How does one become "emotionally available?"?

Question

My wife says I'm not "emotionally available". What does that mean to you and what steps do you think one should take to become "emotionally available?

Answer 1

get some relationship books, etc. and learn what a good relationship is. then you'll be equipped to do something useful. also, look into codependency to learn about emotional stuff. generally, emotional availability is about listening with interest, making eye contact, giving responses to indicate you are 'there', showing affection and other feelings, smiling, caring, being happy with the other, actually enjoying the interaction, asking questions, avoiding judgments and the need to always be RIGHT, expressing empathy and concern over the other's pains and fears. there's much more..........study up on it!

Answer 2

It's a term women use when they wish we were women too. For some reason, they don't seem to realize we deal with things in a different way and expect us to overflow with 'emotional depth' and tell them about feelings that we don't really have.

Are you honestly going to read the novel above?

Answer 3

I wear a sign around my neck that says either I am emotionally available or I am not. It is highly visual and takes away the uncertainty.

Answer 4

Try doing the research.Research how politicians vote,what they vote for,who backs them,if they're one of the Grover Norquist acolytes,Who donates to their campaigns,how they vote is a signifyer if they are showing favoritism to their donars,is their money off shore. That's how you become a high information voter and quit listening to the political talking heads,they're only in it for the money and ratings.

Answer 5

When she comes home and had a bad day and wants to tell you about it LISTEN and don't judge or give advice. Don't watch TV. LISTEN, look at her ...give her a hug. Do a simple favor for her without asking. Understand what her issues are at that time. Hug more without expecting sex all the time. :) It will work! :)

Answer 6

as a soldier or cop (or star fleet officer ;o) you learn to look at life situations in a clinical non emotional sense. like playing avideo game nothing gets to you, its just characters. know what i mean? if youre not careful, seeing such death and mayhem in real life, even in the line of duty lessens your ability to be emotional when you are off the job and back with family & friends.

so, what you do is communicate with your SO listen to her and get a feel for how she is describing in words how her body language is and look into her eyes for emotional content and vunerability.

my nickname is mr spock for good reason. nothing phases me. ive been in burning bldgs, night clubs. earth quakes too. youll learn it if you apply yourself

Answer 7

Sounds like you're not sharing your feelings with her, something's bothering you, and she knows it is, but you won't tell her. You probably don't empathize with her either. I think you should try talking with your wife more, and putting yourself in her shoes for awhile.

Answer 8

It means you need to stop thinking about yourself so much and be available to help others (your family, for instance) in the emotional support department. In other words, grow up and be a man and lend support to those who need it. Got it?

Answer 9

Means she feels your closing- or shutting yourself off to her and not communicating to her what your feelings are and not allowing her to be a part of that portion of you. Try to open up and talk to her about your feelings, you may want to talk to her about couples counselling, she may be expecting too much or she may be feeling insecure about something.

Answer 10

when she says emotionally available, she probably means you dont share your feelings with her, and you dont show them either. Maybe try talking with her more, and expressing yourself alittle more. It could help