if your husband got paperwork for child support that was for a child from another woman
2006-07-27 17:59:39 · 17 answers · asked by aeval_anu 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
the child is not from before we got married it is a new child
2006-07-27 18:09:17 · update #1
Honestly.....my first response would be of devastation and then I would go ballistic and probably beat the crap out of him.......then i would contact the woman and ask her about the affair cause knowing how guys are, he may deny the whole thing. Then I would contact a lawyer, you have to get out of that relationship and make sure to leave him with nothing, i know its not the babies fault but you should not be just giving away everything that you worked hard to accumulate and build up in that marriage, let him deal with it and make sure to leave his *** broke!
2006-07-27 19:13:57 · answer #1 · answered by Jen 3 · 2⤊ 1⤋
I would like to say I would get all the facts before losing it, but truly I am an emotional being. I would probably start with 20 questions, without waiting for answers, then with accusation, while crying and finally sit down in an emotional wreck and wait for his response.
THEN, depending on response would depend on mine. If the child is older then what happened? When? Why? If it is a new baby, I would want even more answers. Especially if I did not suspect that there were problems.
After getting all the facts, then I would make a conscious decision, and a prayerful decision, about what to do next. I would definitely seek advise from someone I trust to give wise advise and not advise from what they think about how they feel about him and what he has done.
Be wise. Remember, you are married to him. Be sure the baby is even his. Get your facts before you pack up and move out.
2006-07-27 18:14:38 · answer #2 · answered by GOUTVOLS 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It would depend on how old the child in question was, and I'd want to be VERY sure it was his child--I wouldn't take the other woman's word for it, I'd want a paternity test. If the child had been born before I came into his life, then I wouldn't have a problem, and would support him in meeting his obligations to that child (assuming of course it is his.). If the child had been born after he had made a commitment to me, we would then have a much bigger problem. I would NOT be a happy camper, to say the least.
2006-07-27 18:08:00 · answer #3 · answered by basketcase88 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Depends if it was from before we got married I would be upset because he didn't tell me but then make sure he paid it and had a relationship with the child if it was after we were married first I would pack my stuff then tell him where to go
2006-07-27 18:03:36 · answer #4 · answered by Martha S 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh man thats one messed up situation .. my heart goes out to you .. that is wrong in so many wayz and im sure its very hard on you ..Im sure a big part of you wants to leave but another part loves him and wants to stay ..I cant imagine ever having to go through this but if i did I would divorce him no ifs ands or butts about it ..the trust would be gone he disrespected you ..even if I wanted to stay there is noway it would work cuz seeing that child would be a B**** slap to the face and a constant reminder of his infadelity ..i would be so hurt but i would defiantly have to say yes I would get a divorce ..I couldnt handle being disrespected like that not after marriage . I know ppl make mistakes but after marriage mistakes like that shouldnt be made ..hun you gotta do what makes you happy though ..follow your heart and be honest with yourself .. if you love him and think you can forgive him and get past this then its ok to put your pride aside ...dont listen to other ppl u gotta do what makes u happy .. be strong im here if you wanna talk !
2006-07-27 18:46:59 · answer #5 · answered by tainted.luv 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
depends on when the child was born, or even concieved, if it was before you were together then probably faint but then when you wake up you can't really hold it against him, it happened before you. if this child was concieved while you were with him then it might mean he cheated on you, do some investigating because some women just do things like this for some strange reasons, may not even be his, but if it is his then this looks really bad
2006-07-27 18:05:23 · answer #6 · answered by zether 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow. What a tangled web we weave when we practice to deceit. Consult a lawyer. You. Not both of you, you. You may love this man, but you need to protect everything you've worked for from a financial and emotional standpoint. You CANNOT be held liable for his mistakes. You just cannot. Good Luck.
2006-07-27 18:15:34 · answer #7 · answered by Shadow 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find out when this happen and how do he get a nerve to not tell you that he got a child on the outside.And find out do you need to pack his bag.
2006-07-27 18:16:22 · answer #8 · answered by Happy 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a test done first. Then figure out the dates and see when he did this.. I am sorry if this happened while u were together
2006-07-27 18:13:25 · answer #9 · answered by Mary W 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, you can assume that your lifestyle will change due to the money going out for the other child. you may want to evaluate your relationship. you would think he would have shared that tidbit of information with you. can you trust him?
2006-07-27 18:10:30 · answer #10 · answered by sinned 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋