should i bother with my friend anymore?

Question

we've been friends for 10 years, but i feel like if i don't contact her she won't bother to contact me. we live at opposite ends of the country now, and i last called her 2 months ago, i haven't heard from her, and was wondering, would you bother anymore? when we are together we get on great and I enjoy her company more than anyone else's, and she has been a good friend in the past.

Answer 1

If the friendship means so much to you, why put qualifiers on it. She may be busy, may be thinking of otther things. My mother has a friend she's known since they both were 3. (They are both nearly 80) Recently my mom had to go through a third party to get her friend's phone number....but the friendship didn't disolve. Things happen....if the friendshi means a lot, do what you need to in order to keep it alive. Otherwise, put your energy elsewhere.

Answer 2

Long term long distance friendships are different from the ones you have with people you see often.
She may have stuff going on in her life or just be a poor communicator but it sounds like you have been friends long enough to judge and you say she has been a good friend in the past.
Id say keep making the effort, its worth it.

I have a friend Ive known for 30 years, we went to school together. She lives at the opposite end of the country. There have been years when we hardly spoke on the phone. I dont see her often but next month Im going to stay with her in France and Im glad we stayed friends.

For the sake of the occasional phone call, a card at chrismas or birthday I would keep it up. Circumstances change and you may need each other one day. Its really hard to find someone once you lose contact

Answer 3

Girl, I can relate with you.

My best friend moved to the DMZ 5 years ago, and it was really hard on both of us. She's back in the States now, but we wouldn't have seen eachother had it not been for the fact that we bothered to call eachother. If your friend won't contact you, ask what's wrong and see if she is upset or something. Just try to remember that your friend is a phone call away.

Answer 4

Good friends can get past this. I have a friend that I have known since we were 5, maid of honor at my wedding and we live 2000 miles apart. We talk about 3-4 times a year but we are still great friends and are always there for each other.

Answer 5

I moved away from my home town nearly 6 years ago and i rarely have contact with my friends i left behind... but i still always take time to travel down there at least once a year and they are always happy that i have taken the time to visit them and tell them about how my life is going now. You will always be friends and will always have time for each other. She will still see all of the friends where you used to live but you have time to think about the friends you left behind. You need to make friends where you are now and start building a life there.... your best friend is your best friend, that will never change but your life goes on as does everyone elses, dont tie yourself to one friend and feel upset that your not as close... this is your chance to make millions more....

Good luck.....
Twizzle

Answer 6

Its a toughie. Sometimes friends just take different paths. I was mates with someone for 10 years, really close mates, but we kind of drifted apart in the same way that you do. Another mate of mine is going through the same thing now with someone she has known for about 13 years, and they just seem to be doing different things. If you have been friends for that long then you should be able to discuss it with her and find out if anything is bothering her and also tell her how u feel.

Answer 7

My best friend and I travel a lot and live in different countries, sometimes we dont see each other for a year or so, we email or phone about every four months.
You dont have to 'give up' on your friend, just realise she has her own life and accept that, as friends should.
Just because she doesnt phone doesnt mean she isnt thinking about you- you are probably wrong if you think that.
If you make an issue of it you will lose her friendship anyway.
She will call, but you have to let her.

Answer 8

I'm sorry to say a long distance relationship is tough to keep alive even if it's 2 females. Maybe you could write her a letter and explain how you feel. Let her be the one to decide if she wants to continue being friends or just to let it die. It's tough I know. I have a friend that lives in Washington, and I'm in California. She normally calls me, but I think we're still as close as always. Obviously we can't spend as much time together as we use to, but I still love to talk to her on the phone. So, I wouldn't write her off yet. Call her or write her and explain your feelings. Good Luck!!

Answer 9

Good Friends are extremely hard to come by. She might just be busy with the daily grind of life and not get the time. As long as you still get on great when YOU contact her, I dont see why you should stop being friends.

Answer 10

10 years..think of that!! i know dat sumtimes people drift apart.especially when dey r across "world". sumtimes it's just hard to keep in touch when we r both far away.d only thing we could do is just by calling or e-mail or chatting.still..it's much better when we could go out n hang out n sit down n chat.

i know how dat feels.truly..u can't just forget ur friendship u build for 10 years.u will regret it if u just "broke up" wif her.u n her have been 2gether for ups n down,i hope.

but yet..mybe she doesn't wanna talk to u or befriend u anymore coz she won't call u if not u r d 1 who call her.mybe..she's just bz..or for some other reasons.it's better for u to ask her about dis so u both can resolve d problem.

lastly..friendship r forever.d real friendship,dat is.