WELL MY HUSBAND AND I HAVE DECIDED TO SEPERATE BECAUSE I'M CONFUSED ABOUT WEATHER OR NOT I WANT TO BE MARRIED OR SINGLE......I AM ONLY 18 AND I JUST FEEL SO TRAPPED BEING MARRIED....I LOOK AT ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE MY AGE HAVING FUN AND DATING AND I FEEL LIKE I'M MISSING OUT ON SOMETHING....I THOUGHT THAT I WAS READY TO BE MARRIED BUT KNOW I'M JUST CONFUSED...I ALSO THINK THAT IF WE SEPERATE WE MAY NOT STAY MARRIED....I DO LOVE MY HUSBAND I JUST THINK THAT MAYBE WE SHOULD HAVE DATED A LITTTLE LONGER. I THINK I STILL NEED TO GROW UP......I ALSO AM AFRAID THAT ONCE WE BREAK UP I'M GONNA REALIZE I DON'T WANT TO BE SINGLE ANYMORE AND IT WILL BE TO LATE......ANY ADVISE ON WHAT I SHOULD DO? I KNOW IT'S SOUNDS CRAZY!!!!!
2006-07-27 04:17:32 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR ABOUT 9MONTHS AND I HAVE A 10MONTH OLD SON...THATS NOT WITH HIM.....I HAD MY SON B4 WE MET EACH OTHER
2006-07-27 04:47:44 · update #1
ME AND MY HUSBAND BOTH LOVE AND TAKE GREAT CARE OF MY SON.....I KNOW YOU HAVE TO GROW UP WHEN YOU HAVE A BABY AND I HAVE I HAD MY OWN HOUSE AND WAS DOING IT ON MY OWN B4 I MET MY HUSBAND....BUT EVEN BEING A TEEN MOM DOSEN'T MEAN YOUR DEAD TO THE WORLD AND NIETHER SHOULD BEING MARRIED
2006-07-27 05:17:12 · update #2
You should have never jumped in and made a commitment that you were not ready to handle. You should seriously think about what you are doing to this person you say you love. I believe that if you continue down the path that you are that you will lose him. If you think you are missing out on the fun things in life, then you should get away from him and start over and be very cautious the next time you take a step as seriously as you did.
2006-07-27 04:22:29 · answer #1 · answered by swtz69drmz 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This doesn't sound crazy. A lot of other people your age have been right where you are now so don't feel bad about this. It's natural that your feeling this way because your so young. 18 yrs old is really young, your at a point in your life where it is just getting started. I won't ask you why you didn't think about all of this before you got married, but I will say that you probably were head over heels in love with this guy and it seemed like the right thing to do at the time. Once your in something like this it's a whole new different ball game. You really have to think about what you want to do and stick with it because marriage isn't a game. You can't split up with him have the freedom that you want as a single person again, and then finally realize that you have had fun and lived your life so your ready to settle back down again. If you feel as though you really need to grow up then you need to listen to your heart because what's going to happen down the road is that you and him will have a lot of problems and you will carry around this resentment of getting married way to early. This type of thing could also make you want to cheat if the situation was right. If you two are destined to be together and it's part of both your futures then things will work out that way. Who knows how things are going to end up, but you do need to make a decision and stick by it no matter what.
2006-07-27 04:31:01 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been married? It sounds like the sensible thing to do to separate for now, especially since there are no children involved yet. But it makes me wonder why you got married so young in the first place. You're right, though being married at 18 is too young, and there is a lot of stuff you will be missing out on. If you stay married, you may be spending the rest of your life wishing you would have left a long time ago. Good luck, honey!
2006-07-27 04:23:54 · answer #3 · answered by Littlemissy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're right, it sounds crazy because the two of you rushed into a commitment that shouldn't be taken lightly. Marriage is a strong part of your lives that would bring about the learning experience of life in so many ways. So, by you not giving yourselves time to mature for this type of commitment you feel trapped. There's time to do this after having fun and learning what's in the world for making a foundation for your lives. Now that you are married you will either do what's expected to learn together or separate and go your different directions. The decision won't be an easy one either way, but be prepared to deal with the outcome of it.
2006-07-27 04:29:13 · answer #4 · answered by msthinkpositive 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Good morning; When I was 18 y/o I could not make up my mind either. I was always afraid that I would make the wrong decision and it would affect me for life. At 56m the truth is we will all make wrong decisions and life will go on. If you are separated now, date. You have come this far so try what you need to try. Maybe, if you two can stand it, date each every so often. You can experience both worlds. You might find an open relationship is for you both. Maybe just foe one. It sounds like yopu want more out of your love life than what it is at the present. I wish sometimes I had not gotten married so I could still date just like you. In short you are in position to try dating and see if you are happy with more than one person in your life or not. Good luck. I wish you well.....Nick
2006-07-27 04:27:13 · answer #5 · answered by nick w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey, if you were just dealing with a marriage at your age, that would be one thing. But you have a child.
Your opportunity to play and have fun and party and be a wild teenager is gone now. Your life now has to revolve around your little one. Do you need to grow up? Yes, and fast. Your life is no longer your own, and if you're selfish about getting what you want, your child is going to suffer.
About your marriage... yeah, you probably married this guy way too soon. If he's a decent guy, put your heart and soul into working it out. If he's not a good man, get out, and spend your life making your child's life good. You can do what you want when your kid turns 18.
2006-07-27 05:10:33 · answer #6 · answered by SLWrites 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not crazy at all.... I married my first husband at 19. Even though we had dated for 6 years it was definitley different being married. I wanted to go out and have fun with my friends and he wanted to stay at home all the time. I had oats that needed to be sowed. The need that I felt to go out was very strong and I was willing to give up my marriage at one point to feed it. I reccomend not taking such drastic measures as breaking up with him. I know after we decided to seperate it was never the same even when he came back home. Try to talk to him. Tell him you need to have some sort of life out side of home. Do not get involved with people that influence you to do stupid stuff. You are married and there a some things that are not appropiate to do. Being married does not mean that you are dead though. See if your husband will compromise. Maybe go out one weekend and stay home and do what he wants to do the next. I wish I would have been able to to this with my marriage but, I went wild and we ended up divorced soon after. Sometimes you just need one GOOD Crazy night out to make you feel better. Try it with him, have some drinks and you might see that going out is not as important as you though.
I will tell you that I regret not being mature enough at the time to step back and look at the bigger picture. Once they are gone it is really hard to get them back. I have been divorced for 6 years now and I still regret the day I chose partying over him.
Good luck and I hope this helps.
2006-07-27 04:34:14 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love each other no amount of dating is going to change your feelings for each other. Have you thought of seeking marital counseling. There are some books you can read like the five languages of love, there are so much more books than that. But before you stop your marriage before it even gets off the groundstay for a while. You will see that you can have fun even when your married. Good Luck. Dont become another statistic.
2006-07-27 04:24:26 · answer #8 · answered by lil_frosty93654 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
actually it doesnt, for one if you havent been long then it mite still be the what am I missen feelin, but it does sound like you are too young, the thing is that it is more likely you wont get back together after, and if do will have problems on what you both did while seperated, the thing is you cant have it both ways and gotta sit and think of what it is you both really want and go from there marriage is a full time job and alot of work cant just stay together as when ya dated, alot of sacrafice and comittment is the only way to stay together good luck and dont look back after makin the decition
2006-07-27 04:24:30 · answer #9 · answered by BRIAN J R 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You've just completely pissed me off. You and my ex-husband must have been talking to each other lately! Earth to you!!! You should have considered all that before making such a sacred commitment. Marriage isn't a fly by night thing. Marriage is a friendship, partnership, commitment... Why didn't you consider these things before? If you love your husband, these things should not be forcing an end to your marriage. It's only natural to wonder, but to end your marriage to test things out? Outrageous! Sit down and think long and hard on this. Stay with your husband. Ending your marriage to be single, party, and such is absurd...
2006-07-27 04:30:36 · answer #10 · answered by ridersinthesky11 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋