My father loves my fiance like a son, but he thinks we are too young to get married(we are both 18), however, he proposed to me and we are getting married as of next year, I am not sure how to tell my father, any ideas?
2006-07-28 09:19:53 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I think that before you announce your engagement, your fiance should speak with your father and ask if he can marry you. You need to take steps to ensure that you have good reason to get married - that it's not going to be just a two-year marriage...
Your dad needs to be confident taht you are going to be taken care of. But, I am old fashioned, and I think that he should ask your father...
2006-07-28 09:24:59 · answer #1 · answered by Kerr 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Just tell him and by the way you are too young. But since you will anyway at least make an informed decision. Have you actually thought about what being married means or are you just hung up in the fairy tale. Here are some things to think about because this is whats real:
You should think about getting married when you have been together long enough to be out of the infatuation stage. When you have discussed ALL the issues involved in life after the wedding like finances, division of household labor, children, in laws, where to live, jobs, time away with friends, and since you are so young continuing education so you can actually support a family these days (do you have ANY idea how much things cost) and a million other things you haven't thought of. After all of that you consider each part of the vows, and what you consider is the difficult side of them, anybody can be happy when things are going well so,
richer or poorer....still want to be with him in a shack with crackers ala peanut butter for dinner?
sickness and health...he develops a chronic physical or mental illness and can't get around and can't work, still want to be with him?
better or worse...he's in a car accident and you have to spend the rest of your life feeding him and changing his diapers, still want to be married?
keep yourself only to her, can you REALLY only have sex with only him until you die?
THIS is what marriage is, not a fairy tale where everything goes well everyday, the one guarantee you have is that things WILL go wrong. Remember, you answer all these questions after you have passed infatuation, after you know what his bad points are (yes he has some and so do you) and still consider it anyway.
If you think you are up for all of this then maybe you should think about it. But first get a realistic idea of the cost of living, rent, water, sewage, gas, electric, cable, food, car payments, insurance. Look around your house and look at everything then figure out what it costs, ask your dad how much utility bills are, check the local paper to figure out how much rent is for descent place, how are a couple of 19 year olds going to pay for it all?
good luck, also check out the questions from married people posted here and don't think that they didn't feel the same way you do now when they got married. what would you do if these things happened in your relationship?
2006-07-28 09:27:02 · answer #2 · answered by dappersmom 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As a father, I can tell you that no matter how much he likes your fiance, no one will ever be good enough for his little girl. That being said, I'd say put on the brakes a little. At 18, even though you think you've experienced life, you may not have. You might be ready if you can define every trait and charachteristic you'd want in the perfect mate. Most people have to experience life, dating included, to discover that. And that takes time. So go ahead and be engaged. Just don't be in such a hurry to get to the altar. Give it some time, and be sure. Good luck, and my condolences to your dad! :)
2006-07-28 11:20:22 · answer #3 · answered by Mike 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You and your boyfriend should tell your father together, after all this is a partnership. You both should have answer for your father on how you plan to spend your lifes together (meaning how you'll support each other). Always be honest with your parents....now your an adult and one day you'll want to be treated the same way. You have alot going for you both if your father already likes him. Good luck
2006-07-28 09:31:32 · answer #4 · answered by Susan O 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Send your father a card that explains your marriage. Your his daughter and he loves u. He'll exept! N 18 is not too young for marriage and long as u & ur fiance can afford for each other and love each other!
2006-07-28 09:28:15 · answer #5 · answered by v.ballerr <3 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you are definitely too young! But if you decided to get married :( just tell your father about it- what's the problem? Where is your mom, by the way?
2006-07-28 09:33:28 · answer #6 · answered by Babz M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i don't think that age has any thing to do with it .my sister's friend got married at 19 and that lasted for 15 years un till he went out. it is what is in your heart that count's, so juse tell your dad , you never know he mighi just say ok.
2006-07-28 09:37:34 · answer #7 · answered by daydreamer_bgi 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you're afraid of telling daddy that you're engaged, you're probably NOT mature enough to be getting married!
2006-07-28 09:26:16 · answer #8 · answered by thersa33 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well since ur father likes him just sit down with ur dad and fiance and disscuse ur problem and tell ur dad it is one o fur dream come true lololololol
2006-07-28 09:26:28 · answer #9 · answered by asma 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dad, I am getting married. I'll be honored for you to give me away.
2006-07-28 09:44:40 · answer #10 · answered by Amelia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋