How do I know if I am still in love with him or just still *care* about him??? What do I do??? I think about it alot.
2006-07-30 04:01:53 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are probably missing certain characteristics he had more than the person itself.
I was in the same mode after my first wife split, since we had had an almost telepathic connection, (to the point where she couldn't even keep the fact of her infidelity secret from me, and NOT because she told me. I sensed it and she couldn't deny it when confronted with it).
Oh well...
In retrospect I was better off without her, as I found out later that despite my loving the s*x with her (because I was sooo in love with her), she was the lousiest lay I ever had. Of course her being my first (as I was for her), I had been unaware of that. Never entered my mind. (but was one good way to get over her).
I hope this helps.
Concentrate on the things you DIDN'T like about him and break yourself of him that way. That always worked for me.
2006-07-30 04:08:39 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
There can be many reasons for why you feel the way you do, but none of that matters at this point. What matters is what are you going to do about those feelings. First and foremost you want to know if you are or can still be friends, so if youre on talking terms with him ask him out for coffee or whatever on sort of a "fact-finding" date and see what happens. If you two were always meant to be , love will find a way to reunite you two. Remember, if you want something, you will take a risk, but if you want something bad enough,you will risk everything. Take a risk and go find out or you will regret it. Good luck
2006-07-30 04:18:58 · answer #2 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The problems which caused the divorce are still there, you just softened it with time. It wont help to try again. Move on with your life and try to meet lots of new people. I dont believe there is only 1 match for you, you can make it work with almost anyone you tried, if you are willing to put in the effort, and they are not total jerks.
Hope you will do better next time..
2006-07-30 04:17:04 · answer #3 · answered by stoutseun69 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Divorces happen for a reason. I dont know the reasons of your separation but it is perfectly natural to miss the person you were with. You need to work on your self steem and move on. Until you do so, you will be in this predicament for a long time. It is common to miss the person we once got in love with, but remember the past IS NOT the present and the image you have in your head of this person in fact, is not reality.
2006-07-30 04:12:53 · answer #4 · answered by Apollo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First off if you have this sense of needing him still, you should not enter into a relationship with anyone else because you will wind up hurting the other person. Make sure you are ready to move on or if you still need him try and work things out.......
2006-07-30 04:14:04 · answer #5 · answered by dasani 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's common, you will always care for him, and part of you in your own way will always love him. You spent time and shared things with each other that noone else will ever know. It just takes time to get over him but those feelings will never go away. So to gain you back........just start doing things to keep your mind off him, I am assuming after several years seperated there is no chance of reconciling, so just move on.............find another guy to share your life with and take your mind off of him.
2006-07-30 04:20:13 · answer #6 · answered by rdhedhottie 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you *care* about him still, then you love him because you love the people you care about. Maybe now that time has gone by you are both more experienced and can now work at the problems that made you split to begin with.
2006-07-30 04:10:22 · answer #7 · answered by applecheeks 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
DON'T GET REMARRIED BUT STAY IN CONTACT WITH HIM. LIKE GO OUT TO THE MOVIES, LUNCH, DINNER, ETC. SO YOU WILL FEEL LIKE YOU'RE MARRIED. IMAGINE HE HAS TO LIVE IN ANOTHER COUNTRY OR STATE FAR AWAY FROM HOME BECAUSE THAT'S WHERE HIS WORK IS. TRY MEETING LIKE ONCE OR TWICE A WEEK.
2006-07-30 04:15:01 · answer #8 · answered by falconbenz10 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's not committed, call him and invite him to dinner and tell him you'd like to go to Vegas to tie the knot again.
2006-07-30 04:07:03 · answer #9 · answered by wmp55 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you said you were a happy mom so be it,give yourself a space as well as your exhubby,if your really meant to be back in his arms again it will happen,just keep yourself always busy.Ok
2006-07-30 04:11:57 · answer #10 · answered by iris joy b 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋