*He Will Always be With You*
The rain fell heavly on the roof
There the girl lay awake in bed
Her eyes where wide and full of fear
Lightning flashed in yellow and red
Tears came down the dread-filled face
Thunder roared lofty and loud
Fear came over her tiny faith
She sat up and screamed aloud
Then a light brighter than the sun
Shone briliantly in her darkened room
A voice so soft and majestic then spoke
"Hush little child don't be filled with gloom"
"I am your faithful guardian angel
Your father has sent me here to you
He loves you so dearly, child
He will always be with you"
He disappeared and darkness came back
And rain came down more than ever
But this time came reassuring peace
Love and protection she felt forever
2006-07-30 03:08:18 · 15 answers · asked by OnFireForJesus! 3 in Arts & Humanities ➔ Philosophy
The rain fell heavily on the roof;
There the girl lay awake in bed.
Her eyes where wide and full of fear;
Lightning flashed in yellow and red.
Tears came down the dread-filled face,
Thunder roared lofty and loud;
Fear came over her tiny faith,
She sat up and screamed aloud. -
Then a light brighter than the sun
Shone brilliantly in her darkened room;
A voice so soft and majestic then spoke:
"Hush, little child, don't be filled with gloom!
"I am your faithful guardian angel:
Your father has sent me here to you.
He loves you so dearly, child;
He will always be with you."
He disappeared and darkness came back,
And rain came down more than ever;
But this time came reassuring peace;
Love and protection she felt forever.
2006-07-30 03:59:45 · answer #1 · answered by sauwelios@yahoo.com 6 · 1⤊ 3⤋
*He Will Always be With You*
The rain fell heavly on the roof
There the girl lay awake in bed
Her eyes wide and full of fear
Lightning flashed in yellow and red
Tears came down her dread-filled face
Thunder roared lofty and loud
Fear came over her tiny faith
She sat up and screamed aloud
Then a light brighter than the sun
Shone briliantly in her dark room
A voice so soft and majestic then spoke
"Hush little child, don't be filled with gloom"
"I am your faithful guardian angel
Your father has sent me to protect you
He loves you so dearly, child
He will always be with you"
He disappeared and darkness came back
And rain poured down more than ever
But this time came reassuring peace
Love and protection she felt forever
2006-07-30 10:26:08 · answer #2 · answered by TMH 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmmm, well I liked the first two verses, but after that it kinda went down hill for me. Its my own personal taste though.
Your poem is sweet and nice, but its a little juvenile.
"I am your faithful guardian angel
Your father has sent me here to you
He loves you so dearly, child
He will always be with you"
---> there was something wrong here that was just off.
He disappeared and darkness came back
And rain came down more than ever
But this time came reassuring peace
Love and protection she felt forever
that was my favorite part
keep up the good work.
2006-07-30 10:15:55 · answer #3 · answered by lilfroggy992 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. Take a college level English course.
2. After taking Freshman English (not just remedial, but composition and literature, as well), sign up for a creative writing poetry class.
3. Place this poem in a drawer. When you finish your poetry class, look at it one more time, and you will know what to do with it, and you will appreciate this advice.
4. Take your question to Arts and Humanities. This has is not a philosophical question.
2006-07-30 11:34:39 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I found spelling errors in the first and third lines and punctuation marks here and there which, I hope, are not intentional. The poem is very nice as it gives vent to soft feelings of heart and hard optimism of head. You must proceed on.
2006-07-30 10:52:26 · answer #5 · answered by das.ganesh 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sew that one into your grandma's quilt~
There's not one metaphor aside from fear.
Lightning scaring a child is SO CLICHE
Guardian Angels coming to the aid of whimpering children?
WTF
Where's the guardian angel for the kids hiding in bloody trenches,
God loves the pitiful little whimpering girl in the Safe attic?
this poem Makes me sick
2006-07-30 11:40:54 · answer #6 · answered by -.- 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's a decent poem. You really just need to learn to spell and punctuate properly.
2006-07-30 10:11:58 · answer #7 · answered by Allison 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's corny but may appeal to religious people. Also, you have no sense of poetic rhythm.
"Fear came over her tiny faith"? What does that mean?
2006-07-30 10:16:32 · answer #8 · answered by notyou311 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's a good poem.
The only thing is in the third line. I think you meant to put WERE, not WHERE.
2006-07-30 11:38:39 · answer #9 · answered by Renee P 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
that he would appear one day again. That the sun should shine just as bright. That she would always be protected.
2006-07-30 10:13:57 · answer #10 · answered by Smiley 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋