My hub and another married woman had kissed and made out 2 years ago. The woman and her hub are common friends with my hub and I and another 5 couples, we have alwasy hung out and been good friends. Anyhow I found out from my elder sis about my hub and the Woman's encounter. I also know that it was once, but everytime the met at parties and all, they would stare in each others eyes, hug each other, dance closely when they could, and talk. My hub had told her that he could not see her anymore and they could be friends, but that he still liked her. Well that was still a year ago he confessed feelings. then over time we moved away from her because of hubb's job. I got prego, had a baby girl who is 3 months. However even when my hub is here, and the woman is 7 hours away, they email about daily how are yous, what are you doing, what are weekend plans, and they want to know daily, weekly details from each other. Well the woman is the one who writes my hub the emails in yahoo and
2006-07-27 09:08:44 · 20 answers · asked by toralm1 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
and myspace. when she writes to him, then my hub takes the time to reply back to her sometimes 3 in a day, other times he will wait 4/5 days to reply when he has time. But he does reply, just does not initiate? Why is that? And why is it that if he is going to be in her town, he will email her hub and other couples, including some wives and tell them he is coming or they should plan a dinner. Why doesn't he email her in that as well and ask her about dinner with everyone? Why does he leave her out, and then why does he email her all detail anyway about what he does, and his plans and his work and all that? why he can email her back 2 of her emails at one sitting? does that suggest he does like her alot still?
2006-07-27 09:11:14 · update #1
You need to talk to him.
2006-07-27 09:11:57 · answer #1 · answered by thesweetestthings24 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to put a stop to that kind of behavior RIGHT AWAY. That's not the way a responsible husband acts. His actions are hurtful to you and purely self centered on his part.
Jesus said that even lusting in your heart is the same thing as actually committing adultery.
This may be a hard message for you to deliver though. It would be better if it could be delivered by one of your husbands male friends who won't pull any punches when he talks to your husband about being a man.
Good luck with this, but stop it.
I sure hope you're not doing any of that kind of stuff. It's just plain wrong. I don't care what any swingers will tell you, it's wrong and it will destory love and trust between a man and a woman.
2006-07-27 09:20:41 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There is such a thing as emotional cheating - he's getting something from her he's not getting from you. Are you a good listener? Do you still go out alone together? Have you lost your spark you had when you first met? Have you gone to counseling? But this all boils down to is this - some need of his is not getting met with his relationship to you - so he's getting it somewhere else. ( & Too many hubs for sure!)
2006-07-27 09:14:34 · answer #3 · answered by M J 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
K, I got a little lost at the end, but really, he seems into this woman, and if I was married to a guy who was that attentive to a past person HE CHEATED ON ME WITH, I wouldn't bother talking first, I'd leave him, let him really think about what hes holding on to and losing. He doesn't email her first because he knows it would be wrong because he has feelings for her.
2006-07-27 09:16:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well obviously you are really torn about this. If it upsets you then you really need to talk to him. Be honest to him and tell him how you are feeling. They really should have that much contact with eachother since they cheated with eachother. Moving away should have helped but with todays technology it isn't helping you at all. If you want him to stop all ties then tell him. If you don't then your doing this to yourself by letting it happen. He needs to be a father to your daughter and a husband to you and no one should know your business except for you two. Especially not the cheating partner that has made your life a living hell. Speak out and let him know how you feel and I wish you luck
2006-07-27 09:19:41 · answer #5 · answered by kimber69 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hopefully you didn't have a child to hold your marriage together. That would be a BIG mistake, and too much resposibility to place un a baby.
He is cheating on you and flaunting it in your face. By cheating, I don't mean sex, but rather having relations with another woman that exuldes you. That is cheating, too. You don't have to put up with it.
He had already made his choice, though you continue to question it. Why? Are you afraid to face life alone? Would you rather be unhappy, betrayed, and unfulfilled? Is that what you want to model for your child?
Maybe you are afraid to take a stand, or he isafraid to make a move. Maybe he doesn't want to pay alimony and child support so he won't leave.
Think of your child first!!! This is bad for her, bad for you, bad for him. He needs to be accountable for his indescretions, and you need to be responsible to yourself and not take this abuse.
Leave him!!! If not for yourself, then for your child....
2006-07-27 09:18:28 · answer #6 · answered by pandora the cat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Time for hubby to let go. He is not being "friends" with this woman. He is keeping his options open. In order for your marriage to grow he has to work at it, too. I suggest that you both get counseling so he can see how much damage this little email thing is doing. Until he hears it from a professional he won't believe it.
2006-07-27 09:12:19 · answer #7 · answered by physandchemteach 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he's residing in some fantasy international... For besides the reality that reason, he needs an destroy out, and it variety of appears like it really is his destroy out. He would not choose to "commence up", appears like this lady has countless "initiative". If I were you, i ought to have a serious chat with him, and tell him to verify on. "we are friends" excuse is lame; c'mon, do *you* have ANY friends you digital mail 3-4 situations an afternoon?? With a toddler on your palms, i imagine no longer! except you're romantic companions separated for a era of time, it isn't regular to digital mail everyone countless situations an afternoon. He needs to advance up and get a grip on reality.
2016-11-26 19:25:56 · answer #8 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When does he find the time to talk to you? He is spending way to much time keeping the flame between them from going out...He seems to exercise control but I don't think he could contain it if the right circumstance presents itself.
2006-07-27 09:16:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If its that serious, you should tell your husband that it makes you uncomfortable and you would like for him to end this relationship with her.
You feel like there is more than a friendship with them and you don't like it anymore.
If he refuses then you either walk away from it or deal with it.
2006-07-27 09:13:16 · answer #10 · answered by Jae 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah all the hubs and prego lost me too...
2006-07-27 09:13:47 · answer #11 · answered by K<3C 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋