my husband cheated on me and i took him back everything is wounderful now but i just cant stop think about what he did to me how wrong it was and sometimes i fill like doing it back to him and i know thats wrong how can i more on and forget about it it been 6months already
2006-07-30 12:03:49 · 16 answers · asked by queenbee 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Apparently, You two never really got this thing resolved, and because of this, You're still living with it. You need to discuss what happened again with him, and really get the answers your looking for, and get everything about it off your chest. If You find that He doesn't want to talk about it, or go into it in any way... then this is going to stay a problem... and trust Me from My own Experiences, it's never gonna stop eating at You! This kind of thing can go on for years if You let it... so don't... get it out now.
2006-07-30 12:10:16 · answer #1 · answered by M L 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It sounds to me that you are sorry now for taking him back. Believe me, cheating on him is no more then revenge and is no better than what he did to you. Cheating on him wont make you feel better nor will it harm him so forget it. You cant live with this act of infidelity. You feel betrayed,belittled and keep wondering if it could happen again. Normal feelings but that doesnt help. At this point in time, your best bet would be to divorce him and sue him for everything you can legally get and move on the best you can. Time will heal you. He will soon know whatb he had exactly once youre gone. Good luck
2006-07-30 19:20:27 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My husband cheated on me too. I know the feelings that you are going through. Until you have every fact about it, it will haunt you. 6 months is not long enough. You are still recovering. It takes time to give the trust back that he so easily lost, because of the affair. You cannot just forget. But, since you both want to work on getting your marriage and love back on track, please visit this site for really valuable help:
http://www.marriagebuilders.com
Join their discussion forum. There are many people going through it there and maybe you will find some help for the both of you.
2006-07-30 19:24:19 · answer #3 · answered by Twisted Maggie 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have already taken the first steps in the healing process you - have taken back your husband and have forgiven him. You may never entirely forget what has happened. Maybe it is right and proper that a memory still remains for both of you in order to maintain and build a trust between you. Your husband may be truly sorry for the wrong he did to you, but he must constantly prove he is worthy of your forgiveness and love. In turn, your gracious acceptance of his renewed love will strengthen the bond between you. It may be a cliche, but time is a great healer.
2006-07-30 19:25:48 · answer #4 · answered by »»» seagull ««« 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are a legend. For your own sake try to put it out of your mind. Doing the same thing will only hurt you again. Forgetting about it does not mean all is OK, it just means you want to move on and not let it hurt you any more
2006-07-30 19:09:55 · answer #5 · answered by VL MAN 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are still having thoughts of revenge... you will never forget. But just remember it's not always the best thing to forget.....forgive him yes but, forget no. You just make sure you watch your back. My mama always said "**** on me once, sham on you. **** on my twice and sham on me." Tell him how you are feeling....if blows up and can't seem to understand why you brought it back up....leave him and get a man who knows better. But if he tells you he loves you and wants to make it work no matter what, then you have your answer. Stay with him and try and work it out.
2006-07-30 19:11:07 · answer #6 · answered by Erik R 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Queenbee, let me be the person to tell you that you will NEVER forget. That said, you need to figure out from that information if it will cause you to "act ugly". If so, get out now. You don't want to get revenge because it really isn't satisfying. Trust me on that one.
So, decide what it will be. I can move on, treat him as I expect to be treated, ORRRR...
Best wishes.
2006-07-30 19:09:42 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need counseling. Not just marriage counseling, although that would probably help, but you need help getting over a very traumatic experience.
Just remember what kind of mess it created when your husband did that. It won't be any better if you do it too.
2006-07-30 19:08:33 · answer #8 · answered by Privratnik 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should talk to a counsler, It's sometimes nice to talk to someone that doesn't have a hand in the matter- they only see the facts and they don't take sides. It really does help just to let it all out.
2006-07-30 19:07:35 · answer #9 · answered by mightymight 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the only way is to forgive, you will never forget
if you can't forgive, you will always have a hard time, punishing only puts more strain on the relationship, drive him away again(even if it's only reminding him of the situation)
to truely forgive, means to be at complete peace with who you both are now!
2006-07-30 19:11:04 · answer #10 · answered by OKA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋