II am considering getting my drivers license. I AM 43 and have never been behind the wheel. Any advice?

Question

The whole idea of driving freaks me out.

Yeah right Jake, sign me up for my cpp whilst your at it.
Geeezz. I am calling the drivers schools now!!

Answer 1

"The whole idea of driving freaks me out".

You said it.

However you also said "I am considering getting my drivers license. Let us examine this two statements.

It is not too late to lean any thing.

So go ahead learn to drive.

This is one thing that if you do not use it you can loose it. That means you must get your driver license so that you can stay in practise. You will need a car if you do not need it every day then you can rent it as you need it from rental companies, most companies give away the cars at very cheap rates as they have more cars then the parking spots at places like down town and airports during slow periods (usually weekends but specially long weekends).

At 43 you are not only mature but you are in prime of your life.

If I were you I will do the following.

Find a driving school private or public(call university community college even high school adult program...).

Rest is up to you.

Good luck.

Minoo

Answer 2

Excellent -- if you learn well, you will have years of pleasure and freedom to move ahead of you! You are not wrong to be nervous, but this will be overcome by training and study. You will need to learn two sets of things.

First, you will need to learn the standard things that are taught regular driving schools and tested for in exams. These are basically the 'Rules of the Road', e.g., signs, signals, left-turn only lanes, etc., etc. etc. These are necessary, but not sufficient to be a good driver.

Second, -- the skills of how to actually handle the car -- is most important, and it is not normally taught in the US (but is taught in many other countries) . This is particularly important in your case because you lack experience. It will really help your confidence to find this training.

So, what am I talking about and where do you find it?

You are looking for training that is usually called something like a 'Car Control Clinic'. These are typically held on large parking lots or old unused airport runways, where you can learn how a car behaves in a safe environment. These are a combination of classroom sessions teaching the principles and driving skills exercises out on the wide expanse of pavement. You both learn to drive a car with confidence, and gives you the skills to handle well the inevitable emergencies so that they do not turn into accidents.

Where do you find this training? The best place is car clubs such as the BMW Car Club (www.bmwcca.org), the Sports Car Club of America (www.scca.org), Miata club, or a dedicated school such as CarControl.com (www.carcontrol.com). For the clubs, just check out their web sites, find a local chapter and ask questions -- if you're interested, people will be very helpful (and you don't have to have a BMW or whatever to be welcomed by the club).

I have no commercial interest in any of these organizations, though I did take my mom to the CarControl one, and we both had a great time, and learned a lot (and she'd been driving for 40+ years). Get the real info from people who really focus on it, learn a lot, and enjoy!

Answer 3

Don't be afraid. It's really not that difficult. Look at all the dummmies out there with a license and take heart. You can do it if I can. Look in the phone book to find a drivers eductation class you can take. They're not just for kids. If you live in an area that only has drivers' ed in the high schools, call up the teacher and ask if he/she would be willing to give you lessons outside of school hours. Likely they'd be willing to help. I advise against having anyone you know teach you because it could cause alot of extra pressure.

Answer 4

Odds are that if you are frightened of driving, it is not in anyone's best interest for you to drive. Fear will cause you to overreact to situations that WILL come up and may cause you to do the wrong thing, making the situation more dangerous. Having a clear mind and being in control is a MUST.

Your reactions can cause others to have accidents too, so it is very important that you be in full control of your emotions when driving.

That said, I'd enroll in a driver's training course and learn with a professional teacher by your side. AFTER that, you can begin to drive with other people and give yourself time to see if you can overcome your fears. A few sessions with a therapist may help as well.

IF you can get past your fears, then you'll be a driver in no time.

Answer 5

I have recent experience with the world of learning to drive, as one of my sons started lessons 3 years ago (and has long since finished), and the other son will start shortly.

The professional driving instructor that I trust most told me that it is good for the student to have some time sitting behind the wheel and driving slowly around a parking lot with an experienced driver BEFORE starting lessons with an instructor. That allows the person to gain an understanding of what each control does (the pedals, the gear selector, the steering wheel, etc.); more importantly, it gives the student a FEEL for the various controls. A very important part of learning to drive is to operate the vehicle SMOOTHLY, and this means developing a feel for what each control (accelerator, brake, and steering wheel, basically) will do.

I think that spending time in a deserted parking lot getting familiar with the vehicle is particularly important in your case, because you said that you are apprehensive about the driving experience. Starting in a calm, non-threatening environment will be very helpful for you. An important part of that is the experienced driver you choose to work with. It should be someone with many years of experience, who is very confident of his knowledge of driving, and who can provide clear instructions without overreacting to things that will happen during the learning process (such as braking too hard or turning too sharply).

Another important part of the learning process is the student (you). You need to remain focused on learning how to make the vehicle do what you want it to do. You can't remain focused if you tend to get upset with the instructor (either the friend who drives with you in a parking lot, or the professional instructor that you hire when you're ready). So consider your own personality and whether it will be hard for you to perform the role of a good student.

Regarding the instructor:
If you have a friend who has all the characteristics described above, and who is willing to spend the time to lead you through ALL phases of driving, then you could consider not using a driving school. You should plan to spend at least two months, at least 20 hours, and at least 500 miles learning everything you can (and believe me, that won't begin to be everything there is to know about driving). If you don't have such a friend, you pretty much have to use a school.

I was very disappointed with what my first son's driving school taught (what it failed to teach, actually), so my second son will be going to a different one that I selected after calling all the schools and interviewing them over the phone. (One school that I rejected immediately was the one where the instructor answered the phone (a cell phone, apparently), asked me to wait a minute, and then I could hear him tell a student to pull over so that he could talk to me. You don't want to have an instructor who is answering the school's phone number while he is supposed to be teaching you.)

If you know someone who recently learned to drive (or whose son or daughter recently learned), you can get some advice on local schools. Incidentally, the school that I found unsatisfactory was the AAA's driving school. They didn't teach anything beyond the basics, so I have had to teach my son a LOT of things they should have provided. Since my second son is a bit harder for me to teach things to, I'm glad that he will be going to a different school that will carry more of the teaching burden (and at a lower price).

Finally, about the vehicle:
A driving school will probably provide a vehicle for the lessons they provide, and it will probably be relatively new and relatively small, both of which will make it easier to drive. But for your initial experience in a parking lot (or for all your lessons, if you choose not to use a professional instructor), it is much better to have a relatively new car, or one that is in exceptionally good condition (if it has to be one that's more than a few years old). Simple reason that you need a newer car: As a new driver, you want the accelerator, brake, steering wheel, ignition key, turn signal, windshield wipers, and everything else to do EXACTLY what they're supposed to do. You're not yet ready to make adjustments for things that work pretty well but not exactly right. That comes after you have quite a bit of experience.

Those are my thoughts on the subject.
Hope you find them helpful.

Answer 6

This is not as uncommon as people would think. I know two guys I have worked with that have spouses that do not drive and one is nearly 50 and the other 40. I hired a man one time that was fro New Jersey and he was 43 and had never drove a car or had a license. Have someone give you lessons and get comfortable then start the process.

Answer 7

Just take one step at a time...get your permit and have a friend go with you to an uncrowded parking lot or other open spaces. Get a feel for how the car behaves....use of the pedals, steering, etc. Then gradually work towards more precision in turns. After you feel comfortable, then you can start on roads. Take your time, you will do great...there are millions of drivers out there...even a few good ones.

BTW, also check locally for a driving school...they can help you feel more comfortable with your skills.

Answer 8

My father was in his 40s when he got his license. He was so glad he did. He was a new man. I remember riding with him and he would sing while we rode. He said he had never felt so free and was saddened that he wasted so many years without and being dependent on others.

Driving can be very fearful but like anything else, the more you do it the easier it becomes.

Don't learn from a loved one, it seems they have less patience of all. Take some lessons and do it.

Good luck

Answer 9

"The whole idea of driving freaks me out."
Tell me about it.
We got my Mothers drivers license taken away when she was 43, our reason was simply that she was too elderly to drive.
If you need a ride I am sure you can get a Handi-dart bus to pick you up.

Answer 10

it's not very dangerous if you're conscious of yourself and your surroundings. I got my driver's license later than most, and I've found that the most important thing (outside of obeying traffic laws) is just to watch out around you. Notice traffic patterns, driveways & parking lot exits, intersections, crosswalks, motorcycles...pretty much everything in vision range. Obviously, accidents happen, but if you're safe and aware, you can avoid almost all. Hope this helps.