Is my mom in regret of having family?

Question

I am almost out of the house but my mother is always complaining and that is all I remember her doing for more than half of my childhood is complaining. There is a man in the house doing his job, bringing in most of the money, he is doing a great job. My mother has not been the best mother, she is always complaining about doing things like cooking and cleaning. Anything that involves taking care of us or her family. There have been numurous nights where she just won't cook anything and blame it on being tired of doing what she is SUPPOSED TO DO. The last time she cooked a meal was 2 weeks ago. Anywho, she is just constantly raving and ranting and saying "she is retiring from being a wife/mother". She is always picking fights with my dad when he does more for us than she will ever do. To me, it sounds like she just doesn't want us. And I have talked to her about it but she will get upset and tell me that I am "a liar". She comes home from work with a bad attitude and complains. :\

I am really getting tired of hearing her mouth about this.

I am not the only one that feels this way either, my father and her has had problems and yes I do know about these things because she drags me into it. And he said the same thing, she acts like she just doesn't care.

I have been nice to her! Trust me, I've tried having conversations with her but it will go on for a good while but it results into her bringing something up from the past.

WE HELP AROUND THE HOUSE.

Answer 1

Sounds a lot like my childhood. I left home when I was 18 and stayed away for three years. I had no other place to go so I had to go back home. I got back on my feet and back out on my own. I don't know what makes people act that way. I don't think I will ever have a real relationship with my mother. I love her. I don't feel as if she really loves me. She barely even calls and she recently told me that she doesn't know where I live. She has lived her all of her life. She has been to my house three times and I have lived here for a year. My father who was always the "bad guy" lives in California now. I hear from him everyday and talk to him once a week. More than my mother who lives 20 miles from me can manage. I go to her house but I feel like walking away competely. I don't know what else to do. I pray about it. You pray about your situation. I hope that you don't have to go through what I have gone through but it sounds like you will. I have learned one thing. I didn't do anything wrong. I did what I could and all I knew to do. There is nothing left for me to do but walk away. I don't know how to do that and it has been the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. She brought me into this world...shouldn't she love me? My family will say that she is crazy...but it is my sister and I who get looked down on for not coming around anymore. You are the only person who can really answer your question. I thought it would help to let you know that I have been there and things do get better...that is all up to you.

Answer 2

If your mother comes home from work and then has to cook and clean for all of you then she has a reason to complain. Both your father, you, and anyone else in the family should be helping. I am sure your mother loves you. Her complaining is the only way she has to let you know she not only feels underappreciated, but that everyone should be pitching in to help. It sounds to me as though you and your father may be treating your mother unfairly. When you get older you will understand. But for now, try to be more considerate and help her with the work. Learn to cook. In time she may complain much less and you and she will be closer.

Answer 3

I do think there is a fair number of parents out their who regret having kids. But most would porbably be too ashamed to admit it. About 60% of all kids are accidents. Out of that, I'd say there has to be at least 5-10% that always remember that they didn't wnat kids in the first place and never get over it. Maybe the result of a prolonged case of post partum depression or a longing for thier unemcumbered youth. You're nagging mom sounds like she may be one. You could frankly ask your mom about it, but she'd probably be very hurt and isulted. You say you're almost out of the house, so just tuff it out a little longer. And try not to be the same when you are a parent.

Answer 4

Okay, I am a mom of two kids, ages 8 and 11 and I don't see anything wrong with kids helping out. When was the last time you did the dishes or cleaned the bathroom? My kids are great about helping me with the house, as is my hubby. I am not a slave and neithor is your mother, maybe put yourself in her shoes. It is a harder job than most realize. So, maybe help around the house and she won't complain, as much.

Answer 5

I basically had my husband interior the room. I felt it exchange right into a private social accumulating, some thing particular basically for the two one human beings. i did no longer even enable my mom or different family individuals individuals wait interior the waiting room on the medical institution, nor come circulate to there. My mom and companion's mom weren't happy approximately it yet I informed them that if I ever provide beginning to a minimum of one in all their infants they could be extra effective than welcome to be there. ; ) friends and family individuals ought to attend till i exchange into homestead. The couple days we've been on the medical institution exchange into family individuals time for my husband and that i to bond with our new son, and for me to kick back after childbirth, this is no longer meant to be a social social accumulating with a never ending line of properly-wishers. My son is approximately to teach 8 and that i've got not regretted that determination, if I had yet another toddler i could do the comparable ingredient.

Answer 6

Your mother's problems are not your fault. However she sounds depressed. Remember that raising you has defined her life. Once the children are gone she won't have a purpose in life and that's scary. She could be feeling worthless, everyone in her life has a job or a future except her. She needs counseling but so do you. Being raised in a home where your mother makes you feel unloved and unwanted can be very defeating. You need to learn to deal with it. Believe me, I know from personal experience.

Answer 7

She might have depression that is undiagnosed. I know that this sounds like a far fetched idea, but the comment you made about her saying that she is "retiring from being a wife/mother" is a typical statement from one who's depressed. Try to convince her to see a therapist just to talk about any issues she has. You might see a world of good come out of it.

Answer 8

She needs a desperately earned and deserved vacation. She really shouldn't tell you guys constantly, but she needs to also engage her own life. A new career, hobby or social group.

Raising a family is no easy task and it can make one feel bound up.

Its also the most rewarding thing someone can do. Once you guys have gone out on your own in your own successes, she will be thrilled and proud.

Answer 9

That is really funny. The mother of one of my good friends in high school resigned from being a mother too! I didn't think that anyone else in the world would do that.

But, to answer your question, I don't think that she regrets having a family. I think that she is just unhappy and she is taking it out on those around her. Try being extra nice to her and helping her out with stuff and maybe she'll be nicer to you.

Answer 10

Well it seems like it to me that your mother is giving up on life but just hold on and something good will overcome her and she will realize that what she is doing to the family is wrong and she will be back willing and able to help the family so just have faith and don't never give up