My I guess you can call her EX and I where dating for a good 9 months and everything was going basically good until we got into a huge car accident about 7 months into it...after that we started having issues in the relationship dealing with trust and jealousy, we finally broke it off right around the 9 month mark. a month or so later I find out she slept with another girl (someone who had been an issue for us) but this was AFTER we broke up, she says she was trying to get over me, so she ran to this girl cause she was showing affection that apparently she wasn't getting from me...so my question to you all is...is this forgivable? Should I be able to look past that forgive forget and get on? Or is she in the wrong about this? HONEST answers would be much apreciated!
2006-07-27 21:52:29 · 15 answers · asked by kooks 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
From what I can make out she sought comfort with someone else after you'd split up. In which case it's none of your business.
If what you're saying is you found out (after you broke up) that she'd sought comfort with someone else while you were still together (but after you'd drifted apart), then yes you're allowed to hurt - for a while (however long you need). However, when all is said and done, it is over between you and you need to consider yourself. Carrying hurt and anger isn't going to help you get on with your life, so best try to forgive; after all, your relationship was coming to an end anyway (as you've described it).
You shouldn't forget it - but don't let it embitter you. Use it to make you grow. That is what experiencing life is all about - IMHO.
Take care.
2006-07-27 22:37:16 · answer #1 · answered by unclefrunk 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You had broken up at the time, so she didn't have to stay loyal to you. YES, it's forgivable. She apparently needed someone while you two were apart, and if she didn't know if you'd ever get back together, she ran to the person she felt she needed at the time. Forgive her and try to forget that she did this, if you two plan on being a couple again. Get past the jealousy and I bet you'd have a wonderful relationship. I don't understand what the car accident had to do with it, but if it's connected, then forgive that it happened...it was an ACCIDENT, something unavoidable at the time. Blessings.
2006-07-28 04:59:32 · answer #2 · answered by save_up_your_tears 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you trying to get back together with her? If not, it shouldn't really matter.
The way I see it is that it happened. Nothing she could say, or do now could change that. No matter how bad she feels about it. If it's in the past, then the past is always forgivable in my mind. It's the future you should worry about. Will it happen again?
Obviously she was hurting, and comfort comes in many different packages. How badly do you want to get back together with her? If you can't live with out her, then you will have to forgive and forget. If you dwell on it, then it will ruin any type of relationship you try to build.
Good luck and best wishes.
2006-07-28 05:29:55 · answer #3 · answered by gabbyx19 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like a complicated situation and I guess you wouldn't be asking if it wasn't! I think really the answer lies in you, because forgiveness is about you coming to terms with a situation. The two of you definitely need to talk because alot seems to have happened. There must still be an attraction otherwise it would not concern you. Therefore the short answer is it is forgivable, but you have to ask yourself whether you feel it is right to forgive or time to move on!
2006-07-28 05:11:57 · answer #4 · answered by waggy 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Know that Love is patient Love is kind love is not envious nor booastful love believes all things endures all things love is not arrogant or rude, these things happen in a relationship you can either act out of love and work through the problems or fall and end a beautiful relationship you choose but know this everything is forgivible it all depends how much you love
2006-07-28 04:57:28 · answer #5 · answered by Remedy 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
if you were broken up at the time then there is nothing to forgive.she wasnt yours when she did it.even though it was with someone who had been an issue for the two of you in the past,its still her buisness whos rug she munches when you are no longer together.so forgive,forget,and still be her friend.good luck and have a great day.
2006-07-28 05:55:15 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
that'll all have to depend on how you're gonna take the situation, you 2 are broken up at the time she slept with her and majority of people do go to the person that has been more affecionate, so if you 2 decided that being apart is better, forgive, life is too short to leave with anger or hate in us.
2006-07-28 05:04:44 · answer #7 · answered by adam 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would say that if you were broke up then to most people it probably shouldn't matter but I also sometimes feel that if you truly love someone even if you are broke up you wouldn't want to be with anyone else for a long time but that is just my opinion
2006-07-28 13:29:52 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
After you broke up? All bets are off. She went someplace where she knew she'd be accepted. If you broke up, you need to move on, that was then, this is now. I know that seems cold, but cold is how you get past an EX.
2006-07-28 08:17:57 · answer #9 · answered by michael941260 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If she is your ex why does it matter? Its none of your business and she doesn't need your forgivness. Get on with your life and quit dwelling in the past.
2006-07-28 08:27:01 · answer #10 · answered by golden oldy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋