While we were engaged, my now wife never really had a strong sex drive, twice a month. Of course I am a guy and would love to have sex twice daily. I would settle for 2-3 x per week. She says that sex has never really been that important to her. I knew this before we got married 6 months ago and it has not decreased in frequency.
So I've tried to be understanding blah, blah, blah. Then yesterday I just asked her if she ever gets horny. She says rarely. This was weird to me, I'm always horny! I am a paramedic by profession and know her medical history and am absolutley certain that she just really does not have interest in sex, with me or anyone. She has even jokingly/serious told me to get a girlfriend, RIGHT! I'm faithful but i'm dying here. Its also killing my ego. Any ideas?
2006-07-29 20:52:02 · 13 answers · asked by springroofer 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Some women just naturally have lower sex drives. If there hasn't been a change from before you were married through now, I'd say that's just how she is. I suggest therapy and getting very used to taking matters into your own hands so to speak.
2006-07-29 20:57:37 · answer #1 · answered by Kanga_tush2 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know so many men that this has happened to. What's with these women who are all hot and horny til they get that gold band? Don't have to try any more? It's really dishonest. Plenty of women love sex as much as men (well, maybe not quite as much ;). But then there are women and men who can live without sex. Everyone tries to tell you that sex isn't that important in a relationship, but in my experience, good sex can get a couple through alot of rough spots. (You always know where every fight's gonna end ;) But I've also experienced unequal sex drives with my first husband and watched male friends and relatives deal with this problem. It will just get worse. Maybe you do love her, but do we have to marry everyone we love? If your marriage means so little to her that she could even joke like that and she cares so little for your pain, I would say that you've made a mistake in marrying her. Sorry. Good luck.
2006-07-30 05:33:47 · answer #2 · answered by R. F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Women like sex more once they are in the thirties. It is possible that your wife has not had good experiences with sex and she isn't getting as much out of it as you are. Try to learn what she likes. Also romance all day long sets the mood for later. Try making little comments all day, hold her hand, hug her, kiss her unexpectantly ect.... without running to the bedroom. Big turn off is a man in a rush. Just a little here and there all day, sort of set the mood. Talk to her too and let her know how you feel in a way that is nice. I mean explain to her what you like about making love to her. Help her to understand that it is more than just Sex!
2006-07-30 04:05:46 · answer #3 · answered by krichard70 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe she has had the extreme orgasm that gets most gals hooked on sex (and that isn't taking a stab at you by no means) I myself used to HATE sex thought it was pointless until I met my husband(who was a little more experienced than I was) and he blew my mind away now I'm always horny. Hell in the beginning it was so bad he used to tell me not tonight I've got a head ache lol.
Next time you guys have sex try just really giving her the attention ask her what she wants you to do or hell find her g-spot and don't let off until she gets off. Maybe then she will change her mind.
2006-07-30 05:25:53 · answer #4 · answered by shellshell 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your wife has a low sex drive and you have a high sex drive. That won't work out. Suggest you take up your wife's suggestion to get a girlfriend. But make sure there will be no complications to your marriage. If having a girlfriend is not your cup of tea cos you are a faithful man, then I suggest you look for Mrs. Palm and her five daughters who live close to you.
2006-07-30 04:25:56 · answer #5 · answered by Lawrence 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girlfriends are never something to joke about. What you need
to do is go to marital counseling. You need to be heard. You have
your needs. This is a marital problem and a marriage counselor
will be able to tell her how important this matter is. This can be a total deal breaker.
Maybe you need a sex couselor (fun!). Think of the homework.
In any event, she is essentially driving you away and that is not
good. Nagging is not going to work. You need to seek pro help.
Good luck with this! She just doesn't know what she's missing.
Oh, and to answer your question. "Absolutely!"
2006-07-30 04:06:26 · answer #6 · answered by Linda S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You knew this and married her anyway so you really can't complain you did it to yourself. I suggest some lotion and a towel. If its something she has never felt a strong drive for that most likely wont change and ordinarily I would feel bad for you but you knew the deal up front. Good luck with that!
2006-07-30 04:22:30 · answer #7 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First - cool job, Bra!! I was going to be an EMT before I blew out my knee - but I have mad respect for the job and the men and women who take up the profession!
Second - been in your situation with a girlfriend who really wasn't into sex. It wasn't a problem at first, then- it eventually split us up. I only wish we could have talked about it more and come up with a compromise, but she didn't want to meet me half way!
Try talking to your wife, try to figure something out!!
Good Luck, Bra!
Aloha!
2006-07-30 04:03:08 · answer #8 · answered by gabriel_demus 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No Married women dont get horny
They only have feelings between thier legs
2006-07-30 04:34:48 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes married women defiantly get horny .I'm a prime example
2006-07-30 04:01:11 · answer #10 · answered by mz.hunnie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋