HELP best friend toubles,please?.?

Question

One of my friends lies about everything like smoking(she never quit)and my other best friend keeps blowing me off for our other friend (she did it on my B-day)and the smoker wants to go out w/my bestfriend's(the one that blows me off)ex bf.
this is making me sad should I tell them that?
This is serious and I don't know what to do it is confusing to an 12 yr. old.

Answer 1

All you can do is tell them how you feel and that by lying it only makes it worse and that they shouldnt be so immature, which can be hard when you are only 12. But if your friend is 12 like you and smokes maybe you could help her quit because there are alot of health risks involved no matter how cool she thinks it makes her look. And going out with friends ex's is never ok, no matter how old you are.

Answer 2

O.K. sounds like you could be a little bit on the controlling side. That's why they may blow you off. Try being there friend instead of telling them you can't smoke and all this stuff. I mean I agree with you don't get me wrong I don't think she should be smoking at 12, but if you want to be friends then you have to except your friends for better or worse.

Answer 3

Have a girlfriend chat. Don't Leave anyone out have an open discussion. As for the smoker --- don't pressure her--- help her! as I tell my children the best way not to quit something is to never smoke. It's difficult not to but you can get her to limit it if you agree that she doesn't smoke in the car or in your house/apartment. even when its hot/cold out side she has to go outside. But if you love her enough get her the patches or the gum along with an explanation of what you feel and why( not just that it can kill or that it stinks). As for the one that wants the others ex that is a no-no, tell her.

Answer 4

Honey, these girls are not your friends - and I'm sorry, I know that's hard. You deserve better than someone who lies to you or ditches you on your birthday. And do you really want to hang out with girls that smoke? It's okay to be sad, that's part of life. They don't deserve the time or energy to tell them how you feel. If they cared about you, they wouldn't do this in the first place. Find some friends who enjoy the same things you do - and who don't smoke and chase after each others' boyfriends!!!

Answer 5

You are twelve and have a friend that has been smoking so long that she can't quit, another who has a boyfriend and yet another who is trying to steal friend two's boyfriend?!? Believe me, this is serious, but not in the way you think it is. Just for some perspective, when I was twelve years old, the only smokers I knew were grown ups, I spent my days hanging out with my friends (who had no boyfriends or girlfriends), getting into trouble picking on their younger brothers and sisters, swimming, playing sports, etc. You are way too grown up for twelve. Please, please, please find some friends who are your age who act your age and drop these other kids who have grown up way too fast. Otherwise, you are all headed for big trouble (specifically, teen pregnancy, drug abuse, trouble with the law, etc.) and will wish in a few short years that you had your innocence back. May God bless and keep you.

Answer 6

Do not be confused. Friends that do those things are not real friends. Friends stick it out with you no matter what happens. Leave it, and one day they will realize that they were wrong, and they will come back to you. Get your own life. But don't ignore them when they approach you. You have said what you need to say to them, there not much you can do. You are still young, you will meet lots of more people, and one day you will realize that you got a REAL friend.

Answer 7

you really need to talk too them. first of all, your smoker friend-- sounds waaaay too young to be smoking-- like even illegally. is she 12/13 also? second of all, the one that blows you off-- isn't your true best friend. i have a friend that i used to consider a best friend-- who lies about EVERY SINGLE THING. from having her driver's license, to a car, to having a job, etc etc etc. finally-- i got sick of it. she's not worth my time nor my friendship if she doesn't think it's a priority to be honest and upfront with me.

but you really need to talk to your girls hun-- and if they're even MORE mean too you, or decide that they don't want to be your friends anymore-- it's THEIR loss, and take it as a favor from them that they "let you go." believe me-- you do NOT want to be brought into nor brought DOWN by all the stuff they do. it's not a good path for you too go down. you're focused, you got your mind in the right place and you know what you want don't want along with what your needs are-- and don't get mixed up with these girls and their actions.

i hope this helped you hun!! good luck sweetie!!

Answer 8

I've been in situations like that this year. And what I did was come right out and I told my friend. I told her how I felt and I told her how she had been treating me and how that hurt. She didn't care, so I was like whatever to you. And I just moved on and found new and better friends.

So I think you should tell your friends how you feel. And if they don't care, you know that they're not true friends. It might be hard to move on, but it would be for the better. And don't worry. Everyone's been in situations like these. I hope things work out, and if not I hope you find better friends!

Answer 9

ASK YOURSELF: DO I WANT TO BE LIKE THESE PEOPLE? AM I THAT KIND OF PERSON? AM I HAPPY IN THIS FRIENDSHIP?

THESE ARE NOT BEST FRIENDS!! I THINK YOU KNOW THE DIFFERENCE FROM RIGHT AND WRONG. AND YOU DON'T HAVE TO ACCEPT THEIR BAD BEHAVIOR OR SMOKING JUST TO BE FRIENDS. REAL FRIENDS WOULD CARE ABOUT YOU, TOO.

IF YOU TALK TO THEM WHAT DO YOU THINK THEY WILL SAY IF THEY'RE BLOWING YOU OFF NOW? IT SEEMS LIKE THEY ARE TRYING TO GET RID OF YOU FOR WHATEVER REASON.

I PERSONALLY WOULD NOT LET THIS HURT MY FEELINGS. I WOULD PUT A LOT OF DISTANCE BETWEEN MYSELF AND THEM. DUMP THEM AND START LOOKING FOR MUCH BETTER FRIENDS!! I KNOW THERE ARE A LOT OF GOOD PEOPLE OUT THERE.

WHAT WILL EVENTUALLY HAPPEN IS THEY WILL GET IN TROUBLE AND TAKE YOU DOWN WITH THEM. THIS WILL HAVE TO BE YOUR CHOICE... USE YOUR GOOD SENSE AND DO WHAT YOU FEEL IS THE RIGHT THING.

Answer 10

Sounds like you need new best friends. If you're all close, you should be able to ask them what's going on. Tell them the way they're acting is hurting your feelings and therefore your friendship. If they care about you, they will stop. If not, it's time to dump them and make new friends.