I am 23 and my husband Is 21. We've known each other a long time but married for 1yr. I want to go out and do things and i feel like my husband would rather play video games or the only way we can go out is if we hang with a friend. We can never agree to do anything together and when we hang out together its the same places. For example I would like to go to salisbury beach to see my family he doesnt want to go because my younger siblings will bother him and i know its annoying but I live with his family and thats annoying I feel like we can do anything together. Sometimes i feel like giving up.
2006-07-30 11:42:12 · 12 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I love cats too! Hey, don't give up. I know it's frustrating, but don't do it.
Married couples need to spend time together, BY THEMSELVES, NOT WITH FRIENDS. That is okay on occasion, but it's not okay all of the time.
You should designate at LEAST to where you can be together. It can be at home have a nice dinner and enjoy a good movie together, go for a nice evening walk and talk, sit in a park in talk, go to a nice restaurant. Spending that time together is very valuable and well needed, it is what keeps a marriage together.
Sit down and have a heart to heart talk with your husband and let him know how you feel. If you need to seek counseling, seek it. Sometimes that is well needed.
It seems like anymore, couples that have problems like this are so quick to give up and get a divorce and then later on down the road they regret it and want to get back together and sometimes that is a problem because the other spouse is married to someone else.
I hope that this helps and maybe opens things up a little bit for you.
You two are pretty young and the first few years of marriage can be absolutely wonderful and sometimes they can be very hard because you are now one, but you also have two different lifestyles that you are trying to get used to .
2006-07-30 11:50:58 · answer #1 · answered by HappyCat 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
A lot of people tend to look at marriage as a destination rather than a beginning. This can be true of guy in particular, not so much because they're any worse than girls as because no one's ever really presented to most of them the idea that romance is something you have to keep alive all your life, rather than something you do to get married and then you've won your prize and you're done.
I don't encourage divorce as an option unless there's infidelity or abuse, but I definitely second the statement that there needs to be a calm, reasonable conversation to let him know that you miss doing romantic things together like you did before you were married, and you still want to date the man you love.
2014-10-06 19:20:26 · answer #2 · answered by dunfalach 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Something like this takes work and effort, from both of you. I'm not married but I have been living with my boyfriend for about a year now. I too realize that sometimes we don't do the things we did our first few months together--going out to eat, getting dressed up for a night out, movies, just taking a drive around town...... Think back to what attracted you two to each other in the beginning. Be spontanious and just get in the car and go somewhere together or take time out and plan a night together. Through it all you BOTH have to be willing to communicate your needs to each other and be willing to please each other.
2006-07-30 18:52:20 · answer #3 · answered by Ari 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I've only been married for five years, but my husband and I cherish every moment we have together. We are best friends and we like to share our time together no matter what we're doing. Marriage is about compromise though so if you put up with his family he should do the same for you. Best of luck to you.
2006-07-30 18:50:28 · answer #4 · answered by ninja_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you wanted to do things together, you need to find things that both of you like to do. Lets face it, it's not fun watching him play video games, and I'm sure there are things you do that aren't fun for him to watch either! Find the common ground. Something you both enjoy. Then, it becomes easier for both of you to compromise on the other things!
2006-07-30 18:50:34 · answer #5 · answered by OKA 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are times when married couples do do their own things. You are both very young. Living with his family I'm sure is adding to your problems. Seek professional help. Maybe look for your own place.
QTI
2006-07-30 19:00:43 · answer #6 · answered by qti36 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are very young to be married, but too old to be stuck in a situation you dont like. Get out before you get pregnant and then are stuck forever.
2006-07-30 18:52:18 · answer #7 · answered by dansza 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DOESN'T SOUND GOOD. I'VE BEEN MARRIED TO THE SAME WOMAN FOR 25 YEARS. FROM THEN TILL NOW, WE GO EVERYWHERE TOGETHER.
WE ARE EACH OTHER'S BEST FRIENDS.
IF YOU DON'T HAVE THAT........THEN IT'S TIME TO MOVE ON.
2006-07-30 18:47:16 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes everyone goes through a phase like that or maybe u just don't have those feelings for each other anymore
2006-07-30 18:45:02 · answer #9 · answered by kiara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep it happens to lots of couples, most of them actually. Just go see your family yourself. It will have its ups and downs, all relationships do.
2006-07-30 18:57:20 · answer #10 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋