my friend has a problem?

Question

what would u do if you were 5 months pregant, and happy, you found out your baby has down synrome would you keep it or terminate it.. thanks.. it will help my friend make an important decision.

Answer 1

terminate, terminate, terminate.

and for all the pro-life idiots:

Pregnancy should be a choice. How can somebody force a woman to carry an unwanted child? That is abuse. NOBODY can and/or should be forced to physically do something they don't approve of. Carrying a child for 9 months requires alot of PHYSICAL and EMOTIONAL energy and strength. Being pregnant is not as easy or as pleasant as some may think. Being pregnant means being EMOTIONALLY and FINANCIALLY ready to have a child. Why would somebody even think about having a child when they are on the verge of going bankrupt, living on the streets, and not being able to support themselves? How can you expect them to support a living, breathing child emotionally and physically? Why would you introduce a child to such a miserable life? They are better off dead. Poverty sticken people have the right to have sexual pleasure and sometimes, even if protection is used, mistakes happen; That does NOT mean that they should be bringing a child into this world.
Abortion is also an option for the more financially secure people. Accidents ALWAYS happen; Condoms can break, Birth control is not 100% effective, and sometimes people just forget to use protection or don't have protection at the time. That does NOT mean that they should have an unwanted child. Something else which has happened many times is RAPE. Many girls have been raped in the past and were forced to carry a child. That is the stupidest thing ever! How does that make any sense? Why should somebody be forced to carry a child which is the product of RAPE? Why would somebody even want to mother a criminal's child which is only alive because of a TRAUMATIZING experience? That's insane! Abortion is not wrong. Anybody who says "Abortion is murder" is an ignorant fool who should use their brain and THINK OUTSIDE OF THE BIBLE. Abortion is not murder. [ MURDER- Noun. The unlawful killing of one human by another, especially with premeditated malice. ] THIS IS COMMON SENSE: How can abortion be considered "murder" when the fetus was never even born? If the "baby" is not breathing and living on its own, without the the help of the mother's body, It can not be "murdered". Somebody can not be murdered untill they are born! It just does not make sense to call it "murder".
Most pregnancies are terminated before the fetus is even visible. How can it be considered murder when the fetus is almost invisible? The fetus can not feel a thing therefore nobody can say it is "wrong". Even if the fetus is already visible, "living", and breathing, it is not a REAL life. Think about it this way: If you took a 4 month old fetus out of the body of a woman, it would NOT be able to survive on its own. It is only a REAL life when the baby is viable; when it can survive on its own without the help of the mother's body...Otherwise, it is just a potential at life and NOTHING ELSE.
Even I admit that abortion during the third trimester is WRONG. For example: If you took a 7 1/2 or 8 month old baby out of a mother's body, as opposed to a four month old fetus (as I mentioned above), it is more than just a potential at life, it IS life. That 7-8 month old fetus has the chance of surviving outside of the mother's body at that early of an "age" (with medical assistance, of course) while the four month old fetus has NO chance at survival no matter how much medical assistance is provided.
Anyway, This is not about the fetus, about what it can "feel", or about what's right or wrong, It's about the Mother. A woman's body is a woman's body and NOBODY can force her to do something she doesn't want to do with her body. When a woman is pregnant, it is still HER body and ONLY her body and she can do whatever she wants with it. A woman should not be forced to go through 9 months of Physical and emotional discomfort for something that will be born into a ****** up, unwanted child. Forced pregnancies will only give the child a bad life. The child won't have sufficent love, emotional, physical, and [in some cases] financial support. This child will most likely not have a quality life and does not deserve to go through so many difficulties. The mother also does not deserve to have to deal with an unwanted child; She should not have to waste time, money, and energy to raise an unwanted child which was brought into this world by force. It is NOT fair.
Also, It is NOT about the fetus! It's about the mother! Who cares about the fetus? Since when is a tiny piece cells and tissue that can NOT feel anything more important than a grown woman? NEVER! Women are more important!

Something important:Men do NOT have the right to stop a woman from getting an abortion. Abortion is ONLY the woman's business because it is HER body and HER choice and any man's opinion does NOT count; he does not have the right to stop the woman from getting an abortion and/or judge and critisize a woman who has had an abortion, has considered getting an abortion, or one who will get one in the future. How dare a man even say that abortion is wrong when he is a MAN? He will NEVER IN HIS LIFE get pregnant. Men don't have the slightest clue about what it is like to be a woman. How can a man say abortion is wrong when he doesn't nor will he ever understand the phyiscal and emotional difficulty of pregnancy? IT JUST DOES NOT MAKE SENSE. If you're a man, I suggest you SHUT THE **** UP and GET A CLUE; The day your penis turns into a vagina and your body changes to accomodate a child inside your stomach, you will have the right to talk about abortion...Too bad that will never happen so shut the **** up. You never will have to carry a child and i'm 100% sure no man would ever want to, so why do you all assume that a WOMAN would want to?

Another big issue: Abortion is none of anybody's business aside from the mother. If all you brainwashed, brainless, ignorant, stupid, highschool drop-out, trailer trash, bible freak, pro-life whores are so anti abortion then don't get an abortion! It's THAT easy. Just worry about yourself and leave everybody else alone! Stay out of everybody's business. If we want to "kill" fetuses, then we can. It's our business, so go get a life and stay out of our lives.

Also, Many people say: "Why would you kill a child when you can just give it up for adoption? There are so many people who want children but can't have any."
That is the stupidest thing ever! Why should somebody have to suffer for 9 months? Why would they want to carry a child for no reason? Going through so much emotional and physical discomfort for 9 months is pointless if you will just go back to your life as if nothing happened and you will have no affiliation with the child afterwards...You will be thinking: "What did I just waste the last 9 months of my life doing? I could have accomplished so much in those 9 months. I can't believe I went through so much pain just to bring a child into this world whom I will never see again. etc etc"
It is a waste of time! You are only making YOUR life worse.

Even if you do go through 9 months of pregnancy to carry an unwanted child, You WON'T want to give it up for adoption after you see it. It's not that easy. Do you really think that you can give a child away after you've gone through so much to give it life and after you've had it come out of you, held it, heard it cry, etc? NO! Even if it was an unwanted child, It's not THAT easy! After it is born, You will want it.

BUT...Let's say that you DO give it up for adoption, Don't be so sure that somebody will adopt it. Please remember that there are SO many foster homes with children who have been living there for years and have been waiting for a family to adopt them. There are plenty of children in this world who don't have families, so whoever says "There are so many parents who can't have children but want children and there aren't enough in this world" are idiots! Look around you, this world is so overpopulated! Go to your local foster home and you'll see so many sad children without families. Why don't you adopt them all since you're so "Pro-life"?
The world does not need anymore unwanted children. There is not an 100% chance that you child will be adopted. If there were an 100% chance, then there wouldn't be SO many children out there without families.


Why abortion is LEGAL, should REMAIN LEGAL, and why abortion is RIGHT:

1. Laws against abortion kill women. To prohibit abortions does not stop them. When women feel it is absolutely necessary, they will choose to have abortions, even in secret, without medical care, in dangerous circumstances. In the two decades before abortion was legal in the U.S., it's been estimated that nearly a million women per year sought out illegal abortions. Thousands died. Tens of thousands were mutilated. All were forced to behave as if they were criminals.

2. Legal abortions protect women's health. Legal abortion not only protects women's lives, it also protects their health. For tens of thousands of women with heart disease, kidney disease, severe hypertension, sickle-cell anemia and severe diabetes, and other illnesses that can be life-threatening, the availability of legal abortion has helped avert serious medical complications that could have resulted from childbirth. Before legal abortion, such women's choices were limited to dangerous illegal abortion or dangerous childbirth.

3. A woman is more than a fetus. Some people argue these days that a fetus is a "person" that is "indistinguishable from the rest of us" and that it deserves rights equal to women's. On this question there is a tremendous spectrum of religious, philosophical, scientific, and medical opinion. It's been argued for centuries. Fortunately, our society has recognized that each woman must be able to make this decision, based on her own conscience. To impose a law defining a fetus as a "person," granting it rights equal to or superior to a woman's — a thinking, feeling, conscious human being — is arrogant and absurd. It only serves to diminish women.

4. Being a mother is just one option for women. Many hard battles have been fought to win political and economic equality for women. These gains will not be worth much if reproductive choice is denied. To be able to choose a safe, legal abortion makes many other options possible. Otherwise an accident or a rape can end a woman's economic and personal freedom.

5. Outlawing abortion is discriminatory. Anti-abortion laws discriminate against low-income women, who are driven to dangerous self-induced or back-alley abortions. That is all they can afford. But the rich can travel wherever necessary to obtain a safe abortion.

6. Compulsory pregnancy laws are incompatible with a free society. If there is any matter that is personal and private, then pregnancy is it. There can be no more extreme invasion of privacy than requiring a woman to carry an unwanted pregnancy to term. If government is permitted to compel a woman to bear a child, where will government stop? The concept is morally repugnant. It violates traditional American ideas of individual rights and freedoms.

7. Outlaw abortion, and more children will bear children. Forty percent of 14-year-old girls will become pregnant before they turn 20. This could happen to your daughter or someone else close to you. Here are the critical questions: Should the penalty for lack of knowledge or even for a moment's carelessness be enforced pregnancy and childrearing? Or dangerous illegal abortion? Should we consign a teenager to a life sentence of joblessness, hopelessness, and dependency?

8. "Every child a wanted child." If women are forced to carry unwanted pregnancies to term, the result is unwanted children. Everyone knows they are among society's most tragic cases, often uncared-for, unloved, brutalized, and abandoned. When they grow up, these children are often seriously disadvantaged, and sometimes inclined toward brutal behavior to others. This is not good for children, for families, or for the country. Children need love and families who want and will care for them.

9. Choice is good for families. Even when precautions are taken, accidents can and do happen. For some families, this is not a problem. But for others, such an event can be catastrophic. An unintended pregnancy can increase tensions, disrupt stability, and push people below the line of economic survival. Family planning is the answer. All options must be open.

At the most basic level, the abortion issue is not really about abortion. It is about the value of women in society. Should women make their own decisions about family, career, and how to live their lives? Or should government do that for them? Do women have the option of deciding when or whether to have children? Or is that a government decision? The anti-abortion leaders really have a larger purpose. They oppose most ideas and programs that can help women achieve equality and freedom. They also oppose programs that protect the health and well-being of women and their children.

Anti-abortion leaders claim to act "in defense of life." If so, why have they worked to destroy programs that serve life, including prenatal care and nutrition programs for dependent pregnant women? Is this respect for life?

Anti-abortion leaders also say they are trying to save children, but they have fought against health and nutrition programs for children once they are born. The anti-abortion groups seem to believe life begins at conception, but it ends at birth. Is this respect for life?

Then there are programs that diminish the number of unwanted pregnancies before they occur: family planning counseling, sex education, and contraception for those who wish it. Anti-abortion leaders oppose those, too. And clinics providing such services have been bombed. Is this respect for life?

Such stances reveal the ultimate cynicism of the compulsory pregnancy movement. "Life" is not what they're fighting for. What they want is a return to the days when a woman had few choices in controlling her future. They think that the abortion option gives too much freedom. That even contraception is too liberating. That women cannot be trusted to make their own decisions.

Americans today don't accept that. Women can now select their own paths in society, including when and whether to have children. Family planning, contraception, and, if need be, legal abortion are critical to sustaining women's freedom. There is no going back.

Answer 2

Ok, first off how did she find out that the baby has down syndrome? because without an amnio nothing is definitive. I went through my entire pregnancy thinking my son had down syndrome-well he was born perfectly normal and now he's evil and crazy just like every other 2 yr old boy. I found at 3months..i didn't have an amnio though because there was a risk we could lose our baby..we wanted him no matter what because even if a child has down syndrome they can still live a full happy life and we were in no position to take that away. It's a horrific decision and we were terribly upset but it came down to a simple question-will you love your child regardless? if the answer is yes then there is no other questions. And legally you can't terminate anymore can you?

Answer 3

I couldn't live with the guilt and sense of loss if I aborted it. If I didn't feel like I had the capacity to raise a child with Down's (and honestly for me in my own circumstances, this might be the route I chose) I would seek an adoption agency, an open adoption, and a couple who would raise it and let me keep in touch. I know that such a situation is possible. Then I could keep up with the child, it wouldn't have to die, and a couple who longs to raise a child, even one with Down's, would have that joy.

And humans with Downs don't suffer in life more than anybody else; in fact, they seem to have an unusual capacity for happiness and affection. This "disease" isn't exactly a problem for the person the way other conditions are.

Abortion is just so permanent. There is no "do-over".

Answer 4

I would keep it. I'm not saying it wouldn't be hard and there wouldn't be moments when I would doubt my decision, but I would keep it. That's why, even though I am 42 years old, I chose not to have an amniocentesis. There was no point in taking even that smallest chance because I wasn't going to act on any information I gained from it.

My heart goes out to your friend. I wish her the best. I've never met the mother of a Down's child who didn't believe that child was a gift.

Answer 5

She should keep it. It is something special that she has been given. If she feels she can not handle the child perhaps should consider adoption. This however may give her many regrets in the future. I do think that if she aborted the child she would have even more regrets. She is happy. The child will bring joy to her life. So many people want children and don't have the chance. She should feel very lucky and privileged to be a mother.

Answer 6

Remember it isn't the child's fault that there is a disorder, genetically speaking it is passed through either the mother or father's line, so maybe before they think of termination, they should think that it is their fault.

The child is very far along, and at this point they are way outside of the boundaries of the life and beating heart, that argument would save them in the first few hours of pregnancy, but...if they don't feel that they can love the child or provide the care that it needs then look into adoption agencies that are GOOD and consider adoption vs death, but sometimes adoption agencies and foster parents usually abuse and mistreat these children.

Answer 7

Personally, I would continue the pregnancy. 5 months would be far too far into the pregnancy for me to think about terminating. The baby would technically be able to live outside the womb (with TONS of medical help, of course) in just a few more weeks, so I'm not sure I could abort my pregnancy at that stage. It would be that much harder to raise a child with Down's Syndrome, but most people I know with Down's Syndrome live fairly normal lives. If it was something that would cause the child to be in pain their entire life, I would consider terminating, but not for Downs. Of course, that's MY opinion. I'm not the one in her situation and I realize it's much easier for me to say I wouldn't terminate when I'm not in the situation. But that's my opinion from my perspective.

Answer 8

I would keep the baby. I am pro life. God will not give anyone something that they can not handle. Children with down syndrom are sweeter than most other children. Yes , she will have to work harder with him. She will be able to handle it. I would still be happy , no matter what was wrong with the child. It would be my child and thats all that matters. I know tons of other people are going to say abortion. They just want the easy way out.

Answer 9

People with down syndrome can life full and happy lives. There are a lot of services out the to help your friend and her baby. As a friend all you can do is be there for her what even decision she makes.

Answer 10

This would be an easy answer for me. My sister married a man that had a child with this condition. Dawn, the child, is the most wonderful and loving child I have ever met. She brings joy to the whole family and I can't imagine life without her in it.
What if the child would have been born "normal" and then developed MS or a heart condition? Nobody is perfect.
Also, please tell your friend that all children are a gift from God and God doesn't make mistakes.

Answer 11

At 5 months, her baby is fully developed..she should not have an abortion. Also, God makes no mistakes and he is giving her a special child because He felt she could love the child no matter what. He won't put anymore on us than we can bear. Besides, there are people born healthy and without a disability who have problems or complications later in life.