For the ladies about relationships, marriage, sex and the lack of it.?

Question

I am a middle aged male, married for the second time and still cannot understand why both females have a lack of desire for sex.
What frequency of sex or desire to have sex do you consider normal?

Answer 1

you won't have to search that hard through these questions to find that women are complaining of the same thing........

point being, it's not a gender thing, like we'd all like to believe. it's individual. I think in your case, look at the common denominator, being you. Perhaps there's something you're doing that isn't quite making your wives feel aroused, mentally or physically. Perhaps you chose the same type of woman twice......whatever type that is. Perhaps both relationships are having the same exact problems, and the problems you had the first time, you have carried into this marriage before fixing them. Women differ greatly. I find that most women in general have low libidos based on the mental state. If the relationship is strong and you keep it fresh (which is 50% your job you know) then things usually don't get to this point where they have no desire. Think of what kept your physical relationship alive back in the beginning.....try to recreate that. We get into boring routines and stop trying to impress each other like in the beginning. People stop trying.......that's what the problem is. She should be"trying" too.

Answer 2

The Cleo and Cosmo God's here in Aussie land have made mention in the past that the average couples intimacy levels is 4-5 times a week. Of course in my circles that maybe about right for a fortnight. Maybe you need to find how to increase your wife's desire in other ways, you never know what might trigger a big response. All the best.

Answer 3

"Normal" is different for everyone. Women do not lack desire for sex, though I believe (in general) we don't think about it nearly as often as men do. A woman's sexual peak is later than a man's - usually around the mid 30's. Your wife's age may have something to do with it if she's young and/or just hasn't peaked yet, so don't assume she lacks desire - it could just be a hormonal thing. Be patient! In the long run, we're so worth it!!! ;)

Answer 4

Was it like that before you got married? When I'm with my partner, we have sex (different kinds of intimacy) more than once a day, but if we were living together, it would likely be more like every other day on an average. How old are these women? Do they take any medication? Do they have any health issues? "Normal" is very relative, but I think for most married couples, a few times a week, depending on health and schedules, should be normal.

Answer 5

"Normal" is not really applicable to this kind of question because there are a lot of factors. If your current wife is menopausal, there may be a reason for her sex drive being less than yours.

During menopause, sex drive can drop to very low levels. Some women find they don’t think about sex nearly as much as they used to before menopause. Others find they want to have sex, but just aren’t enjoying it enough to make it worth the effort. Decreased libido is thought to be due to lowered levels of estrogen, progesterone, and testosterone present in her body during menopause. Women in menopause experience vaginal dryness, fatigue, mood swings, depression, and remember, self-image is often a major factor in a woman’s sex drive. If she feels uncomfortable with the way her body has changed during menopause, she may not be willing or able to share physical intimacy with someone else. Incontinence, weight gain, and changes in her skin and breasts can all affect the way she feels about her sexuality.

God was not kind to women in this regard.

There are treatments if she is interested in raising her sex drive. Hormone creams, Hormone Replacement Therapy, lubricants, etc. Nonetheless, remember all this Sh*t doesn't happen to men and so you need to be a little more understanding.

Answer 6

Women go through phases where they aren't that active sexually....and don't want to be....there may be underlying issues, like depression or something that triggers it. I think 3 times a week is good for me and my husband. Sometimes it's more and sometimes it's less.......

Answer 7

2 to 3 times a week it is a normal for a normal man if u r?

Answer 8

if i dont have orgasm's most of the time, i dont want to have sex, i just feels like a chore. If she has orgasms she will be looking forward to the next one

Answer 9

Maybe they just have a lack of sex with you. Sound like you're not getting any, so for you any sex at all must be appreciated.

Answer 10

every one in this world is different...men are the same in that particular subject...it doesn't matter how many marriages u going to have, but depends on how frequent she wants it..better ask her...