howcome people only remember the bad?

Answer 1

that is what scares there memory

Answer 2

I don't think that is quite accurate. Take childbirth, for example. I remember laying there reminding myself over and over that "this sucks and I will never do it again." But, as time progressed, the memory of the pain faded. Yeah--they all say you forget, and you tell yourself, 'I am not going to forget because this **** hurts,' but you do. It is our nature for those "bad" things to get a little fuzzy after the years go by. That is why we forgive our parents in their old age, why we don't really hate the kid in school who made high school hell when our 20th reunion comes around, or why we are able to laugh at our mistakes in retrospect. I think if people only remember the bad, they are a pretty miserable lot with absolutely no joy in their lives. That is, in itself, a form of mental illness. Human beings typically hold on to good memories to prevent themselves from "going over the edge," if you will, when horrible things do occur. If you forgot the nice spring day you spent in the park in May, then there is no way you could get through minus-six-degrees in the middle of December! If you are finding that others only remember the bad things about YOU, then, it is time for you to meet new others or preoccupy yourself with the opinions of those who know the good. This is such a cliche, but "time heals all wounds." You will find, in time, that this is true... promise.

Answer 3

Natural Selection dictates that if you remember the stuff that can kill you, you will survive longer. For many many many years, remembering good or neutral just blocked things that could kill you.
Over time we now think of things that just come to mind and allow bad to fill our heads sometimes. Some people are better at suppressing it than others. And, every now and then, someone is born laughing and doesn't stop until they die long after they were born.
In summary, chemicals in the brain genetically gifted and inborn behavior from evolution.

Answer 4

actually brains take in everything and make impressions of them, good or bad.
then when people retrieve memories, the difference comes. the process of retrieving is mainly by relating groups of impressions. if a memory clip is not linked too much to any others, chances are you will never retrieve the memory...
This said, the retrieval process is highly impacted by the person's attitude and current state of mind. If he is has a general negative feeling about a person, then bad things keep jumping out on a chain of memories. However, it works the other way too if one holds general warm feeling of someone.

What you should work on, then, is to create a general upbeat atmosphere on things that you expect people to relate to good memories.

Answer 5

The bad leaves scars that are sometimes unforgettable. If you get caught up on all the things that hurt, the good things slip away between the cracks and by the time you remember that you had good things, its too late to hold on

Answer 6

Because as children we were told not to be bad. Being bad is not good, you could get punished.

And so we remember the times we were bad, more than the times we were good, because we do not wish to repeat the bad behavior and be punished.

People who hate themselves remember the bad more than good because it reinforces their feelings of failure.

If somebody close to you remembers all the bad stuff you have done, and recalls none of the good, than they do not like you, are not your friend, and I would stay away from them.

Answer 7

Its a survival tactic given to us by nature. If we only remembered the good things in life, we would not guard ourselves from the bad things. But if we keep remembering the bad things, we can learn from it and try to protect ourselves from it in the near future.

Answer 8

Actually people tend to forget the bad and remember the good. This biases them when they are older as they remember their childhood as being better than their present.

Answer 9

Please detail your questions a bit more huh? In themselves or in others????

In themselves:
Bescause typically negative things have a far greater impact on their lives. Case and point: How many beautiful sunny days do people in New Orleans recall??? vs. Hurricane Katrina??? Individuals too: Say a co worker who's a good friend moves away... vs. "Mom" dying... You see?

In others:
Because its always easier to focus upon flaws in others rather than admit to and/or change/improve upon flaws in ones self.

Answer 10

The bad hurts so deeply and leaves scars. Good is a wonderful feeling but it doesn't usually leave scars behind as a reminder.

Answer 11

Many are that way through conditioning in their upbringing. Seek out people who are optimists. Also I think many things are perceived as bad when they are not. Also people tend to narrow their interests and their pursuits and so they develop an aversion to many things.