Are all gay guys promiscuous?

Question

Ok, well to start out, I’m 16, and I came out to myself a few months ago. I live in an area with few to no gay’s. I’m sure there around here, but I just don’t know who they are. Anyways, my question is this…. The big stereotype of a gay man, at least in my community, is that he tends to be a tad promiscuous. That is to say sexually indiscriminate, loose, etc. I know that it varies from person to person, but still I wonder if as a majority, if this stereotype is correct? I feel much more stimulated by the idea of a relationship than casual sex, myself. So, I guess what I’m asking is your views on this. I don’t care who answers, but I’m probably going to believe what a gay man or woman says more than the views of straight man, or woman on this subject, simply because a gay man would more about a gay man than a straight man would. I want to believe that this stereotype is inaccurate, simply because I don’t feel that is the kind of lifestyle I want for myself.

I live in the bible belt, so that’s basically why people have such horrible options of gays here. I used to, actually. Well, that was until I realized that I was gay. That tends to cause you to rethink things a bit.

Answer 1

A s l u t is somebody who has more sex than you...
a b i t c h is somebody who will have sex with everybody but you.

The gay community is no different than the straight community when it comes to sluts. Some are and some aren't. Most people are not ready for long term committed relationships until after their mid twenties. Some get there much earlier... some never get there.

Stick to your guns, don't lower your standards... somebody out there wants what you do.

Good luck!

Dustin

PS I began my current relationship the year you were born. The people who say you can't have what you are looking for aren't the people who really know.

Answer 2

There are promiscuous people in both the gay community and the straight community. I don't know that one community would have higher rates of promiscuous behavior than any other.

For both the heterosexual and the homosexual population, there will always be a certain percentage of the population that will be promiscuous and a certain percentage of the population that will want a monogamous relationship.

Speaking personally, my partner and I have been together for 8 years as of July 2006. And at the age of 32, I have had fewer ‘sexual partners’ than just about any of my friends, both gay and straight.

You will find a lot of people in both communities that don’t want a typical ‘relationship’, but you will also find a lot of people out there looking for the same thing you are. Keep your chin up, Mr. Right is out there.

Answer 3

No, all gay guys are not sexually promiscuous. Some men are promiscuous and some are not. By men, I mean gay, straight, bisexual.

If your personal preference is to sew wild oats then you will do it.

The local watering hole where I live is a straight hangout. It is packed every night. I know straight guys who have had sex with hundreds of women.

Be happy that your desire is to find a monogamous, like-minded person with whom you can share an intimate relationship.

HOWEVER - remember that you are 16 years old. You may not even be emotionally ready for a sexual relationship. Never forget to think with the head that rests atop your shoulders, okay?

Cheers and I hope you have a wonderful life!

Answer 4

No, we are not all promiscuous. Everyone is different and there are varying types of relationships as well. The most important thing is to be true to yourself, no matter what. Both people must be peers and mutually respectful of any sexual activity decided upon. Do listen to the advice about using condoms and / or sexual practices that are safe from diseases. I fell in love with my first boyfriend at 16 and it lasted 2 and a half years. It was a very positive and formative experience for me. Enjoy your life and those you touch will be enlightened about gay people just by knowing you. Good luck!

Answer 5

I would say that it is more likely for a man (gay, straight, or bisexual) to be more promiscuous than a woman. The simple fact is that it is far easier for gay men to act on promiscuous intentions than straight men, as gay men's options aren't as limited as straight men. However, this is by no means as common as most straight people (and many gay people) believe. As a gay man, I myself have only had sex with a total of ten guys in my ten years of being sexually active. I'm currently in a relationship that has lasted over a year, and neither of us have been with anyone else. We plan on staying together for a long time, if not forever.

I would say that in my opinion, I have met far more monogamous gays than promiscuous gays. The promiscuous myth is just that a myth, that is based on a small truth used to make homosexuality seem more immoral than it is.

Answer 6

No, all gay men are not promiscuous.

I think that the vision of the wild and loose gay guy comes from the perception because gay men tend to talk about their sexual experiences more than women do.

I think it is also true that in the days before the Internet and the emerging openness of our society, in areas like the one you describe as your home area, it was VERY hard for a gay man to find a partner. So anonymous sex venues, like parks, public toilets and adult bookstores emerged. This led to some degree of promiscuity.

Answer 7

To start out I'm a 49 year old straight woman and my answer my throw you for a loop. Lifestyles do not make promiscuity, people do. My brother was gay and I have had many gay friends, both male and female over the years and like most straight people I'd say we are all looking for what's right for us, be it being celibate or being promiscuous. And for the record, my brother's opinion matches mine 100%. And one other thing, it doesn't matter who you may sleep with now or in the future, but be safe and have protected sex and I'd say that no matter what gender you'd prefer.

Answer 8

Unfortunately most gay guys are promiscuous. It's very sad but gay boys drop their pants faster than the speed of thought.

For this reason, I do not believe that gay relationships work. Even those who have been together a long time have had countless affairs or group sex with others. I am very disillusioned with the gay lifestyle. A stereotype is usually untrue but in this case I would bet that it goes without say.

Relationship? Most gays will not even know what this word means. Well, I don't mean to discourage you young guy, but I would hate to be young again!

Answer 9

I can only tell you my own personal experiences----it all depends on what YOU are looking for. There are gay men that want monogamous relationships....and there are plenty of them that just want a fling. Personally, I would have to say that even though it is a 'stereotype'---I feel that the percentage of gay men that are promiscuous is higher than it is with straight men....again, that is just my experience.

I do know gay couples that have been together 10 yrs or more, but I find that to be the exception to the rule.

Answer 10

HELL NO!!!! - what kind of bad advise have you been given. Aids started with the straight population back in the 60's but didn't gain momentum until mid 70's and then first really diagnosed in the gay comm in the early 80's. A stereotype is just that and not to be taken seriously. Most guys in our gay community are construction workers/bikers/cowboys and big butch truckers of whom you would not know any diff. These guys come home at night to a relationship with their partners and keep it monogomous. These guys know who they are and don't have to have sex with everyone they meet to prove they are gay. (infact they don't like that term, rather they are called homosexuals)

give me a break!