meaning...the thought sometimes crosses their minds, or the opportunity might arise but some make a conscious choice to walk immediately away from these feelings, whereas the ones who have an affair choose not to walk away. I guess the main point of my question is....can a person go through their entire marriage/relationship without the opportunity arising?
2006-07-28 03:00:18 · 26 answers · asked by applecheeks 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
It's awful to think about, but yeah, I think everyone has the potential. Most people won't act on it because they have morals - and others who are weaker tend to get swept up with it. When I stop to think about my husband even potentially just THINKING about sleeping with another woman, that is just weird and it doesn't feel very good at all. We can never fully know what goes on in someone else's head - and sometimes I really believe that's a good thing. We all hope we're with someone who won't cheat on us, and who we won't cheat on.
2006-07-28 03:05:32 · answer #1 · answered by Rachel 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I would say yes. Everyone has the "possibility" to cheat. What we have to consider is do they have the "probability" to cheat? That is the real issue...isn't it? This is as varied as each person's individual personality, ethics and situation. We can not stop our feelings. We have no control over feelings...what we DO have control over is actions. We can dwell on our feelings which is not good becasue it can make us sad, depressed and unhappy with our current situation. That would lead us to maybe "act" on our feelings and eventually ruin our relationship. We should always be cognizant of the fact that fantasy is always more exciting than real life...but fantasy rarely ever works out. Real life usually does if we put the effort into it. But since the US has turned into an "immediate gratification" society we tend to want to abandon those things that are not "quick and easy". We were brought up on TV which identified and overcame adversity, found a soul mate for life and live happily everafter in a 30-60 minute time frame. Rarely in life does that happen..but we keep on desiring this.
So you will have these feelings many times in your marriage as you encounter members of the opposite sex that hit a particular note on your happy scale. But the ultimate decision maker in those situations will be you. You can keep occupied and walk away from "stinkin thinkin" or act on those wandering feelings. But whatever you do please don't ever think that you're "powerless" over your feelings. That just doesn't ever happen.
Check out the following website. It can answer your questions much better than I can. It will also give you a "bird's eye view of a guy's' syche.
http://www.condomsbrasandstraightjackets.com/
Good luck
2006-07-28 10:18:22 · answer #2 · answered by hoyhoydc 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I suppose if they looked like a troll the opportunity wouldnt arise much, but for the most part we all eventually are tested in this way. We either decide to cheat or we dont.
2006-07-28 10:04:15 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course the opportunity will arise. Yes, it is definitely a choice, and to walk away and abide by your marriage vow's show integrity and commitment.
2006-07-28 10:17:32 · answer #4 · answered by Badkitty 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You know there are 4 billion people in the world. Duh!
Cheating has to do with character not opportunity.
Now the more opportunity you have the more character you'll need.
And quit looking for an excuse to contemplate cheating. You can think of a hot bod with the one you love without having to think about actually doing it.
2006-07-28 10:14:26 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Opportunities always exist. Opportunity arises only when you see it as an opportunity. There are times when circumstances that entice one party to stray may not be enticing to another. It boils to one's belief and outlook of life.
To answer your question, the possibility is there but how a person decides to cheat or not is when he/she see and act on the opportunity.
2006-07-28 11:41:53 · answer #6 · answered by DiL 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Opportunities always arise, it's the person's makeup as to whether they take advantage of it or not. There are some people out there that merely want someone because they are not available. If you are truly commited to someone and love them wholy then walking away is easy.
2006-07-28 10:03:36 · answer #7 · answered by hummingbird 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ummmm that is kinda like asking if we need oxygen. Of course there is a conscious choice. But the spouse needs to make the effort to love and honor the other spouse. It really is a daily battle.
2006-07-28 10:04:13 · answer #8 · answered by Carrie C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
no you can't go through married life without the opportunity arising but there is no harm in window shopping it's when you choose to buy that people get hurt
it takes a strong will to say NO
and men are weak
2006-07-28 10:08:34 · answer #9 · answered by krisclk 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good question. The fast, easy answer would be no, of course not - everyone is tempted. But that might not be true. There could be people so seriously committed to their relationships, to their vows, that although they might notice someone's attractiveness, they would never think for an instance of straying. I do believe there are people like that - lots of them, still.
2006-07-28 10:04:06 · answer #10 · answered by Mary C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋