How can I stop my 5 month old from crying hysterically at night if I'm not the one rocking him to sleep?

Question

I have noticed that when its time for my son , 5 months, to go to sleep at night, I am the only one who can make him go to sleep. My husband can try but it wont work . My son will cry hysterically until I take him and rock him. How can we help our son from crying like this. It has gotten really bad bc when im not there he will cry and even vomit his formula. I will be going back to work FT in a month so we need a solution to prevent this from occuring while Im away PLEASE HELP

Answer 1

Well, I think you will be happy to know that YOU (and only you) have caused this problem. Also, he's going to cry if he knows you're going to pick him up. If he vomits up his formula, have dad (or whoever) clean him up and then put him back down. These are called natural consequences and it might sound harsh but he will learn. No kid ever got hurt from crying himself to sleep. Stop it now before it gets out of control (even though it sounds as if he already has you wrapped.. sadly).

Answer 2

I guess my only advise is to start sleep training him. Give him his night feeding and then put him in his crib. You or someone else can do it. Then leave him for 5 min. Stop rocking him to sleep so he can learn how to put himself to sleep. Establish a good bed time routine. My son (7 mo)knows that when I rock him with his nighttime feeding it is bed time, and then goes down fairly well, but we had to sleep train a few weeks ago. After 5 min check on him without picking him up. Then wait 10, 15, and so on. I know it seems cruel, and it is excruciatingly difficult to listen to the crying, but in a few nights it should be better. We have had to wait an hour or so for him to stop crying (total in one night). My husband has the same problem, because my son thinks it is playtime when he feeds him. On nights when I am not around he will just have to cry a little.
So hang in there, you are not alone.

By the way, my husband is a stay at home dad, so spends more time with our baby than I do. So don't let anyone tell you that your husband needs more time with him, or a better relationship, etc. None of us know your family's circumstances!

Answer 3

ok i have 6 kids and i went through something like this .
first of all have daddy spend more time putting the baby down for naps during the day , without you in the same room , also have daddy do mor ethings with the child during the waking hours , like playing with him rocking him etc im not saying he dont do the things but have him do them more often , daddy may be stressed as well and the baby sences it this will make the baby upset and im sure the more baby crys the more upset daddy gets so he needs to reamin calm , another thing u can try is before bed time like an hour before , have daddy give the baby a warm bath , and then a massgage with baby lotion to help the baby relax then get the baby dressed for bed and give him a warm bottle , but do not run into the room everytime the baby crysd , if the baby knows that mom will come and pick him up he will continue doing it , they say u cant spoil a baby yes u can . i had one son who slept from day one all threough the night even in the hospital ,
another thing u may try is if u have a nightgown or something soft of your that hubby can place on his chest or in his arms so the baby can smell t and touch it may help but i wouldnt do that for a long tim e or u would having something else to break him from and getting rid of that favorite blanky or toy is harder to do than wha tyour going through now
good luck and keep us posted

Answer 4

You should have the dad take care of the baby for a while so the baby could get used to the dad. The dad has to learn on how to take care of the baby also. Ask the dad to do all the things that you do. Askl the dad to change the baby. The baby is used to your hold and touch let the baby feel the dad's touch also. Have the dad play with the baby and talk to the baby.
You should have the dad rock the baby to sleep at night. The baby may cry for awhile but the baby will eventually get used to it.

Answer 5

Here's a suggestion you can try - let your husband rock the baby while you are in the room, maybe singing softly and patting him on the back. Also have your husband take something your wear thats comfy, like a bathrobe or pajama top and lay it on his chest, shoulder so when he's rocking the baby, the baby is smelling you.

This has worked for some couples and others have said it doesn't work. So you will have to try it and see if its an option for you.

BTW, if he gets used to someone else holding him while you are in the room you can start leaving the room more til he gets used to that as well.

Answer 6

I am sorry to tell you but your son fears your husband. At the very least your husband is not comforting to him and as the crying continues his frustration is felt by the child and it makes it even worse.

Your husband must put his priority with the child and that is hard for some men to do. I know it was always very difficult for me to "mother" ours. But I found that once I calmed down and relaxed and held either of ours in a comforting manor it worked very well.

Hard to know what is going on with yours for sure but from what you say it sounds like your son feels safe and secure with you but not so with your husband. Crying to the point of vomiting is extreme. You MUST work this out before you go back to work.

I wish I had the magic formula for you but.......

Answer 7

I had the same problem with my daughter who is also 5 months and is used to being rocked to sleep and wouldn't let anyone else do it but me. What I did was during the day when she would want to nap , I would put her in her crib and put herself to sleep. Of course the first 10 times she wasn't to happy about it, she cried and I would let her know I was there and then she would finally go to sleep. Now all we have to do is lay her in her bed and she goes to sleep on her own. Good Luck it's hard to deal with the crying at first cause you just want to give them what they want but it will be worth it in the end.

Answer 8

You and only you have created this monster.........lol
And I say that from experience. I was the only one who could rock my grand daughter to sleep when she was a baby, not even her own mother could. My daughter was sooooooooo frustrated and would come knock on my door at night.......LOL....good thing she was right next door at the time.
Anyway, your going to have to stop it..........let your husband put the baby to bed at night. And YOU need to stay completely out of the room and out of sight cause the baby will be able to sense if you are around. And your going to have to let the baby cry. It is not going to hurt him. It isn't even going to hurt if he vomits for awhile as long as he is getting plenty to eat through out the rest of the day and night.

Answer 9

When it comes to children its hard to tell sometimes... children sense EVERYTHING.... you could try sitting in his room with both of you holding him and talking to him in a soothing manner.... try soft music as well in the background... he may just want to be close to you bc ur his mommy. My daughter is like that sometimes and shes 15 months but when my husband and I do it together I think she feels safer having both of us...

Answer 10

it's because he's used to you and being rocked to sleep. no offense, and i'm guilty myself, but those are bad sleeping habits for him to be starting out with. it's really hard, but you have to stop rocking him to sleep. this is why is wakes up and cries. he associated sleep with being rocked. so if he isn't being rocked, he can't fall asleep. after you get him off the rocking, everything with your husband will right itself.