he is always calling me telling me of all these diseases he has,or he`s been in the hospital for this or that,proceeds to tell me about his personal life,etc... he is an idiot!! whas ur opinion on this, what would u say?
2006-07-29 10:32:46 · 14 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
i do have 2 children by him and they live with their dad so what do i do u know
2006-07-29 10:42:41 · update #1
I disagree with all these answers. You have children and need open lines of communication with him for the kid's sake. When he starts to dump, tell him you have another call coming in and must take it. Tell him there is someone at the door and you must answer it. Tell him a pot is boiling over on the stove and you must hang up. Tell him the water is on in the tub and you have to hang up. Everytime the converstion strays to "poor, poor, pitiful me," find a quick, consistent reason and hang up. Eventually, you will break his habit of dumping on you without being offensive. This technique is guaranteed to work. You are on a phone, NOT in person...you can always end the conversation abruptly when it turns towards things you do not want to hear. You are in control of the conversation, not him. Use the control and extricate yourself from this tedious behavior....and it will not cause offense that may damage lines of communication between you and the kids. Good luck
2006-07-29 10:57:56 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I would ask him when exactly he thought it was that I snuck out and got my medical degree without him knowing it. Then I would tell him I don't care one way or the other what he has as long as I didn't catch it from him and then I would tell him his time would be better spent calling someone who gives a darn! Then I would hang up and change my number! Honestly, in order for him to do this you have to be sitting there listening to it and there are a few simple ways to avoid that, one is not to answer in the first place, another is to hang up when you hear that its him but I recommend caller id (it was sent from the Gods), I personally have been known to sit the phone down under a pillow and carry on with what I was doing, eventually they figure out you aren't there and thats a clue even to the biggest moron, another is to get yourself a nice whistle and blow it in his ear, he won't be able to hear well enough to use the phone anymore (LOL) but after that don't answer the door!
The kids make it a little more of a challenge but the same rules apply. He can't whine to you all the time if you don't listen. If he is talking to you about anything other than the kids you have to pee REALLY bad and you'll call him back when you get a minute, which of course you won't. He will eventually get over the dependancy he has on you and it will stop, its sort of like forced weaning. Good luck.
2006-07-29 17:37:02 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why does he have the kids? He sounds like he is not a stable person. If he does it again, I'd just be like "yeah, whatever..." and he'd get the picture and leave me alone. Don't react and he'll get bored with it.
2006-07-29 17:50:13 · answer #3 · answered by ? 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't answer the phone. Even though he is your ex, sounds like he is still dependant on you. He needs to find someone else to dump his problems on. He is your ex for a reason.
2006-07-29 17:36:33 · answer #4 · answered by creativefisher 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like he's trying the old "pity me please" ploy to get you to associate with him. Get caller ID and screen your calls. If that doesn't work or isn't an option, tell him to get well, hurry up and croak or pay a shrink to listen to it, those are his choices.
2006-07-29 17:38:11 · answer #5 · answered by justme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well to tell you the truth i think he is trying to scare you into either going back with him or he is trying to scare you in thinking you could have something to so you wont date anyone else. Just ignore him and go on with your life
2006-07-29 17:47:40 · answer #6 · answered by fordsrock_2005 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it is his way of telling you he wants you back and your listening to him acts as encouragement.
If you definitely want it to end, it is kinder to tell him there is no hope and to stop calling.
2006-07-29 17:48:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm thinking you left him, or you were the one who wanted to end it. I believe he is trying in this odd way, to get you back by making you feel pity or guilt.
2006-07-29 17:36:21 · answer #8 · answered by Michelle F 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him that you are interested to know about the kids, and not about his problems.
2006-07-29 18:14:21 · answer #9 · answered by the_memory_of_ashes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Tell him to get Friend. Cause you are not it. and stop answering the phone
2006-07-29 17:36:44 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋