My son is 10 months old. He is crawling and pulling up on things to stand. If I don't give him my complete attention he will stand and scream and scream until I pick him up. He screams so long and so hard! I've tried to just ignore him, but it seems to just make him more angry. I thought he was maybe teething, but he always stops screaming once I pick him up. Is this extreme separation anxiety? Does anyone have a child that behaves this way? Does anyone have any suggestions or tips about what I can do to change this behavior? He's driving me crazy and I can't get anything done!!!
2006-07-30 10:42:57 · 12 answers · asked by SillyJilly 1 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
No, I didn't carry him all the time when he was little. These screaming fits just started about 3 weeks ago - He never did this before.
2006-07-30 10:53:45 · update #1
An infant who needs his mother isn't *spoiled*!! He's just smart!!! He is still--even at his incredibly mature age of 10 months--completely dependent on you, and he knows it. When he needs you, he lets you know and keeps telling you until you get the message. How would you feel if you were dropped in another place where you didn't speak the local language and couldn't take care of yourself...and nobody ever answered you. Of course he gets mad!!
My suggestion on how to deal with it...if he needs you, take care of him. That's your job as a parent. It's what you signed up for when you decided to have him--to care for him when he needs it, not when it's convenient for you.
2006-07-30 20:15:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
My 10 month old has started the same fits. She will scream like a banshee when she wants something, whether its food, a toy, or almost all the time now, to be picked up and held. You did nothing wrong, just as I have done nothing. Dont let anyone tell you otherwise. My daughter just knows that by doing this she is able to tell me what she wants...wish she was quieter though. The older they get, it will change.....they may stop screaming, but start throwing things, or biting or even giving us the finger (you never know anymore) Keep in mind, that there is no harm in picking your son up and holding him, he just might need a little comfort and security for awhile. Love him. They stay little for a short time.....spoiled or not. Enjoy.
2006-07-30 11:31:08 · answer #2 · answered by neabean18 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe this is his new way of "asking to be picked up". He used to put his arms up to you and maybe say up-up. He has to put a lot of effort into getting up in order to be closer to your level. Ever grunt and maybe say, oh your getting so big or something like that. The sound of your grunt isn't as harsh when they are standing up. Maybe he thinks he's doing you a favor, and you just don't appreciate it, waaa.
Try this, pick him up, praise him, give him a sweet little hug and put him right back down where he was so he can hold on again. Give him more praise for hanging on, and remind him that Mommy's got work to do, and you'll play with him in a little bit. Don't forget to play with him in a little bit. That works pretty good for most kids. But I'll bet you already tried that. Life is filled with disappointments, find ways to teach him to cope and he'll succeed in life.
Walking that fine line between "don't let them manipulate you" and "neglecting their needs" is difficult. Mine had an many issues like that. She didn't produce enough neurochemicals and needed the kind of outside stimulation that would cause her brain to produce enough to make her brain feel alive. Getting attention, the warmth of a hug & backrub, toys and later, computer games, etc. Without stimulation their brain screams, I'm dying, do something! If your son had that kind of problem, you would see much more than just this one issue.
Sounds like you have tried just about everything. I'm sure that some others here have some good ideas. Always remember to speak with authority, not anger. Discipline with love. And, though expensive, Child Psychologists and Family Therapists can advise you on some behavior modifications.
2006-07-30 12:47:49 · answer #3 · answered by J Z 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should see a doctor just to make sure nothing is wrong first and then don't keep encouraging the bad behavior by doing exactly what he wants you to do. Be strong , take a day or a weekend and totally ignore him when he pitches his fits and as soon as he stops crying and screaming pick him up love him, kiss him, play with him, Soon he will realize he doesn't get anywhere with his screaming and you will be reinforcing the good behavior and not the bad.
2006-07-30 10:57:02 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is hard i know, but just let him scream....check on him and make sure he's OK but don't pick him up...I'm going thru the same thing myself with an 18 month old @ bedtime...it's a power struggle and you have to let him know that you are running the show..not him....set aside a specific time for cuddling and holding him and don't give in....it may take awhile to work but eventually he will get the point that you are not @ his beck and call and that sometimes mommy has more to do than pick him up...good luck!!
2006-07-30 10:52:01 · answer #5 · answered by kuntry_guhl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say he sounds like a spoiled baby. Did you carry him around all the time when he was younger??
Find a sitter who will sit for you every once ina while, no matter if you have something to do or not. Get away from him, do things for you, and make the sitter promise not to carry him around all the time either.
Don't pick him up. Let him yell. He'll eventually realize that you aren't giving in.
2006-07-30 10:48:23 · answer #6 · answered by KD 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most likely he has been spoiled....He knows that if he throws a fit, he will get his way with you. Start letting him cry for a few minutes before you pick him up...dont ignore him but talk to him..tell him that mommy is doing something right now and that he needs to learn patience...even at this young age. He is testing your limits and seeing what he can get away with.
2006-07-30 10:54:14 · answer #7 · answered by Jennifer M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
nicely, right here we pass, at the start, spanking a 10 month previous!!!! truly, what are you questioning? of direction his behaviour is getting worse. Spanking (tiny spanks) is thoroughly disrespectful on your baby. you truly would desire to get knowledgeable on baby progression speedy. Take some parenting courses. he's merely 10 months previous. Chucking nutrition at this age is thoroughly conventional behaviour! pass to the babycenter. com and initiate off from the beginning up or you ought to have a tousled baby.
2016-10-01 06:45:42 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you messed him up not to be mean but you should have just let him be on the floor ever since he was small thats what most parents do wrong the babys get used to being carried all the time so now they cry when you dont pick them up try to leave him down most of the time.
2006-07-30 10:45:58 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
That reminds me of how my little brother was with my mom. It's probably normal.. I mean 10 months is little. But what do I know, if it doesn't stop soon you should talk to his pediatrician about it.
2006-07-30 10:47:34 · answer #10 · answered by Amanda 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋