He says that I am never going to amount to anything in my career, and everything that I do. All he does is to pick a fight with me whenever I come for a visit. He calls me fat, ugly and stupid. He also says the reason why I never have a steady boyfriend is because I am so fat and ugly. I told him noone in our family has the thin gene, so there is no way I am going to be a size two. Even my doctor says my metablism makes it difficult to loose weight. Should I stop visiting my family. My mom always makes excuses for him, "well he is that way because his family was that way. I am so tired of my mom making excuses for him. My dad told my brother that he is fat . He is not he is buff. He worksout at the gym. He accuses my brother of taking steroids which is false. He calls my brother an alcholic and that he doesn't want him around. Should I divorce my family altogether. They always criticize me and never want to help me emotionally and economically when in need.
2006-07-30 07:55:01 · 10 answers · asked by Contessa 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
You should try talking to your father. I am not agreeing with what he is doing but if his family did treat each other the way he treats you then he may not know another way to act. It may not be something he is capable of doing alone and if you help him then maybe you can make your relationship better. Maybe in his twisted mind he actually thinks he is trying to help you by pointing out what he thinks (I said what he thinks not what I or anyone else thinks) are your trouble areas. This maybe in his warped mind his only way of telling you he loves you. Try to work though this with him. It will be very hard and he may not change. If he doesn't change and refuses to even try then he doesn't deserve you. Every one has faults and makes mistakes but not every one is willing to change their faults. I hope that your father is so you can have relationship with him. But he is wrong. His behavior is wrong and he should be loving and supportive. Help him work though his problems and it should help you with yours. God loves you. Hope this helps.
2006-07-30 08:17:16 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Good thing is that he doesn't hit you nor does any physical harm to you, but he sure treats you like trash and he is sure hurting your feelings. This will leave you in a state of shock and trauma for the rest of your life. Parents that call their own children such names are not parents. They are enemies. If there is something that I cannot stand is horrible parents like the ones you have. You need to get out of there and have that abusive father of yours thrown in jail. Get a tape recorder and record him, then show the tape to the cops. That guy is your enemy, he's not your father. It doesn't matter is he never physically abuses you. Just verbal abuse is enough to have him thrown in jail. Your mom approves of that no good father of yours to be insulting you like that. Get out of that house. If you are a minor, call CPS, but if you are an adult, leave right now. Take your brother with you.
2015-08-08 02:50:53 · answer #2 · answered by Jorge 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad sounds like he has some serious issues and he takes it out on everyone else. I don't think that you should divorce your family, but you certainly have the right to speak up and say something about it.
You can either confront your dad and tell him to keep all his trash talking to himself or you can simply excommunicate him out until he's ready to act like a father.
For holidays or get togethers, start inviting your family to your place, or your brother's place, or even out to a restaurant. You can still stay close with your family and not invite your dad. Make it clear why your dad isn't invited - not because you don't love him, but because of the way he treats you and your brother.
This issue isn't going to get resolved until you and/or your brother stand up to your parents and tell them that what they are doing isn't right. Nip this in the bud now, because you don't want your kids having grandparents like them in the future.
2006-07-30 08:22:54 · answer #3 · answered by Rawrrrr 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
should not be put up with that all. do you have any other family on the outside would loves you for who you are that may take you in and live with them. running away is not cool just make things get even worst. do you have any aunts or uncles that will help you by staying with them instead living with your parents. you can get help by seeing a speaking to a shrenk. that might help your parents see who you are and not what you are. some things in life is not fair for skinning or fat people. go by your heart to show how much you love your parents. tell them that they need to seek for help.
most parents should not treat their children like that. no matter what message they are trying to tell you. do what you like to do and don't let them push you so far off the edge.
2006-07-30 08:08:00 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get into counseling. Fast! My mother treated me that way for years. After counseling I found that I was a good person. I got to a point that I was able to tell my mother that she was verbally abusive and that I was not going to accept it any more. If she wanted to be part of my family that the abuse had to stop. It took a while for this to sink in. Our relationship got to a point after wards, that I was able to go take care of her in her last days and knew that I was loved and wanted and she felt the same way. Good luck.
2006-07-30 08:07:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
The first thing I need to tell you is that it's not YOU, it's your father and mother who have a problem that is affecting you. You've done nothing to deserve such treatment and they ARE abusing you. Your father is abusing you because of what he says and your mother is abusing you by allowing your father to do it. Here is a number you can call: 1-800-4-A-CHILD; 1-800-422-4453
If you have the choice, stop visiting them. IM me if I can help.
2006-07-30 08:06:25 · answer #6 · answered by DelK 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
My heart goes out to you..I'm so sorry that you have to go through this..Its awful when your parents say and do these things to their children..I don't know what advice to give you..I went through similar times in my childhood..you should always love your family..but sometimes its hard to do so..your mom is wrong to take up for him..but she is probably scared that he will leave her if she stands up to him..All i can say is do what you feel is best..look into your heart and decide...plz do not let the comments hurt your pride and confidence in yourself..OK?? one time my mom put a gun to my head and said she would blow my brains out...she didn't do it..as you know..but my response to her was...PLZ DO IT!! i was 14 years old at the time.. so you can get over the hurtful things people say to you--that's what I'm trying to show you..Keep your confidence in yourself no matter what.. good luck sweetie..
2006-07-30 09:00:15 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sorry to say this, but yes, it's time to tell your father to value you as a human or to stay out of your life. And I'd be telling your mother that it's her job to protect her kids, not her husband. Verbal abuse by both is reason enough to not go back to your family.
2006-07-30 08:01:31 · answer #8 · answered by GirlinNB 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
yeah. ur dad is cruel and ur mom in making the wrong decision, thats not good, so pretty much dont listen to him, he is not cause he is family is, its cause he thinks he can get his rage out on u calling u names, so dont let him get to you, he is a stupid person (im not trying to be mean but he is) if he was ur dad he would always encourage you, but u dont need him if he keeps calling u names what good ill it do? nothing,
2006-07-30 08:00:59 · answer #9 · answered by Mane 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
your brother should give him one hell of a reality check......RIGHT BETWEEN THE EYES!
2006-07-30 08:12:23 · answer #10 · answered by Dale D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋