I am working my way through college writing fortunes to put in Chinese Fortune Cookies. It is the beginning of my junior year and I'm burned out!! I've written over 4 million fortunes in the past two years--NO TWO ALIKE! The owner--Willie Fu Chu--requires each one to be different!!
I'm bone dry! I'll never get to be a neuro-surgeon if I don't pick up production!! How many ways can you tell somebody to wait for an inheritance? Or expect love unexpectedly from a tall handsome whatever?? Or that your car engine may blow up next month and to rush to have it inspected??
I've even stooped to foretelling phases of the moon (frowned on by Willie as cheating), copying from Nostradamus (takes really small type to get on those silly tiny strips of paper), telling one number of the lottery, and telling people they will die for sure before the age of 165 (cheating, again, said Willie).
HELP ME BECOME A NEUROSURGEON. SUGGEST FORTUNES FOR ME TO USE!!!
No, I do not practice witchcraft. NO!
2006-07-30 15:55:07 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Business & Finance ➔ Careers & Employment
Oh, Lees - don't lose heart. You can do it; look at what you've accomplished so far -- 4 million fortunes!! Willie Fu Chu is a hard taskmaster. It's dangerous giving negative fortunes -- and besides you'll give people indigestion (which would only be useful to you if you're switching your medical specialty to internal medicine).
You can go through the physical gamut with: "a silent tongue will rarely lie", "Gritted teeth cannot be brushed", "A stiff arm is unbending", "A crooked finger may be arthritis", "A bent knee does not guarantee a proposal"; using your extensive knowledge as a medical student.
Then you can switch to the philosophical (which is expected anyway): "If you do something right the first time, no one will appreciate how difficult it was" or, if you're feeling feisty or it's an especially bad day, you can write "If you take an open-book exam, you will forget your book" or "when you order take-out, it will be burned" or "you will attract uncultured people to your home" or "An empty pizza box will sadden your morning". You can't stay negative, though, or Willie will whine.
Then the practical: "Now is a good time to get your tires checked" or "now is a good time to scrape the jello off the bottom shelf of your refrigerator" or "old lettuce gathers no moss", "An old goat can still chew your furniture."
When you run out of these, head for the Yellow Pages, and just give a little free advertising to your local merchants: "Al's Autobody - (681) 726-8418", "Fred's Fine Dining - (212) 555-1212". It won't be as exciting, but it will fill those cookies, cookie.
Tell Willie you need a percentage of the profits to put aside for medical school - and that's no MSG!
2006-07-31 06:08:19 · answer #1 · answered by Serena 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Don't take wooden nickels, dimes or quarters.
If you get "it", go to the doctor and get rid of it.
Don't trust a whitey.
2006-07-30 16:28:23 · answer #2 · answered by light bulb 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
LISTEN TO WHAT YOUR HEART TELLS YOU, WHAT A CLOSE FRIEND TELLS YOU, WHAT A RANDOM STRANGER TELLS YOU.
GO BUY THAT LOTTO TICKET
TAKE A CHANCE ON THAT JOB, LOVER, FRIEND, SISTER, BROTHER, ETC.
2006-07-30 16:03:37 · answer #3 · answered by Work-N-Hrd-2-Mk-It 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
uhhh....How about....nope, I'm tapped out too.
Man with hole in pocket feel cocky all day. How about that one??
2006-07-30 15:59:24 · answer #4 · answered by Starry 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋