help please i'm soo lost?

Question

for a little over one year do i love him or is it just a fling. i think of him every day and night i pray that he is doing ok when i can't get a hold of him. when we get to talk on line we talk until he has to go to work or i have to go to school normal we talk for no less than 5 hours at a time. i wish i could see him every day but his job wont let me so i live with it. he is older than me and if my mom found out how much i would not be allowed to see him. he doesn't know that i havent' told them his true age. but he wont' stand for it.. he tells me if they say something he will just tell them that he has fallin for me. and won't let me go. please help

i'm 17 and my mom is like you and he says school is more important than he is so if my grades get low than it won't work out

people listen he doesn't know i lied to my mom. and they dont' know i'm lying. they like him but he had to leave to iraq before they met him. and if he know i lied he would be pissed offf

Answer 1

I imagine you will get many answers like this, but you are young and you have so much time to fall in love. There is something wrong when the person who says they love you will not even respect your parents (the people who loved you first, clothed, fed, cared for you and brought you into this world) unless they agree with him being with you.

I dated much older men when I was way too young - people will get grossed out (and they should), but I was with some guy that was 14 years older than me when I was very young - lets just say I wasn't old enough to drive yet. And guess what none of them ever worked out - yeah I thought it was love, the MEN probably thought it was sex (or even worse). I am now married with 4 kids and a college degree, my husband is only 2 years older than me and it works well - we have much more in common than if there was a huge age gap.

Sorry for lecturing, but take care of YOU - if you do continue this, please do not CUT your parents out of your life and as I am sure you know be SAFE.

Answer 2

If you are under 25 then you are too young....this is why I dont allow my kids to date...i have 20 year old and she still cant date...she's way to immature...you get so involved emotionally with these people that when you do break up its like a divorce...hun if his work wont allow him and he's older than you dont you think that maybe just maybe he's married..???? It sounds like it to me that he is...I would be carful find something to do that will occupy your time like doing stuff after school hanging out with friends things like that...be a teachers aide in a preschool help out in sunday school get a job locally babysitting or if your 16 then a job period....but please plz plz dont fall for this guy right now keep your head up and I will tell you something do this my dad told me this once if you can stay away from each other for ten days and then after ten days go back to talking to each other again and you missed each other so much it hurt then maybe something is there....if he is older too I would watch it cuz there is a law against that....and sweetie talk to your mom ok dont leave her in the dark....wait a minute how come she doesnt know ur online for hours a day????? my kids only get 30 min each....whats up???? hmmmm somethings fishy here

Answer 3

ok - sounds like you are young and if you are scared to talk to your mom - something is not right. Any healthy relationship that has to be hidden or kept secret is not good. I know your not going going to like what I'm saying, but hours and hours on the phone with someone is not love - I'd take a step back and breath - take care of yourself and spend time with friends - you'll grow up sooner than you think - enjoy your youth.

Answer 4

This is puppy love, and its normal. If you are not honest with your parents, they will lose the trust that they have in you!!!!! I also think this is wrong as you maybe under age and this man is a pervert!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!