcher".
I say just talk to people. Be confident.
2006-07-31 12:35:23 · answer #6 · answered by Becky 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Pretty easy. If someone likes the looks of you, it'll be one of the first things they ask you.
2006-08-01 01:34:48 · answer #7 · answered by Will 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hanky codes or keys..but I think they're a little outdated..If it's that important talk to him before you go home with him.
2006-07-31 12:22:03 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I wear a t-shirt that says "TOP" on the front.
2006-07-31 13:12:11 · answer #9 · answered by Kookoo Bananas 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you'll want to be the agressive one in approaching someone
2006-07-31 12:00:32 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋