I love my fiancé to death. However there’s a challenge I’m trying to deal with. That is, if I do or say something that concerns her she will assume things to be much worse then they really are. She will also think what I did that concerned her to be something that I will always do for now on. For example if I miss her phone call she will think I never answer her calls. Or one time I spent time with my guy friends one night, and she thought I am deciding to see her less and not see her on her anniversary. I definitely wasn’t thinking that. She is not being controlling; she is simply assuming things to be bad or worse then they really are (she jumps to conclusions.) This gets aggravating. As a trait of this, she takes things very personally; as a result, I have to watch what I say. What could I do about this? I would greatly appreciate any help or info. Thank you!
2006-07-27 06:47:58 · 8 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
if you really love her, i think you should just tell her what she's doing, becuase she may not realize that she's doing it.
but, even though she may take things personally, i think that you two should be able to talk about anything without taking it offensively.
if you tell her, and just explain well, she'll understand
hopefully.
2006-07-27 06:54:36 · answer #1 · answered by flora 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I am glad this woman is stil your fiance. The things you have mentioned are things that should be dealt with before marriage. You are just aggravated now, but can you see yourself dealing with this for the rest of your life? If you were married now, your aggrevation would turn to downright misery! This woman is going to be your wife one day, you should never have to "watch what you say to her" because your afraid she's gonna blow up and get all emotional! That is no way for a married man to live. Try and get some pre-maritial counseling if you can. Your fiancee needs to understand where you are coming from or she will drive you away one day. Good Luck to you guys. You sound like you really love her. She is a lucky girl. I just hope she realizes it. Peace.
2006-07-27 06:58:24 · answer #2 · answered by Poetess_4U 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hate to say this but the only person whose behavior you can control is your own. Guess I'd think about this a LOT as if it won't get any better (undoubtedly will not without a great deal of hard work on her part) and will become more aggravating not less. I would offer to go to counseling with her (two people are involved in the problem). If it doesn't get better, you've got a hard decision to make.
2006-07-27 06:56:42 · answer #3 · answered by DelK 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
verbal substitute is the biggest piece of your relationship. So, you'll commence learning this device, even previously you're married. communicate, communicate, search for suggestion from with your fiance'!!!!! You 2 are going to be speaking something of your lives. Be open such as her. pay interest to her ideas and then percentage your own. you could't substitute her concept procedure yet you could help her to appreciate you and your techniques with suggestions from speaking such as her. proceed to guarantee and reassure her at the same time as circumstances arise. She has experienced some issues in her previous that makes her an "intense logician". (under no circumstances, continually and so on) she will study better about you as time is going with suggestions from. be affected individual. Be loving. Be form. Be mushy. Be comfortable.
2016-11-26 19:09:35 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dude, if you are having an issue this huge and you're not even married you should probably re-think having her as a fiance. She's going to send you to the loonie bin! Talk to her and tell her that she seriously needs to calm down because her actions are getting out of hand.
Hope things work out OK. Good Luck.
2006-07-27 06:53:28 · answer #5 · answered by makeitclap23 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
wow, your fiance sorta sounds like me! well i love my bf to death also, i think that its just hard because my bf is my entire life, and when you have your life staked up on one thing, it would be so easy for everything to be ruined. maybe she cares for u so much she's scared of what might happen. theres always that "what if" that concerns girls. i think that once your married and once you have a life together, she will accept things and not worry so much. but for right now i think that u should just be patient and tell her that u love her whenever you get the chance. i agree that u should have your time, but i dont know, im positive it will get easier, and then the result of love and trust will be sooo worth the time it took.
2006-07-27 06:55:05 · answer #6 · answered by missy_t_09 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Um, hate to say it but she is being controlling. Not by telling you what to do, but by making you miserable when you don't do what she wants. You can talk to her about it, and if that doesn't work get out now.
2006-07-27 06:53:51 · answer #7 · answered by Phil 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
She is a very insecure lady..... needs to talk with someone about that.........To live with someone like that can be pure hell later..... good luck
2006-07-27 06:50:54 · answer #8 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋