i'm engaged to someone who loves me truley ,but my problem is that i don't love him as he loves me,but i feel comfortable when i'm with him . do u think i'll love him.?i don't want to break his heart
coz i refused him earlier & when i found out his love & how i broke his heart ,i accepted his proposal.just tell me what to do.i don't want to break up with him.
2006-07-30 00:47:49 · 11 answers · asked by sarah 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
well,sweetie you are confused?
lemme tell you,just look at yourself,you dont want to hurt him,even if it has to be at the cost of your happiness,you want to be with him b/c you feel comfortable,you want to give him joy at the cost of your joy,what is all this?
this is what love is?maybe you have some high hopes from love,so you are not able to decide on it but trust me if this guy makes you feel all that you feel for him,just grab him.......there are hardly any people out there who are in love and happy and you,you have complete love,just dont let it go!!
2006-07-30 00:55:56 · answer #1 · answered by country_girl 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
The best thing for you would be to tell him the truth. Every one goes through heart break at some point in their life. It is not your fault that he can not deal with it. You need to do this not just for your sake but his. Eventually he will get over it and you will move on. But you can't force yourself to be in a relationship that you don't feel is equal. If you do break up with him then you need to stay away from him and no talking to him for several weeks. Otherwise you will just do the same thing again. I know that you don't want to break up with him but would you rather break up with him when you are married? My husband was in love and engaged before he met me. She broke it off after they sent the wedding invites out. It ruined him seriously. He drank himself into obesity and was a disaster. If she had done it early I don't think it would have been that bad. Now he says he is happier than ever, lost the weight, stopped drinking. All his friends say the same thing., thank God he met you because so and so was not very nice to him and etc... It turned out for the better for all of us even though it caused him a year of ruin!
2006-07-30 01:32:52 · answer #2 · answered by michiganwife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's worse to marry him than break his heart now. Because there's someone out there who will love him the same. I'm not sure there is an easy painless way to back out of the marriage deal without him breaking it off altoghter, but you can try by telling him it's a big step, you want to get used to the idea, and see how it proceeds. If he has marriage on his mind and you don't it'll cause great stress.By keeping him and not wanting to get married aren't you wanting your cake and eat it too?
2006-07-30 00:57:10 · answer #3 · answered by BETH 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Love is a mystery itself. Some find it and others search for it through their whole life without success. Being comfortable with him is great but how much do you love him? Enough to commit to him for life, or enough to only stay for awhile? At this point your just engaged so why not see how things go from this point 'cause time will tell.
2006-07-30 02:29:35 · answer #4 · answered by RuneDragon 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I as long as you feel comfortable with him it's a kind of love. May be by time you will love him in the true sense of the word. Don't lose a heart who loves you. Good luck.
2006-07-30 00:59:34 · answer #5 · answered by Emma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well it's not the same but one time a boy asked me on a date and i accepted and soon he was my boyfriend.But i wasn't so in to him.I really felt comfortable with him and i trusted him but i didn't love him.So i thougth i could learn to love him.... and guess what?...i couldn't.There wasn't any spark between us he thougth every thing was perfect.I couldn't take it any more but when I broth the question up he was so sad he started talking that his life is ever and etc.It was HELL but it was for the best.I haven't hurd from him in 2 mounts.
So my advise to you is to "decline" in a ... softly way... you have to make him understand that you won't be happy and he doesn't want that, does he?... i mean if the truly loves you he wouldn't want you to be miserable
2006-07-30 01:30:13 · answer #6 · answered by Maggi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't ever marry someone that you have dout about. If you don't want to break up with him because you want to be with him then that is one thing, but if you are only staying with him because you don't want to hurt his feelings then you must know this is no reason to stay with someone. If this is the case then you are wasting your time and his. Yes it may break his heart, but he will heal, and the sooner you leave the sooner he can start to heal his pain, don't stay out of pity!
2006-07-30 00:56:54 · answer #7 · answered by angel 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sarah, you will not be doing this guy a favour if you marry him out of sympathy. Better to break his heart now,- it will mend, than for both of you to live a lifetime of resentment.
2006-07-30 00:56:05 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you dont want to break up w/ him so wats d use of asking..... for me i rather choose a man hu loves me more dan i love him dan to a man hum i love n hu doesnt love me.......if he's realy gud tym will come u will also love him.....
2006-07-30 00:54:58 · answer #9 · answered by kimy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Stop fooling yourself and your partner. You are not just playing a toy...you are dealing with human emotions....Make up your mind girl!!!!!
2006-07-30 01:23:31 · answer #10 · answered by ellysee2006 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋