Does anybody know how i can overcome shyness?

Question

I've always been quiet, and found it really hard to talk to people, i don't know. I find it really frustrating. Recently, my shyness has got a lot worse, as i experienced some bullying in my workplace, i now hardly say a word to anyone at work unless i'm actually spoken to. Its really starting to get me down, as i've always wanted to go into acting. I thought, about joining an amateur dramatic society to see if that would help me overcome my shyness, but not sure if that would really help.

Answer 1

I think if you join something that you enjoy it can variably help+there will people with simiar interest which can be the topic of your conversation.
were you a shy child?
please don't let bullying makes you loose heart-i know it is awful but please talk to somoene close about it-if i can help let me know as i can empathise with you.
My friend is quite shy but i ask her lots open questions +let her be herself as well-she is doing well.
Do have you anyone you can confide in?
try introducing youself+say something unique about yoursell+ask others about themselves as most of us like talking about ourselves.
Also do not put pressure on your self-take your time to get to know others.
I really think joining amateur dramatic society would defintely help you to express yourself verbally+mentally+physically-go for it.

Answer 2

Shyness is a quality of introversion, meaning you are more collective in your thoughts but less outgoing than some people. Introversion is something you cannot change, and to a degree, shyness will never completely go away. Try to be brave though, and know that if you take on a positive attitude and try being friendly to new people, they will most likely come to like you for who you are. Do not let bullying get you down, for people who bully generally do so out of their own insecurities, and they are not the people you want to befriend anyways. Just try saying "hi" to someone new, and put on a happy face. I'm sure if you strike up a little bit of confidence you'll have nothing to worry about. =)

p.s. a good way to make new friends is to try a new activity, such as auditioning for a play or joinging a choir or doing a sport. new activities bring people together who share common interets, so are a great way to meet people similar in nature to you.

Answer 3

I'm considered "reserved" which a bit like shyness. I've found that the level of shyness can depend on confidence. If you join the amateur dramatic society and find you enjoy it and find that you have talent in drama, it might help draw you out more.

If that doesn't work, try focusing on something your good at. At work, talk about subjects your familiar with or ask questions about subjects other maybe experts in. Everybody like having someone listen to them.

Answer 4

I used to be very shy like you in high school. Everyone just thought I was super smart. Social skills are not that hard to develop. You sound like a very passive person that lets people walk over you or won't voice your opinion. The way I over came this is putting myself in a position where I had to speak to other people. Take small steps first so you get comfortable talking to someone one on one. Try volunteering and doing other community type activities. I was a camp councilor for a long time. Take a speech or debate class to help gain confidence in your speaking. If you think that it's something you can't do on your own then I would look into going to therapy sessions to see why your like this. I have a good reason why I was shy and got over it so maybe you just need to work through something that's hindering you from being able to communicate.

Answer 5

I recently had a job at the lovely world of Wal-Mart. I'm incredibly shy too and I large crowds scare me to death. But when you put yourself in a situation where you're surrounded by people you slowly grow accustomed to it.

Within the first week they made me be a door greeter for an hour. I wanted to shoot myself at first. But it was my job (and no I am NOT the 80 year old man that greets everyone!!! I'm 23! lol) I had to say ,"Hello" to everyone that walked by. I was shy but that was what they were paying me for. Before I left I was comfortable enough to talk to anyone. And in that envronment they're paying you to be friendly to EVERYONE. So I left there still talking to strangers on the sidewalk and making eye contact until I realized... I'm off work... I don't have to do this anymore!

I don't work there anymore but it was a good way to come out of my shell and it boosted my confidence as well.

So, put yourself in a situation that will ease you into talking to people. Most of the world is just as insecure as you are. We are all simply just trying to get by. So trying to find an activity that will push you closer to the spotlight is an excellent idea.

If you can get by without zoloft or paxil that is good. Sometimes there isn't anyway around it. But while they help a lot of people they still have very dangerous side effects for others and can be very difficult to quit after you've started them.

Good luck!

Answer 6

I can completely relate to this as i have always found it difficult to talk to people unless I know them really well and this is kind of a vicious circle as some people get the wrong idea that i am a 'snob', but really just very shy. It has gotten better in the last few years, as i started uni and made better friends, and funnily enough i too have been interested in acting, which people have found hard to believe as i have a self confidence problem! My suggestion is to go for the acting class, and if it does not work out, then at least you have tried. Try and persuade a friend to go with you. Good luck!! x x

Answer 7

You're fear is coming inside your own head.

Take a little step each week to try and remove it... Perhaps whilst in the supermarket queue do something silly like a loud burp or whatever. Something quick and easily covered over with an "oh excuse me"

Silly things are easy to do and the more times you have people look at you the less and less you'll feel about how they are re-acting to you.

Self confidence needs to replace your shyness. It's easier to hard in the corner but I'm sure that you've got a lot to say need to give yourself the opportunity to say it.

Good luck

Answer 8

Nat,
I feel your pain, it is hard when you are shy.
I have always been shy, still am to an extent, but I got involved in amateur dramatics in my hometown a few years ago with my brother who is full of confidence, and I worked behind the scenes never on stage.....you'd be surprised how much confidence you'll pick up once things get rolling and you see the fruits of your labour. ( I even managed to thread the boards and sing solo after a bit, now there is no stopping me) I know it will be hard to take the first step but maybe take a friend or a family member with you, might ease the scare factor of being on your own. Try approaching it as a character, but be yourself, everyone has shy moments and fears.

Enjoy it, its all for fun and frolicks :)

Good Luck

Answer 9

Shyness and social anxiety can make life incredibly difficult. Socializing is one of life's great pleasures, but it is denied to many people.

Shyness is a natural part of growing up, but for many people it doesn't end with their teenage years. Social anxiety can persist into adulthood so that making friends and establishing a social circle is incredible painful if not impossible.

In most cases, the heightened emotions of socializing when young simply condition the sufferer to respond to social events with fear, instead of excitement and pleasure.

This reaction becomes automatic and the sufferer feels powerless to do anything about it.

Why hypnosis works for social anxiety and shyness

Luckily, hypnosis is unbeatable at re-educating the unconscious, or 'back part' of the mind to respond in new ways.

Overcoming Shyness and Social Anxiety allows the unconscious mind to rehearse social situations whilst relaxed and in control, gently removing the automatic fear response.

After experiencing the download one or more times, you will find:

* You surprise yourself with your spontanaity
* You are able to relax much more in social situations
* Your anxiety levels beforehand go way down
* You really begin to enjoy socializing

We are not promising 'miracle cures' here, but this download is so effective, we are sure you will notice the differences very quickly.

And as you start to realise that you can actually enjoy social situations, the snowball will be off and rolling!

Answer 10

thats a tough one, im quite shy and never used to be able to have proper conversations with anyone.
for me i had to realise that i had no reason to be shy or feel different to anyone else because thats when you can start to believe in yourself.
i had a complete change when a while back i bumped into an old friend i hadnt seen for years and i decided i had nothing to lose in asking for her number and if she wanted to catch up over a drink sometime so i did and we are now really close friend and through her i have made so many friend and have contacted other old friends. it was the best thing ive ever done for myself as i decided to just be myself and say wot i thought and now i am much more confident.
obviously this doesnt happen much so i would suggest you either try calling an old friend or joining a club that you would find interesting.
just go for it and youll be amazed how easy it actually is even though it may seem like the hardest thing you could do.

Answer 11

maybe take a speech class at a community college. that way you have to speak in front of a group of people and after you do it for a little while you will start to feel more confident. i have always been really shy, but i found that i am less shy at work because i feel like i have an identity and it gives me confidence. if you were bullyed at work tho, your situation is different. i dont know the situation,but if it was from coworkers, you might want to mention it to your supervisor. and also keep the mindset that you are important, and that what anyone else says about you doesnt matter, its your opinion of yourself that matters. that helped me a little in feeling more confident.