Why is it ok for gays to call each other fags but...?

Question

when a straight man does...they get pissed. I am gay and I hate the word fag in general.

Answer 1

because we adopted the term, and robbed them (haters) of it's power, black people did the same thing with the n-word.............it's not really about the word but the tone and the context it's in.

Answer 2

Among true friends any word can be a term of endearment. If it helps, a (F - **) Fag is a cig or a bundle of wood - - what is truly a hoot is that it gets censored a lot. Try not to take words are hateful, that deflates their of meaning - - when you view a word as hateful it is. Peace.

Answer 3

i personally have never heard a gay person use that word, but i suppose it is the same as one woman calling another *****. it's done from a much different level then when a straight guy calls a gay guy ***. i guess it's all about how it is said and by whom. Either way i think it's just as bad as the n word. the both make my skin crawl.

Answer 4

I guess it would be similar to a "love hate" relationship. Example, it's ok for me to tell my brother he's stupid but if someone else calls him stupid I'll jump in to his defense. Not that I think he's stupid, just an example. I use the f a g word when I'm referring to a flamer or someone who fits the typical gay stereotype. I guess I'm not much into the "scene" or fem guys, but when I use the word I'm not using it to hate I'm just using it to describe someone...i dunno. It seems like when straight people use the word they do it in a hateful way. Just like blacks can call each other the N word but if a white person said it they'd get slapped.

Answer 5

I think it's not ok. There are some words I'm ok with "reclaiming" (like queer, as an adjective. Mostly in the context of the queer nation manifesto and how that puts it). But fag isn't ok. Mostly because it refers to burning people like sticks.

And my other queer friends know I don't like fag, and while several disagree they do at least try to not use it in my presence.

Answer 6

I'm gay and I hate words like that in general too, so don't think you're alone.

If some other gay person called me a ****** I would tell him to shut the **** up. I'm assuming most NORMAL people wouldn't want to be called ******* either.

Answer 7

I have many friends, gay and straight, that refer to each other with the "F" word. It isn't it's use that I find derogatory, it's the intent for which it is used that could be offensive.

Answer 8

I despise the word... and do not use it to describe anyone of the homosexual persuasion... it is as derogatory as the 'N' word...

This is not to say that I have never nor do not currently use the 'F' or 'N' word... but neither are used as a term of endearment they, for me, are used to descibe people with '*********' or 'faggotish' tendencies and are used to descibe people other than black or gay...

Answer 9

I hate the word f*g as well. And I don't think it is alright for anyone to call anyone else something derogatory. Why doesn't everyone just give one another compliments? Is that so hard?

Answer 10

I didn't know gays can call each other that. I heard this convesation on the raido once where a black gay man said he'd rather be called the "N" word than a "f_g" I thought that was crazy!

Answer 11

By using it in an affectionate way with each other, it helps diminish the power of the word when others use it.