I messed up and SEMI cheated on my boyfriend, He wants nothing to do with me, WHAT DO I DO???

Question

I didn't actually have sex with anyone else, actually what I did involved the internet. It was nothing pornographic, but it was sexual. Being that I will hide nothing from him, I told him less than an hour afterwards. He'd been neglecting me for the past week and I've been stressed out and upset and needing him and he hasn't even cared. Now he tells me hes disgusted by me and wants nothing to do with me ever again. He is my ENTIRE life and I've heard the no man is worth it and so on, but he truly IS, and I don't need any girl power or anything I need to know how to deal with this, how to get through until I can change his mind and HOW I can change his mind... please help me

Answer 1

We all make mistakes. It is up to us to not to repeat it. It is up to our loved ones to understand and forgive.

Answer 2

Trust is hard to regain once it's been broken. And even though you feel you only "semi" broke that trust, apparently he doesn't. He needs time. Really so do you. What you did may have been just playful, innocent, etc. but, you were definitely flirting with the opposite sex when you already had a guy. What's up with that? Meaning.....there is a reason for that. Maybe you should back up, take this time to re-evaluate what happened to you for a minute huh? Don't just act instinctively because now you may lose him. You know the old saying.......If this blows the relationship out of the water....you had holes in the boat already. If you can work through it....take time, patch things up so to speak, then, your both back at sea looking at the sunset. And maybe now with a reinforced sail.

Answer 3

You need to stop with the Bill Clinton definition of sex, what the hell is semi cheating? Cheating is cheating whether be it physical, verbal or Internet. How would you feel if he was having sexual conversations with other women? You were getting pleasure from and giving pleasure to someone else and that is wrong. The only thing you can do is apologize and hope he forgives you, just give him time to calm down. And honey no man should be your ENTIRE life, you have to save some of you for yourself.

Answer 4

If being neglected for a week means you turn to another person--it's time to move on. Everyone has bad weeks in relationships but that doesn't excuse seeking out another person and expecting your significant other to accept it. You have a right to choose your behavior, he has a right to choose his reaction.

Cheating is considered cheating whether it's actually done in person or not and it sounds like you and he have different opinions on cheating. I would take it as a live and learn lesson. He probably believes he can no longer trust you. Give him the courtesy of a decent apology and walk away for now.

Answer 5

Yeah that's not right...you may think that you didn't cheat but the harsh reality is that you did....even if it involves the internet you solicited sexual things from another...just as bad as cheating..the thought shouldn't even have crossed your mind..and i am not surprised that he wants nothing to do it may be for the better...and another thing i don't get...if this guy is your whole life then why did you feel he neglected you enough for you to have to "get it" somewhere else....if he was your whole life you would have talked to him bout what was going on and not just gone for sex...and i don't think you will ever change his mind....one a cheater always a cheater....so that may be what hes sees you asfrom now on and wants nothng to do with it..

Answer 6

If you are the only one of the two who feels that way about the other, what does that tell you? Then again if he was/is your everything than why cybersex with someone else? He has a good point of being disgusted with you. Not so much for cybersexing but for your claim that it didn't mean all that, by which you in fact say of yourself that you don't mean all that. But more so for putting the blame on him for neglecting you. It was you who forgot about you totally in your stupid moment. Get all of that straight first. Because cybersexing is no statement of love to your bf and no excuse for neglect on his behalf. There really are better ways to say love or to let him know that you want him.

Best strategy is to admit that to yourself first and then tell him that you were wrong and you learned your lesson. If he doesn't respond to the fact that you are fighting for him, you should know what time it is. Life is hard and we all make mistakes.

Best of luck to you.

Answer 7

You really messed up big time.

You should find some time when you won't be disturbed and tell your boyfriend........... you made a very stupid mistake and you are so sorry that you betrayed his trust in you. You don't know why you did it but it will never happen again. then acknowledge that he may need more than a week to think it through. Then back off and give him some time. I hope he gives you another chance.

Answer 8

If his mind is as small as you describe it then you had better consider moving on to a more mature and understanding model than the one you have. You are not perfect, he is not perfect and as hard as it is for me to believe, even I am not perfect. If we live in a glass bubble all the time life becomes quite boring. Dare to have an original thought and do what you want as long as it harms nobody else. You don't have to answer to him or anybody else as you are really just your own person.

Answer 9

Nothing is going to change his mind, except his brain. You need to either wait for him to accept your "semi-cheating" and don't pursue it any further...the more you beg, the farther away you'll push him. Why you even brought something as petty as that to his attention, probably made him think you were far more guilty of other more 'intense cheating. Cut your losses and move on, if he decides to forgive you....then it was meant to be; otherwise, learn from your mistakes.

Answer 10

hun, i think you made up your mind when you decided to do something on the internet that he wouldn't agree with...you shouldn't have done what you did and all you can tell him is that you're sorry and that it won't happen again...it's up to him where the relationship goes after that...plus you need to give him time to get over the shock of what you did...maybe after he's had a couple of weeks or something he'll change his mind but i wouldn't push him because then you might not ever get him back...

Answer 11

The only thing that you can do is be honest and open on why you did what you did. It sounds to me like he is hurt and disappointed by what you did. I would give him a little time to himself where he can think about things and that should give him a chance to maybe realize that it really isn't worth losing you. I hope this all works out for you!