When we argue he always says things that hurt my feelings is this how he really feels and he never says he is sorry, what should i do about this?
2006-07-29 15:52:17 · 12 answers · asked by twinki 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It is probably not how he really feels. People say things when they are mad/hurt that they don't mean. Bring it up to him (at a time you are not arguing) and let him know how you feel. Say it in a way in which you are not putting blame on him. Say something like "when you say ........ it makes me feel......" See what he says. Maybe he doesn't realize you need to hear he is sorry.
2006-07-29 16:02:05 · answer #1 · answered by NFL RULES 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Both of you should seek out an older, wiser, more mature individual to talk to you and set up some ground rules for having a face to face discussion about the rules of arguing. Men and women are different in many respects and emotionaly very different. Men can only usually think in a linear fashion and women can process different pieces of information at the same time. I have been married 36 years and still find it hard to argue with my wife. I say one thing and she hears it as something else. Much is lost in translation. Men tend to blow off steam and never realize what they are saying can be hurtful or spiteful. I do income tax work for a living and find that information received has to be very clear and concise. Women give me answers that make much more sense than men's answers. Women process information better than men. Of course I do worry about my sanity as I find doing tax work to be both interesting and fun. It can't be normal, can it? All people are different.
2006-07-29 16:07:39 · answer #2 · answered by acmeraven 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave! It will never get better, only worse. The fact that he never apologizes for hurting you means that 1) he thinks he is totally in the right and he doesn't see that he has done wrong, and 2) that he doesn't really give a damn about you or your feelings.
2006-07-29 16:01:45 · answer #3 · answered by Ms. GTO 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why don't you ask him if he means it! if he is putting you down thats mental abuse. You shouldnt have to put up with it. And if you say you put up with it because you love him then thats just crazy. Love doesnt hurt your feelings. I suppose if he never apologises then he means it. Kick his *** to the curb if you dont like it. Or just put up with it. Its all on you. Whats your instinct tell you?
2006-07-29 15:57:20 · answer #4 · answered by Christina D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
WELL BABYDOLL HES AN IMATURE A/H?WHAT CAN I SAY,F IT GIVE BACK THE SAME.AN EYE FOR AN EYE.IF HE HARMS YOU CALL THE STATE POLICE.OR GET OUT OF THE RELATIONSHIP,ITS ENDED.HE HAS LOST HIS RESPECT FOR YOU (SORRY).THERE ARE MEN OUT THERE THAT WILL STILL TREAT YOU LIKE A LADY,BELIEVE ME WERE STILL AROUND(DM)
2006-07-31 06:45:19 · answer #5 · answered by lickit4u 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Too bad you allowed him to ever start saying such things. Get him to stop fighting in such a way. Fight fair, no name calling. Threaten divorce.......and mean it.
2006-07-29 20:12:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
marriage counseling - or do you want to live the rest of your life having your feelings hurt????
2006-07-29 15:57:44 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do the same
2006-07-29 15:55:39 · answer #8 · answered by snow l 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find someone who respects you and loves you for you.
2006-07-29 15:57:14 · answer #9 · answered by carmen c 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe u and him should get into some marriage counseling together
2006-07-29 15:58:16 · answer #10 · answered by angel h 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋