Things were wonderful when we werent working (we spent every moment devoting eachother to one another, LOTTS & LOTTS of sex), but as soon as we got jobs things started to crumble. We never see eachother until the end of the day (i know that is normal), when we get home (usually around 9pm, we leave the house at 8am) i am soo tired i just want to eat and go to sleep. Needless to say our sex life fell into a slump (now only onece a day every other day, & on weekends). It really doesnt bother me too much, but to him the world is ending if we dont have sex EVERY day. It also seems that the romancing has also dwindled. i just want things to be how they onece were. i love him with all of my heart but he has told me that i dont satisfy him anymore. i dont want to give up on this. i want it to work... do you have any suggestions on how i can go about mending this situation... Please help...i feel like the 1 thing that i care about so much is slipping away...i feel so very lost right now
2006-07-28 06:31:15 · 10 answers · asked by miss me! 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I put this in Marrige & Divorce because i thought that someone who is married might have better advise, than some of the teenagers that coem on this site...
2006-07-28 06:35:33 · update #1
i know that realtionships are more than sex, its just that this is the only thing that he is complaining about... im 21 & he is 25
2006-07-28 06:41:29 · update #2
Well, your man needs to know that his penis will not fall off if you and him don't have sex every day. I mean, come on, this is his problem really. This is how life goes, I mean, you have to work if you ever want anything in life. All you get out of having sex is some 3 second organsms and maybe children if you're not careful. Think about your future for a minute. If things are like this now, and he is complaining, what is he going to be like when you get married or when children come in to the picture? I'm not saying dump him or anything, I just think that he needs to be a little more considerate for your feelings.
2006-07-28 06:37:52 · answer #1 · answered by Littlemissy 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your relationship may or may not be over with. That good both of you have jobs. Don't have sex with anyone with the ring on your finger. He might got somebody else. It sound like you was he used you for your body.
I recommended you to buy these books.
1. Avoiding Mr. Wrong-Stephen Arterburn
2. Finding Mr. Right-same authors & Meg Rinck
Men can give sex without feeling love but it the opposite for women.Women are emotional. That how God made us.
I think you should move on. Work at your job, go to school, and definetly get into a good church home. So you stay strong. It not easy especially in this sex society world. Read these books and learn.It has helped me. I'm not involved with nobody right now but I'm preparing myself.
Other Good books are
1. Every Young Woman's Battle by
- Shannon Ethridge
It normal to feel love. We are desire love. Anything a man don't have to work for he won't value it.
2006-07-28 06:46:40 · answer #2 · answered by tasha 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't say I can relate to where he's coming from. It's a cliché, but isn't there supposed to be more to the relationship than sex? Sounds like you guys are still having sex very often, especially considering that you've been together for 2 years. I think it's time for you two to re-evaluate your relationship goals. If sex is the main attraction for him, you will have to be constantly giving in to his desires to maintain the relationship; is it something you're prepared to do? Most people don't have sex every day - they work, raise kids, and what's not. I think, it would be very difficult to live with a person who put one thing before all else; in the real world, one just has to be flexible. What is it that you both want out of this relationship? What things are important? Regardless of sex, it would probably be helpful for you guys to get on the same page in general. I don't know the whole story, but sounds to me like he doesn't value this relationship as much as he values sex every day - and this isn't good.
2006-07-28 06:48:10 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You sound really young. Relationships are not solely about sex - that would be completely boring. I'm 28 and my husband is 36 - he works nights, I work days. Sometimes we only see each other for an hour a day at lunch, and for a few hours on the weekends. You make the best of it. Hopefully there's more to your relationship then the physical because when the day is done, sometimes just cuddling with the person is completely satisfying. Your boyfriend sounds even younger then you, and extremely immature. Don't make plans to marry this one.
2006-07-28 06:45:31 · answer #4 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're playing husband and wife...so expect the relationship to continue to decline.
You're no longer a challenge for him...no spark...just someone who is always there. It's just not fun. Plus being so young, you have not had a chance to truly experience life yet. That is probably in the back of his mind too.
This is what happens when you have sex and move in together before marriage...especially at such a young age.
Good news though - it's all normal! :-) Hah.
Bad news - living like that makes it hard to want to get married or commit. He's already got a taste of married life...doesn't seem like he's ready for it. Pretty soon, you'll start bickering over dumb stuff - surface issues.
2006-07-28 07:59:45 · answer #5 · answered by Nightwish 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You want honest and mature advice? Here it is:
If you don't give it up on demand, he will get it elsewhere, and then he will blame you for not "putting out". I'm assuming that both of you are still very young and is natural that he is attracted to you physically. Sure, you are tired, everybody is tired after work, but if you want your relationship to work then you have to learn how to satisfy your man and he needs to learn how to satisfy you too.
Men are sexual creatures and women are emotional beings. You have to meet in the middle and compromise to meet each other's needs.
I could go go on and tell you that he is wrong and yadayadyada but the thruth is that a healthy $ex life is important in a relationship. If your libido is being affected by your work schedule TRY at least to get som energy drinks or herbal supplements to enhance your energy. Once a day every other day is a very very healthy. Life happens and you cannot go back to highschool and be worry free and do it every minute of the day.
Is natural for things to slow down on later stages of a relationship, but for now, please him if you want to keep him. You both seem pretty young and you both have a lot of growing up to do.
I'm being as honest as I can.
Good luck
2006-07-28 06:46:30 · answer #6 · answered by Blunt 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is called the real world. it is how most of us live. all men want sex everyday, but with busy schedules, its not realistic. i asked a question yesterday about how often people have sex, you should read the responses. the honest ones anyway. i get up real ealry with muy husband and i work full time and take care of our son and the house. i am beat by 9. he is lucky he gets sex on the weekend. at the beginning of the relationship he was moody and a jerk. but then he realized its not that i dont want sex (i really do enjoy it) life just gets in the way. weather he is with you or someone else, its the real world. tell him to get a grip. on himself if he has to!! LOL!
2006-07-28 06:49:15 · answer #7 · answered by mml619 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok... I think you love him more than he does love you. Why dont you put him on test ? Travel away for a week or something stay away for a while ... If he still loves all is fine you win... if not ditch him ... good luck finding a worthier boy friend
2006-07-28 06:41:46 · answer #8 · answered by Vishnu 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh my god, How old are you? welcome to the real world. relationships are about more then sex and now you are finding that out. If you have more in common with your boyfriend then what is between your legs your relationship will be OK, if not then it will not be.
2006-07-28 06:39:55 · answer #9 · answered by Joy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
and if your man penis do fall apart, you can make a hot dog out of it.
2006-07-28 06:40:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋