my man has shared with me that he has been with another man before like maybe on 2 or 3 occassions ..he said it was along tiem ago and that he likes women....It doesnt bother me in the least but does this mean he is bi or in the closet will he cheat with another man?? you know hes asked me the strangest questions about my ex's too...like how big was thier you know what??
2006-07-30 12:06:52 · 32 answers · asked by Jenny 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
You know, although most men will deny it, most men have actually fooled around to some extent with other men. (Ok guys, start shooting me down, but Kinsey reported it even in the 1950's.)
Men don't like such an assault on masculinity it seems. I think you are pretty fortunate to have a husband who confided truthfully in you. Most of us fall somewhere in between the extreme of totally heterosexual and totally homosexual. Because of the strong cultural taboo against being homosexual, though, most of us can't even allow ourselves to think about going 'round the bend.
The question for your husband might really be, would he rather be with a man than with you. Probably not, or he would have already done so.
I wouldn't worry about it. You might have an opportunity to try out fantasies of your own, which I doubt need to be detailed here, but might involve more than one sexual partner at a time.
2006-07-30 12:14:39 · answer #1 · answered by lowerbearville 6 · 14⤊ 4⤋
Well hmm. I Guess it depends... was there something that influenced his decision to sleep with another guy in the past? I mean sometthing like being under the influence of drugs or alcohol.. something that might cause him to make decisions that were uncharictaristic of him? And is he at all attracted to other men sexually? One can be bi or even gay without ever having had sex at all or even only having had sex with a traditional partner. A man can be in a straight relationship and prefer women most of the time and still be bi... its not so much about who you actually sleep with, then what goes on inside the head or heads LOL as may be the case. And just because he has slept with another man before doesnt mean hes Bi... Most people experiment at some point in their lives in some type of way.. So really your b/f is the person you need to be asking these questions... because only he knows the answers.
I suggest you reasure him ( if its true it doesnt bother you ) that you're ok with it, if he is bi... be open with him and tell him your fears and trust him untill given a reason not to... and I would assume he will eventually be able to trust you enough to share his feelings with, if its the type of relationship that he feels might last.
2006-07-30 14:59:21 · answer #2 · answered by Levi Cristopher . 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Same here. My guy has been with three other men and had a boyfriend for a month (this was a long time ago). He's certain that he's not gay, so I trust him. It's up to him to decide if he's Bi or not. He's says he isn't, but that's a gray area. He has asked me if I would feel like he cheated on me if he had sex with a man again and I said yes, so he said he won't. He says that I am enough for him, but he was just wondering. As for your original question, it doesn't really turn me on, but there wouldn't be anything wrong with you if it did. I think it's weird that I'm turned on thinking about my guy with other women....
2006-07-30 12:11:29 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If your man had been with other women before, would this worry you that he'd cheat with other women?
The fact that he might be bi, doesn't make him a cheater. His character, gay straight or bi, could make him a cheater, or not.
Now, I will have to say, if he's been with three guys, and asks about the sizes of guys you've been with before, my best guess would be that he isn't straight. But I have no judgement about whether or not he would cheat.
2006-07-30 14:51:59 · answer #4 · answered by michael941260 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he 'experimented' sexually guys when he was younger does not mean he is gay, or even bi. It means he was curious and experimented - end of story. It also does not mean that he is going to cheat on you with another man. Sounds to me as if he is trying to be honest with you about his past. I hope you can be equally as honest with him in telling you how you feel about this. Better to deal with it now rather than years later into the relationship.
2006-07-30 14:45:21 · answer #5 · answered by rp_iowa 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he cheats on you , it would not make a difference if it was with a man or woman. Str8s and gays both share that fear. Neither one of you were virgins ( I'm guessing) so your past history is not too important. If he would have preferd gays then he probably would have stayed that way.If he has told you this and you have had sex with him since , then you are not that upset. A lot depends on how much ya'll love each other
2006-07-30 13:03:28 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nope, means nothing. But he is asking about size to see if he stacks up against your other partners...men have the stupidest insecurities, and this is one of them. Means nothing as to being bi, gay, or straight. IF the truth were known, every straight man would want to know that he is the biggest, greatest sex partner you have ever had...most have to settle for something less. Good luck
2006-07-30 14:30:46 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
He's probably bi. And if you aren't worried about him cheating on you with a woman, you shouldn't be worried about him cheating with a man. As for the size matter, that's just typical male insecurity on his part.
2006-07-30 15:04:03 · answer #8 · answered by me41987 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is probably bi, or at least there is a good indication he is.
Be glad that he is trusting enough of you to be honest. Let him know that you don't have a problem with it and that you appreciate his honesty. He may have more to tell and is just feeling you out to see what your going to say.
2006-07-30 21:21:07 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Being a bisexual doesn't mean the guy is going to cheat on you.
He was probably just curious though, when he was young, and now really doesn't like it and would rather women, I've heard a lot about guys like that.
2006-07-30 12:54:14 · answer #10 · answered by Adam G 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
ask him bout it. tell him that ur confused and u wanna noe whether or not hell cheat on u. if u confront him bout it then ull be heartbroken wen u find out.
good luck and if he is bi or does cheat on u get urself a man thatll love u, not some other woman or man
2006-07-30 12:12:16 · answer #11 · answered by michelleee♥ 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋