my husband has ignored me for three weeks playing video games. he spoke to me about 10 minutes yesterday and played games all day. he came home last night and left the bedroom to watch south park. my heart is broke! yes, i keep; a clean house; yes, i wear make up and try to be exciting; yes, i am ready for romance. every day i keep getting ignored. we live out in the country and i am trapped by screens. i want to live life and enjoy my husband but he only cares about video games or trash television. on top of that, i am a christian woman who wants to read the bible with her husband but he doesn't have time for that... only video games! i am very lonely and sad all the time. i feel like i have no good qualities either, since he puts me down with names while angry, too. my emotions are a mess. i feel so unloved! if he would play an hour a day i would be happy but its.... like 10 to 12 hours a day!!! no kidding, i feel so lonely and don't know what to do.
2006-07-29 00:35:24 · 17 answers · asked by sherryberry 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Say, "I sure miss you."
Ask, "Are you happy with our marriage?
2006-07-29 00:44:19 · answer #1 · answered by sadie_oyes 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
First of all, you don't need your husband to read the Bible with you. You can read the Bible on your own. It sounds like you are trying to force him into being someone he just isn't right now. Are you nagging him about not reading the Bible and about playing video games and the TV shows that he likes to watch? Nagging is a very unattractive quality and will only drive him further away from you.
Don't think your husband hasn't noticed how much you disapprove of him and how little you respect him. But what can you do since he isn't earning your respect right now? Give it to him anyway. Treat him as if he were the man you wish him to be. Don't hold back any affection or words of encouragement or flattery or kindness. Focus on being the woman you need to be, on being the very best wife possible--even though he doesn't deserve it. The response you get back will be much more pleasant and lead you much closer to the marriage you desire than if you nag and push and disapprove. If you focus on what you can do (instead of what you can't get him to do), you will feel less powerless and discouraged.
If you are truly a Christian woman, you should know that you are loved completely by God and that you can give your husband (with all his shortcomings) into the hands of God. Let go of your expectations and start being thankful for every good thing that you do have. As best you can, reach out beyond yourself to help other people and focus on their hurts and needs. That will help to take care of the loneliness and depression.
2006-07-29 07:53:04 · answer #2 · answered by happygirl 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to communicate all of these things with your husband. It is threatening your marriage. Do you both attend church? Talk with your priest or pastor and seek support. Perhaps a third neutral party facilitating communication between you two can help, but try to talk to your husband on your own first. There have got to be bible study groups and other things for you to do even in you do live in the country. Find some activities that will fulfill your life, too. Just pleasing your husband won't be fulfilling enough. Think about what you need. It will make you happier and perhaps even stronger as a couple.
2006-07-29 08:26:11 · answer #3 · answered by viclyn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well dear I feel for you. Sadly there are too many husbands who cant grow up or become adult. Is he faithful? Anyone who puts someone down is projecting their own self image onto someone else because they cannot face the reality of their own condition.
You are I would guess a good wife and a decent person. First off pray. Consult with a girlfriend sister good neighbor. See what they think and either talk to your minister or ask specific questions here.
Take each aspect of his (your husband) behavior and examine it very carefully. Something is killing his self esteem. Does he work? Hes putting you down but it himself that he hates.
Does he have a strong family? Are you close to them? Have a talk with his mother if she is approachable.
Break the TV. Best wishes. How long have you been married?
Children? Come back to Yahoo Answers and we'll see what happens. Tak care!
2006-07-29 07:51:49 · answer #4 · answered by Ahab 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why don't you:
1. ignore him for about 1 week
2. pray over for him as you read your bible
3. let him miss you sometime, go out for a while
4. have a change of looks to attract him
5. you need to talk if things remain the same after
1-4 advices.
that video fever he is into may just pass by, that's better than a third party problem. God bless your family.
2006-07-29 08:00:52 · answer #5 · answered by cHaStiTy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hmmm..how long has he been doing such? if its just 3 weeks ago, then there might be something bothering him or maybe has problems with you? Have you tried to ask /talked to him already?
but since you have mentioned that you're a Christian, so i believe that you have been a good wife to him... just keep the faith, continue being an understanding and loving wife(though its not really easy), pray hard, and the Lord will answer you.
...have a story to share, there was this religious mother and her daughters who never lose hope for 10 yrs of praying for their drunkard, womanizer dad to come back... and yes, after 10 long years, God tapped their dad and he returned home, apologizing for what he did to his family and now a church leader=) isn’t that amazing? God works in mysterious ways…just believe. God bless you! I’ll include you in my prayers!
2006-07-29 07:51:13 · answer #6 · answered by FaBuLoUsElYwEiRd 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow, he is really addicted to video games, I suppose he would rather live in that fantasy world than the real one. I can only suggest a marriage counselor. You may have to find some outside activities to keep yourself busy and make yourself less lonely, you must be active in your church join some committees, or do some volunteering, or maybe take some classes.
2006-07-29 07:40:51 · answer #7 · answered by Jim C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well.. if I were you.. I think I would start going out with my girlfriends and just leave him be. Go to your local mall, go to a movie, go out and eat or just anything (within your standards) to have a little bit of fun in your life. Make new friends, enjoy some aspect of your life because life is too short. If he doesnt notice that you are finding happiness in your life and doesnt seem to care, then it may be time to move out. Good luck. HONESTLY.. LIFE IS TOO SHORT TO BE MISERABLE.
2006-07-29 07:43:47 · answer #8 · answered by Peanut Butter 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Face it, honey.......he is not into you! He may have a girlfriend. You need to seek out a counselor and decide how you want to live the rest of your life. You sound mismatched. You are not going to change him.....you are stuck. Forget this notion of "tell him how you feel"........he is dug in and your life is miserable. Stop wasting time on him and your miserable life. Either you have to change or stop whining. He sounds like a looser but hopefully, there is hope for you.
2006-07-29 07:41:32 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, since he wont talk to you or acknowledge you then I would tell him that you are getting a divorce.
see if that will get him to talk.
go to a counselor without him.
i dont understand why people marry before addressing the sex issue, how much and how often they like it to happen????
and since you want to read the bible did you discuss this issue at all?
how long you been married???
obviously he dont love you or want to be married!!!
I would say its time to get a divorce and live your life, my 2 sisters got divorce after 13 and 18yr of marriage and they are lot happier.
we all deserve to be happy!!! so get the divorce and be happy again.!!!!
2006-07-29 07:49:57 · answer #10 · answered by cats3inhouse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should let him know how you are feeling other wise this will become damaging to your relationship. It already has started to. You could walk around in the house in some scimpie lingerie and walk in front of the tv, but when he notices tell him your busy!
2006-07-29 08:02:58 · answer #11 · answered by michiganwife 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋