i got two questions in one....
1}~ i had unprotected sex with a "friend" a day after my period stopped. it got kinda rough and i spotted for a few days after it. now, my breasts are tender, i am noisated, vomiting, and my tummy is rock solied. my period is not due for another week, what are the chances that i am preganct?
2}~ we have been friends for 8 years. he had a daughter that he did not know about until she died at 18 months. he has been heartbroken about it for a while now. he wants kids. two days after we had sex, he got back with his ex-girlfriend, who will not let us talk. although, we still talk if i show up at his work (he is a bouncer on the weekend at a club i like to go to) and she is not there yet. he is facing drug charges and might be going to prison for 2 to 15 years. (i do not do drugs, the charges were before our night.) should i tell him? or should i keep it to myself?
2006-07-31 02:43:37 · 22 answers · asked by bubblez_cb 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Pregnancy
i think you are preganct.iam a cna all that you having maybe you are preg.if you are you should tell him. he has to know b/c if he lost the other baby maybe this baby will make him happy again. dont worry what his girlfriend would say they were not together so f her dont matter what please keep your baby he or she did not choose to came in to this world.
2006-07-31 03:21:52 · answer #1 · answered by saraipalacios1 1 · 3⤊ 1⤋
First find out, because you really can't do anything till you know for sure.
Second, my friend is going thru this same thing. But her situation is a little different. YOU and ONLY you know for sure what is going on in your life. You know if he is going to be excited about this or disappointed. You are friends but having a baby from him that was unplanned can change a lot of things. Especially if he is disappointed with what happened. We all know that guy never think of the consequences of sticking and poking they only think of the pleasures of the moment. So YOU need to evaluate the situation. Considering the situation of him going to jail for the next 15 years has a big factor, he really can't contribute to the child's life. Sometimes the best thing to do is just wait and see. Whatever happens, if you do decided to keep this to yourself then there are programs out there that will help you financially get thru this. Mothers have been raising children by themselves since the beginning of time. You can do it too. But find out first, all this stress could be for nothing. Oh about the ex, she has nothing to do with this. Its obvious that she threatened by you, and has some issues of her own. So don't even think about what is going on with her.
Good luck. I hope only the best for you.
And I hope that you have other family and friends to help support.
2006-07-31 05:05:22 · answer #2 · answered by mersades4vr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The most important advice to give you is make sure you are pregnant. You don't want to cause more problems in his or your life with an " I might be pregnant scenario" which might include his ex and cause you problems.
If you are in fact pregnant then you should see if you both can have lunch together and let him know. If he is acceptable and wants to be responsible discuss the plans for the child if he goes to jail. Also, if he hasn't had a court date yet then you can present this information to the judge and he may let him go with probation and community service. Now it is important that you both realize that it is very costly for both a child and getting in trouble with the law. So make sure he is aware that you want him to be drug free around your child because you don't want anything to happen to him/her. All it takes is one incident for the government to take your child away from you. I know this is a lot so take it one step at a time and find out if you're pregnant then go from there. vsherlock7334@charter.net
2006-07-31 03:20:35 · answer #3 · answered by Young Mommy 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just take a test and find out for sure. Learn from this experience and carry condoms YOURSELF! No wrappy - no tappy!
As for telling him, weigh out the good points and bad points. Would he make a good father? Would he be willing to clean up his act to do it? If he's in jail for 15 years, what will that do to the child? Etc..........
Personally, I would tell him. But only AFTER I'd had a test from a DOCTOR and knew for sure that I was DEFINATELY pregnant. Let him make the choice. You obviously feel that he is a good person to have remained friends with him for 8 years. He's had this done to him once and you've witnessed the heartbreak he's experienced from it. I think he has a right to know. After all, you obviously thought enough of him to lay down with him and have sex. You should think enough of him to be honest with you.
Good luck, hun, I hope everything works out for you.
2006-07-31 04:11:15 · answer #4 · answered by Ken'sBabe 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1) You may be pregnant, but at the same time all symptoms of pregnancy can get other things as well. I know my friend though she was pregnant and then got her period a week later.
2) I would tell him even if he does have to go to Jail.
2006-07-31 02:49:39 · answer #5 · answered by tigergirl301 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him about it. Hes got alot of issues right now but I would get checked first to be for sure. It dont matter who this girl is that ex If shes mature she would let you guys talk. Having a guys child he may decide to break it off with her and go with you. Mainly because your having his child. Their isn't anything that ex has that you dont have. Ask god to help work these things out. Maybe it will work out for you to be with him you never know.
Goodluck**
2006-07-31 02:52:46 · answer #6 · answered by girl176a1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would first take a pregnancy test to know for sure whether or not you are pregnant. If you are, then you have to tell him to at least give him the chance to be a father. If not, then I wouldnt worry him with the what ifs. Don't say anything unless you are sure that you are. Good luck!
2006-07-31 02:49:27 · answer #7 · answered by peachy4995 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I dont know the chances that u r pregnant sound like higher.. Did u do a pregnancy test by now? U should... I dont know I think you should consider for yourself how good it is to let him know. Only you know the situation you guys are in, but you will decide whats right for you..
2006-07-31 03:02:18 · answer #8 · answered by sweetheartk21 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think i would tell him. I can also honestly say I might not tell him cause I think it will damage the kid more than you know? You know you have very taste in men; what a role model he would be to your kid if it is his? It will harder on the kid to know that his father is in prision for drugs??? Now what does that say about the mom?? I know the truth hurts, but when kids are involved, things need to be said.
2006-07-31 02:52:35 · answer #9 · answered by kram_7777 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes
2006-07-31 03:00:43 · answer #10 · answered by Stephanie M 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take a pregnancy test first. If you're pregnant, tell him. If you're not pregnant, there is no need to involve him.
I hope everything works out for the best.
2006-07-31 02:50:32 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋