ok so i like this guy alot. but the thing is he has a gf but we talk on the phone a few times a week and he told me that he does still like me and stuff. and hes also 4 years older than me which kinda makes it harder as well. but he reallie is a good guy, so dont look at it the wrong way. but what should i do?
2006-07-28 19:44:08 · 11 answers · asked by <3 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
his gf knows that we talk on the phone and stuff, she doesnt care.
2006-07-28 19:49:20 · update #1
As long as the girlfriend is cool with you two being friends I say talk to him. However, I wouldn't pursue a relationship until she was gone. 4 years is not that bad. My husband is 7 years older than me and our relationship is fine. If you like him, just wait... you never know what will happen. I wouldn't limit myself to just him. Go out and have some fun with others. If he really likes you, he will take the initiative to get with you.
2006-07-28 20:01:31 · answer #1 · answered by mrslang1976 4 · 3⤊ 1⤋
The big warning signal, red flag, alarm bell, and what have you should be that he has a gf. If he likes you, the first thing that should happen is he should break up with her. If he doesn't, he is just playing you... playing with your emotions, and your life. Bottom line, if he likes you, and is encouraging you in any way, he should respect you enough to not have you be the "other woman."
A couple other thoughts, learned from experience... Ask yourself, right now, if he is treating his gf this way, how is he going to treat you if you start dating? First of all, he is showing her no respect at all by liking you and telling you so and not breaking up with her. If she is his gf, she should be important enough to him that he would want to at least let her know he likes someone else. Second of all, if you guys start dating, he will not change. If he is "cheating" or whatever on his gf with you, what makes you think he won't do the same to you, with another girl. Trust me, odds are he will.
So what do you do? Since you really believe he is a good guy, and since you seem to communicate really well, your best bet is to talk to him. Explain how you feel, ask what he feels about you, and try to figure out where to go from there. If he says he does like you, make it very clear that you are not going to anything with him, that passes the boundaries of friendship, until he breaks up with his gf. The next step is to stick to it. Many guys just want another girl waiting in the wings, and when confronted, choose not to break up with their gf. I am not saying he is not a great guy, but he does need to prove to you that he is. You are worthy of a wonderful guy that respects you, and a solid relationship, if that is what you want. Don't settle for 2nd best, it's a hard place to be. Good luck to you :)
2006-07-28 19:56:41 · answer #2 · answered by Stephanie 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well if u r sure this guy likes u really a lot then u might wanna wait for him to come to you and break up with his girlfriend. If ever he is really into u then he will definetly come to you. But what he is doing to his girlfriend is not fair coz he says he likes u but is still goin out with someone else so u might wanna think really if he is a really good guy after all. So i would not think too much about him if i were u.
By the way thanks for answering my question :)
2006-07-29 06:36:19 · answer #3 · answered by olde finnn 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hmm. Well it's totally OK if you like him. But he's taken, so don't try to do anything yet. If you do-his girl will suspect something's up. So just play it cool but when he dumps her-or she dumps him, ask him if MAYBE he would like to date you one day. He said he likes you-so he'll probably say yes.
It's OK if he's 4 years older than you I guess. Since you didnt say how old you were, I'm guessing your old enough to date this guy without him having to commit a felony.
2006-07-28 19:48:37 · answer #4 · answered by sweetdollツ 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
advice? get away from him. seriously, why would you bother talking to a guy with a girlfriend on the phone. how would you feel if it was the other way around and you found out your boyfriend was talking to some other girl behind your back.
2006-07-28 19:47:13 · answer #5 · answered by loveladyelectric 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'll try to take it the right way.....It seems that either A. This guy is getting tired of his g/f and looking for a soft place to land when he ditches her....OR B. He has no intention of leaving her and is just flirting with you and possibly wants to hook up with you behind the girlfriend's back....
In either case you have a choice. If he is wanting to leave his girlfriend...you can: 1. Wait for him to break up with her and then you are free to pursue the relationship 2. Tell him to make up his mind and give him an ultimatum (its either her or me).
If he isn't talking about breaking up with his girlfriend. you can either 1. Tell him that if he wants to hook up with you....he has to break up with his girlfriend first OR 2. Let him seduce you....convince you that he is a good guy....and end up hurting the other woman or getting hurt yourself....
2006-07-28 19:54:53 · answer #6 · answered by hersh108 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm sure this guy does like you, April. He also likes his girlfriend. I think he is using you for a little "phone action," and I also think you should move on. If he's such a good guy, why is he talking to you behind his girlfriend's back?
2006-07-28 19:47:38 · answer #7 · answered by No Shortage 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have a very close friend (female) whos married and we talk on the phone chat and send emails. Just bid your time maybe fate will see it your way. If you really like him don't ever give up.
2006-07-28 19:48:13 · answer #8 · answered by herbs411_42719 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The fact that he talks to you a couple of times every week means he likes you!
Keep talkin & slowly and steadily you will go deeper into his heart!
2006-07-28 19:51:59 · answer #9 · answered by Cool Guy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
why do u expect that he can not have friendship with boys or girls for the sake of it.
i think u can separate love and friendship.
2006-07-28 20:18:01 · answer #10 · answered by Kumar 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋