Problems with the baby nurses and after delivery nurses...has this happened to you?

Question

I feel like I always have a fairly good experience with the nurses while I'm in labor and delivery. But the nurses who take care of me and my baby afterwards always rub me the wrong way. Is this typical and does it happen a lot? They always seem pushy and not very understanding. Plus they always want to take my baby to the nursery and give them formula when I specifically say not too. Which has caused problems in the past. Then after making me stay in the hospital for what seems like forever, all at once they are rushing me to leave. I'm frustrated, and this is the biggest thing I'm not looking forward to during my upcoming delivery.

Answer 1

I had similar feeling after my baby (first and only). Looking back I would have done some things differently;
- Communicate with the nurses ahead of time my desires, (ie. exclusive breastfeeding),
- Reason with nurses, say what I wanted and why I wanted it, and be more clear about my needs and,
- Try to come to compromise with nurses, what is or isn't possible for them to do (or not do),
- if that doesn't work ask partner to step in to advocate.

This is mighty hard with no sleep, pain and demands of new baby!

Hope this helps

Answer 2

I had the same problem. I have switched to another hospital because of it. I'm due to have a baby any day and am praying I don't experience that again. I had a difficult time breastfeeding and the nurses would give my son a pacifyer or formula behind my back. This time, I have instructed my husband to enforce my wishes in the event I am unable. Also, I don't care whose feeling I may hurt, I plan to be much more vocal about my wishes this time around. I even made up some little signs to attach to the baby's nursery crib that say "no pacifyers", and "no formula" just as a reminder. It seems to me that the nurses in the nursery sometimes will do whatever is necessary to quiet a fussy baby. I guess it could get pretty annoying for them, but hey, that's their job. I'm just going to request the baby stay in my room as much as possible.

Answer 3

I've never given birth, so that's never happened to me, but my friends have had similar experiences. I think that the nurses see so many deliveries that they forget that this is a special and unique experience for the new mother. They tend to think that they know more than the mothers (which they probably do), but every new mother will want things done differently, and different is not wrong. My friend 's baby was sent to the ICU because she wasn't eating. She had a cleft lip/palate and had to be fed a certain way. The nurses would not listen and claimed the baby was failing to thrive. My friend had done a ton of research before the baby was born and was enraged that they would not listen to her. She wound up getting up every three hours, going to the ICU, and feeding her baby, which did so much better.
The important thing to remember is that the nurses don't have to be your friends. Be polite, but insist that they listen to your requests. Don't feel rushed to leave if you are not ready, inversely, if you don't feel there is a medical reason for you to stay, talk to your doctor and see if you can get released. Not only are you the patient, but you are the customer, and with the high cost of medical care, I would insist on good service.
Hope this helps!

Answer 4

If you can imagine, I'm an L&D nurse delivering at the hospital that I work at and was a c-section, and once I was in post-partum care some of the nurses would ignore me!! These are women that I come into contact with on a regular basis!!

Evidently I should have known how to take care of myself, 4 hours post surgery.

Like everywhere you get the good with the bad unfortunely.
Ask for another nurse, it's your right or when you go in let your nurse know that you have had some terrible experiences in the past.

Answer 5

My last birth was terrible. They took my daughter from me at 3:00am after I said no...she was just three hours old and I had noticed that she had a little bit of a breathing glitch when she fell in to a deep sleep. I mentioned this and begged them to let me keep her, but they kept insisting that she go with them and that they would bring her back in less than an hour. They really wouldn't even let me come down because they said I needed my sleep and it was so early in the morning. I fell asleep and when I woke up it was 6:30am and my baby was not back. I went down to the nurses station and asked where she was...oh my goodness....they had finished tests, brought her back to me, but didn't want to wake me so they took her back to the nursery...GRRRRRRR!!!! Well, while she was there a nurse JUST HAPPENED (and let me stress HAPPENED!!!!) to walk by and noticed that she was gray and not BREATHING!!!!! They did revive her, but she was very close to the point of death!!!!! No heart beat!!!! I was so MAD!!!!! I knew that she needed to be with me and they took her and disregarded my telling them about the breathing glitch. While she was sleeping with me skin to skin I would just rub her back when I noticed her breathing strangely and she would snap right out of it. Needless to say I am pregnant with my third and I am having a homebirth with a certified nurse midwife. No one will take my baby from me this time and if there is a true medical emergency I live less than 10 minutes from the hospital and a block away from the fire station.

Answer 6

It sounds like you may need to speak with your doctor or either the head nurse. Of course give them an opportunity to treat you well first. After I delivered the nurses were great. They helped teach me to breastfeed and helped my son latch on. They only came in my room when they had to take vitals or take my son to the nursery to check on him. Never did they try to bottle feed him. I had it specifically noted in my birth plan-no bottles or pacifiers. They respected my wishes well. I would definitely talk to someone if you have problems. You're paying for it, and they're there to help you. If they make you feel uncomfortable, complain to the right person or tell that specific nurse to stay out of your room.

Answer 7

Yes this is fairly common,

can't you just spend the night and then come home?

I think those nurses know everything about newborns and they expect you to know everything too, wheather this is you first kid or 4th. They may just want the baby in the nursey to make their job of monitoring the baby and giving it all those shots and blood tests easier and maybe you're supposed to rest during those times but why don't they say so a bit kinder?

Answer 8

I live in Australia so it's a little different here. The giving of formula by midwives without a written consent by parents didn't happen. As for the pacifier (or dummy as we Aussie's call them) we had to bring our own in if we wanted our babies to use them). They also encourage mother and baby bonding here. Unless the baby needs to be watched the baby will sleep next to the mothers bed.
After I had my 1st daughter there was one midwife who I hated. I was having problems breast feeding due to the fact it was my 1st time being a mummy and she was having trouble latching due to her birthing experience and since she had to learn to. Anyway, this midwife had me in tears one night. She made me feel so bad cos I couldn't breastfeed my baby after she had shown me many times. I dreaded pressing the nurse call button incase she came into my room. I tried for an hr or so before I called anyone. In the end both bubs and I worked it out.
I had a very pleasant experience after I had my 2nd baby. I went private this time and we were living in a different city. Everything ran so smoothly. I'm now 8wks and looking forward to going to hospital to have my baby in the hospital I had #2.

Answer 9

your hormones are way out of whack after pregnancy and you are prone to be all irritable, nurses are trained to educate and allow you rest as well. Just make sure your wishes are known and they will back off, and when it's time to leave they get that way sometimes because some other mom is now in need of the room . Don't take it too personal just speak up for yourself without being rude.

Answer 10

Sounds like you should find another hospital. I live in the Denver area and will only continue to have my babies at one hospital. I think some of them have a better staff than others. I loved my nurses but have friends who delivered at other hospitals and hated theirs. Can you look into another hospital?