Hi All;) ..In today's permissive society, is it better to be married or just live together?:)?

Question

... And why?
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Thanks in advance, for answering!;)

Answer 1

I would have to say that this is about personal choice, isn't it? Marriage is kind of like "Love" -the word tends to be quite ambiguous (open to interpretation). People call infatuation "love" and signing a paper and having a ceremony and honeymoon "marriage"- and we're free to believe that, there's nothing wrong with that unless one's definition is different.

For myself (the only person I can say) I think a marriage takes planning and tools- and so FEW marriages LAST because so many people don't understand that in a REAL marriage all the hardest stuff and worst sides of you and another is going to come out eventually- because THAT is what INTIMACY really IS!!! And that is what the commitment part is about- being REAL.

Now from a legal standpoint, it's irrelevant in the end, really. The pros and cons ballance each other for either choice, unless there are children involved- or going to be.

I believe marriage needs to be respected for what it is a lot more. The best way to do that I have seen is to not marry someone until you really know them well- and know wether or not they will abandon you and betray the commitment when the chips are down. That means you have to live with them.

Answer 2

First, this is not a permissive society. Ask any teenage girl who is pregnant and unable to get parental consent for an abortion. Ask interracial couples who can't get an apartment. Ask minorities who just can't seem to get those well-paying jobs.

As for married vs living together? That depends on what you're looking for. If you're just living together and one of you gets sick, the other one has no input into your medical treatment, and won't even be allowed to visit if it's a "family only" situation. One of you won't be able to put the other one on his/her health care/dental/vision plan at work which means you'll both be paying for separate coverage. If you don't have iron-clad wills, and one of you dies, the other one loses everything you've bought together. The legal implications can be staggering. However, if you live together for 5 years (in most states) it's considered a common-law marriage and each spouse is entitled to 50% of the property during divorce.

If you decide to get married, then your children will have one last name and your legal rights are immediately protected. Of course, dissolving a marriage is more difficult than just moving on when you get bored with each other.

So, if you're looking for a real commitment, then you get married. If you're not certain what you'll want in the future, just live together. Either way, it's a crap-shoot.

Answer 3

I recommend living together for a while until u get 2 know each others good and bad points.
Don't wait until u are married 2 find out that your partner does many things that annoy the h*ll out of u.
That happens pretty often.

Answer 4

Years ago it was the only right thing to do but years later it is not necessary to marry. You can still have a good relationship just living together. Marriage is only a piece of paper anyways.
and if there is a break up there is no going to court or anything over it. it should still be equal in everything..

Answer 5

Really comes down to your relationship and what you want out of it. The only time I would say marriage is definately a good idea is if you are having children.

But nowadays people get divorced faster then you can get married so it is not like their is any permancy or loyalty in marriage anymore.

Answer 6

This a question that only the two people
involved can decide.
Many people like to be married, and a lot
of happy couples just live together.
It has to be a win win for both.

Answer 7

I think it is better to be married, survivor can collect Social Security, no custodial problems if a partner dies, a sense of commitment.

Answer 8

If you love them and want to spend yoou life with them then marrage. If you need help to pay the bills then just live together

Answer 9

Just live together or have a prenup....... i mean when you get divorce the you have to share everything in half...thats what happened to my friend Halen....

Answer 10

As vague as this sounds..... It really depends on how open you want to be in your relationship and what kind of boundaries that you and your partner want to establish. OK, I guess i coulda just said, "To each his own babe."