Do you think my childrens demands for a "living wage" are unreasonable?

Question

My children are complaining I do not give them enough money to cover their social commitments or pay for candy. The kids feel that their allowance should be indexed to reflect high inflation rates.
Is it wrong for me to suggest they just "sponge" off friends?

Answer 1

I do not know if this is a serious question but it's a funny one though! You did not mention the age group but anyway...

I was born and raised in the Philippines. As part of our culture, education is the #1 priority of parents there - whether they are living in abject poverty-they let their children finish college because as what one Filipino hero said (Jose Rizal): "The youth is the hope of our future."

There are no student loans there (THEN & NOW) so the parents do what they should do, if they can afford it-get a loan under their name (collaterals include farm animals like carabaos and rice land if you're a farmer) or work to death (if you have a low paying government job) - that is if the children want to finish college. That's why when you finish college, you pay back the parents-not the bank or loan company. Yes, I'd rather do the 1st because my parents have love and caring when they took a loan for my education and future. Yes, we were STRICTLY taught to pay them back-IN GOODS, MONEY OR IN KIND. Otherwise if you can't, then pay for the education of another sibling until they finish college. IT'S ALL ABOUT FAMILY SUPPORT. If i can't get it from my parents, i'd go to my big brother or sister (that's just for candies or a pop).

Going back: for Elem to HS children, parents give you monetary weekly allowances (for M-Fri. recess/breaks, public transportaion fare as most students there can't afford a car. Most private/public schools there does not have school buses. you either walk home or ride home using the PT).

In college, parents ONLY pay for the QUARTERLY TUITION (& dorm or board/lodging if you go to a far off college/university), but not the allowance. If they go to a local college/univ., then they live with their parents and save dorm/board/lodging. But they have to work for their allowance.

With the advent of US and European companies in the Philippines, they can nowadays work to earn their own allowances instead of getting it from their parents. Unlike before when you get everything from your parents (I feel bad!). But I was wise enough to save my weekly allowances for the weekend-like if I want to go to the movies with friends or buy a shirt I like in the mall. The most expensive 'toys' I bought for myself just saving my weekly allowances was a pair of roller skates (no counting of years please) and a Walkman Cassette player/recorder.

To answer your question, YES the high inflation rate (here in the US and around the world) give these kids some reason to demand for a living wage but only for awhile and just for candies (he he). You know they want to show off, I guess. I don’t want to meddle on how you raise your kids, but I'd strictly teach them to SAVE and choose friends well. NOTHING IS FREE NOW, YOU KNOW. And sorry, but no strong support system here. Grow up fast or die. For grown up kids, they have to work to get what they want. Kids, this is US-work or die from hunger.

Thanks very much.

Answer 2

First it is unreasonable for a kid to make "demands" to anyone. Especially their parents!

Second, the simple fact that they feel they have social commitments is a little on the eccentric side. A bit scary if you ask me.

Granted, it costs a little bit more these days to do everything. I would imagine that if you are still paying them the same amount of allowance you once made you offset that with your own funds so they can at the very least walk out of the mall with a pack of bubble gum. If not, perhaps you should increase the funds.

Sponging is not a cool trait. Cool traits should not be taught. It will follow them through life adding to society's decrepit leach cesspool.

Answer 3

There are plenty things kids can do without having to spend a lot of money. Also, they need to learn responsibilities for paying for their own things not matter how old they are. Have them do something around the house for some money or let them get a job if they are old enough. They'll thank you for it later!!

I was never given an allowance and I turned out just fine and I have respect for my parents for not spoiling me and giving me everything I ever wanted. I would be a completely different person of they had done that.

Good Luck!

Answer 4

Maybe you should buy some candy and snacks when you go shopping so they don't feel left out when their out with their friends. Depending how old they are, maybe they can do a little extra around the house so they can get extra money when allowance time comes around. It's wrong for you tell them to sponge off their friends because that might make them feel a little less fortunate.

Answer 5

Yes, its your duty to see that your children are well-fed and make sure they have enough to care for their basic needs like transportation, daily spending on food and etc. with high inflation rates. around.But having said that, you can sort of control their spending on unnecessaary stuffs. Of course your idea of asking them to sponge on others is certainly very bad, what if their friends also have fathers having the same ideas as you? Just tell your children to thrift as much as possible because of the high inflation rate so as to make the best use of their money, and also advise them not to sponge on others if you dont want others to sponge on them, ok? Teach them the saying,"there's never a free lunch".

Answer 6

Huh????? Are you on CRACK???

Kids - if they're equating their "allowance" to cost-of-living, should be doing something to EARN that money! I mean, did YOUR parents give you an allowance or did you have to earn it through proper conduct and chores? I know I did!!

Your kids should NOT "sponge" off their friends -- or their parents for that matter. Tell them they need to EARN the money - just like you do at work. Earnings should be based solely on completion of jobs assigned (and YES, all children can commit to some sort of task - even 3yo's!!).

Answer 7

I think it is wrong for you to suggest that they sponge off of friends. However, it is not at all wrong for you to suggest that they get a part time job to earn their own spending money. If they are too young for a "real" part time job or the opportunities are just not available, perhaps you could pay them for doing odd jobs around the house. It will teach them that money is earned, not free for the taking.

Answer 8

No they shouldn't sponge off of their friends. Not only is that embarrassing but you're teaching your children that it is okay to take handouts and money and anything from others. You should tell them that they'll get more money from you but they'll have to work for it. Teach them the value of a dollar, not the art of being a sponge. You don't want them thinking they can sponge off of you the rest of their lives do you?

Answer 9

If they want more money they should do more chores plain and simple. If they want to use the excuse that thier allowances dont cover real world expenses then you can let them know that in the real world nothing gets handed to you for free. If you want extra money in the real world you take on more hours or another job, so they must do the same.

Answer 10

Make them earn it. I give my kids allowance based on their age and if they work. An 8 yr old gets $8 a week providing they do all of their chores. Then I make them put half of it in a savings account.